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Should I reach out?


ms.stressed

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ms.stressed

It's been 3 months...

 

A part of me wants to reach out and say, "Hey. I'm sorry for being mean and lashing out. I hope you'll forgive me. I love you."

 

Then there's a part of me that's asking, "do you want me? I hope you want me. Please want me."

Or do I leave it at my last email. The one in which I said I was sorry and told him everything. 

 

The rape, everything. Idk...Idk. 

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I would never reach out to someone after three months and start the conversation with "I love you". It is quite possibly that you miss this person but I still would NOT write that to him. You could just reach out and say hi, how are you doing? Maybe start a friendly conversation and try to build something with the guy, all the while staying committed to your therapy, your own well being and healing. 

Edited by Realitysux
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8 minutes ago, Realitysux said:

I would never reach out to someone after three months and start the conversation with "I love you". It is quite possibly that you miss this person but I still would NOT write that to him. You could just reach out and say hi, how are you doing? Maybe start a friendly conversation and try to build something with the guy, all the while staying committed to your therapy, your own well being and healing. 

This. Just read your other thread to get a bit of background info. If you want to contact him just keep it simple, not all emotional. If he wants to contact you back he will. If he doesn't then that is your answer and carry on working on yourself until you find someone else.

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Hey ms.stressed; I hope you're doing ok. You are a remarkably brave & strong individual to come through what you've experienced so don't forget that.

I would reach out. Clearly, that wasn't you speaking to your friend; it was an understandable emotional outburst based on circumstance. One would hope, given the passage of time now too, that your friend would recognise that.

As to what to say, you are in a position were you have nothing to lose. That gives you freedom to express how you feel in a calm & considered manner. I'm a firm believer in getting things off your chest if you feel you have something left to say; it allows you to move on if needs be knowing you've done all you can do.

I really hope this works out for you. Take care x

 

 

 

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Look, when things got complicated and emotional, he bailed.  So I agree with the others that if you contact him, nothing deep and emotional, but just casual "How you doing?"  No confessions.  Some men really freak out when things get too deep, you know?  And he's one.  He's probably thinking it's above his pay grade or the like.  But if he stays in touch and you see him, still just see if he ever brings it up and asks how YOU are.  And honestly, if he never does, he's not worth it.  Because you're the one who needs some sympathy and love right now.  But just be casual and see if he ever asks about things with you.  

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