I'm going to face my depression

[ShigZal]

Hi everyone,

my life has been a total mess and everything is falling apart. I'm broke, have no friends and not to mention I'm depressed for a very long time. I need 1 to 3 hours to fall asleep and the same amount of time to get up. I can't live like this anymore.

On my worst times I cry nearly every day, even the smallest tasks cost me a large amount of energy. My parents ask me "How are you?" and I just pretend everything is fine. Therefore I finally decided to work my way out of this misery. 

It's not the first time I'm trying to succeed in this journey, but it will be my last, no matter the outcome. I started to work out two months ago. While my mental health is still not good, I created a momentum in this after some time. A burden becomes a habit that I actually enjoy.

I didn't want to do everything at once, because this would be the fast route to my downfall. But now it's the time to focus on more areas. I actually feel physically more energized after more than 2 months of working out and eating healthy.

There is still a very long way to go, but I must believe that I will succeed this time, because this is my only f***ing option.

Is anyone in a similar situation as me? Please let me know how you are handling it.

Kind Regards

[Foxhall]

On 3/21/2020 at 5:39 PM, ShigZal said:

I actually feel physically more energized after more than 2 months of working out and eating healthy.

well that sounds positive, keep going,

the friends will happen too

[alphamale]

are you seeing a psychiatrist for your depression?  that is the first thing to address

[Soak]

Yes..

Exercise and diet is a good start!

know that you are not alone

[Ellener]

On 3/21/2020 at 12:39 PM, ShigZal said:

Is anyone in a similar situation as me? Please let me know how you are handling it.

I was. I developed severe anxiety disorder after the Harvey flood and losing my home. 

Diet and exercise are the definite way forward with mental illness, and the feeling that every little thing is an acheivement- reward yourself with positive thoughts or write it down, as you have found it's hard to tell loved ones.

That's why a counsellor or doctor can help, they are objective and you don't have to 'protect their feelings'.

It was a difficult couple of years, I admit, but right now I find myself still without a home, living with an alcoholic, in the midst of the pandemic, and I thank God and every single person who ever helped or encouraged me to be well, because I am witnessing first hand just what could be happening to me if I hadn't got better. And despite everything- I am resilient and surviving. And proud of myself for getting here.

So hang in there, you are doing the right things.

And you will be happy again, I am, despite everything, and despite everything crazy around me right now.

Sending you much love and hope and good thoughts and prayers. 

 

 

[preraph]

I don't know if this will help, but it might.  I have always taken a long time 1-3 hours to go to sleep.  Don't fight it.  Go to bed earlier and plan to stay there longer.  I honestly end up staying in bed a full 12 hours so I get enough sleep.  On top of going to sleep slow, I wake up throughout the night too.  Sometimes for a couple of hours and then go back to sleep.  It's how long it takes you.  If you will go to bed earlier and not fight it, and stay in bed long enough to get your sleep out, you should wake up faster in the morning.  I like to wake up naturally and if I do, I feel better.  So go to bed early enough you wake up naturally by when you must get up.  

 

 

[Ellener]

53 minutes ago, preraph said:

Don't fight it. 

Google 'sleep hygiene' too, it's about creating a routine to be calm enough to rest, then sleep. 

[preraph]

I leave the tv on low and on something calm.  It's not always easy to find.  But when I wake up through the night I like having it on.  

 

I used to have trouble sleeping for many years from fear of things.  But not now.  But to get over it, someone convinced me to go ahead and sleep with some lights on, which the tv is also good for, and then I leave a kitchen light on.  I sleep better knowing it looks like someone is awake.  And then having a dog really helps so much.  

[Ellener]

51 minutes ago, preraph said:

having a dog really helps so much.

it's a cliche but my rescued dog rescued me...🐕

[CautiouslyOptimistic]

2 minutes ago, Ellener said:

it's a cliche but my rescued dog rescued me...🐕

So true.  My dog was not a rescue, but.....I don't know what I would have done without him during some of my darkest times.

[preraph]

7 minutes ago, Ellener said:

it's a cliche but my rescued dog rescued me...🐕

I had one I consider my angel.  We saved each other from bad times.

[homesickclutter]

Hi. I agree with Ellener. Healthy diet and exercise would be a big help. I think you should also seek for a professional help as they will be able to help you manage what you are going through right now. You will be fine soon. Stay positive. 

[mortensorchid]

Absolutely what others have said : diet and exercise are great ways to improve you physically as well as your mental health.  Having once been 40 lbs fatter than I am now I have been there : aches and pains, feeling sick all the time, tired, plus I was depressed and despondent about anything and everything.  Since I dropped the weight, people told me how I changed (not as quick to anger, being very zen and more pleasant to be around, etc.).

I also agree that you should see a shrink.  You will work out things from yourself that are causing the issue.  Also, do you know anyone who is psychic?  That may sound strange, but I have known 5 people who were truly psychic.  One of them said to me when he met me that he could see me.  I asked what he meant.  He told me things that had happened that I never repeated to anyone else, he said that's what he does for others.  He said I put up this armor before me because people had hurt me in the past, which I never told a soul.  It will give you insights.