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What do Men Desire and Value in a Woman?


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8 hours ago, basil67 said:

Probably just as well you're not looking for a relationship.  Narcissism wears very thin very quickly.  

If that was true, Boris Johnson, Trump, Bolsanero, and others would've been divorced by their wives a long time ago.

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SummerDreams
1 hour ago, Azincourt said:

If that was true, Boris Johnson, Trump, Bolsanero, and others would've been divorced by their wives a long time ago.

Right, because all these celebrity people know the true meaning of marriage and that's how they live their lives. Just an advise, start living in the normal people's world and let the celebrities do their thing. You are not becoming one of them any time soon so stop using them as examples for everything.

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1 hour ago, SummerDreams said:

Right, because all these celebrity people know the true meaning of marriage and that's how they live their lives. Just an advise, start living in the normal people's world and let the celebrities do their thing. You are not becoming one of them any time soon so stop using them as examples for everything.

What does being a celebrity have anything to do with anything?

A guy who is rich or famous can't be happy in a marriage because of his social status and power?

What is the true meaning of marriage?

Who gives the true meaning of marriage to marriage?

Quote

Just an advise, start living in the normal people's world and let the celebrities do their thing. You are not becoming one of them any time soon so stop using them as examples for everything.

Good point!

I'll use the nearly 70% divorce rate Belgium has been having to use as my examples as normal people living in a normal world.

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Kitty Tantrum
On 4/1/2020 at 10:52 AM, CAPSLOCK BANDIT said:

I want a woman I can live with, not a woman I can love... The love will come later, but if I can't stand your personality, then I'm not going to be motivated to go the extra distance for you.

I knew I had a solid shot with my husband early on when he said to me... NOT "I love you," but:

"You know, you really don't do anything that annoys me." 🤣

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simpycurious
15 hours ago, Kitty Tantrum said:

I knew I had a solid shot with my husband early on when he said to me... NOT "I love you," but:

"You know, you really don't do anything that annoys me." 🤣

that's pretty good Kitty...I guess it's a romantic comment in and of itself.  You can have a different point of view with someone and still be there with them and be able to LISTEN to what they have TO SAY.  It's not always easy to be a good listener. 

 

 

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I never get these kind of things because.. I could write you a list, but then I’d throw it out the window when you meet a girl at it just.. *clicks*

Not including Short term flings & hookups, I’ve had three ‘serious’ girlfriends.. they couldn’t have been more different!

Sense of humour is massive for me.. you could 100% laugh me down the aisle... but even then there’s different types of ‘funny’!

 

Serious girlfriend #3, I didn’t even really notice her when we first met - I noticed in that she was very good looking in like a flawless kinda way, but that alone is not my biggest turn on so it was her best mate I noticed, just for being a proper laugh, up for everything, outgoing, really friendly! Said mate had a boyfriend so it wasn’t even a romantic thing, I just thought she was cracking company and that was why I started hanging out with them!
Only as I got to know them better, that’s when I got to know my ex. She was actually really shy, lacked a bit of confidence (not the ‘out going’ or ‘laid back’ that I’d list if I was going to lay out “what I desire” to you). But as she got comfortable with me, I realised she was properly hilarious, a right little wind up she’d match me toe to toe with some banter which I just love! And it was then that I suddenly started to like look around for her all the time, and notice her when she walked in a room and be like ‘**** she looks like fire’ 🔥

But it just keeps changing.. it wasn’t till I started dating her that I considered maybe the things that became most important weren’t her looks or her humour! But the fact she was really kind. I respected that a lot about her. And I think it felt more stable, more ‘homey’ than any relationship I’d ever had - and they were things I didn’t know I was looking for!

She is the one I have regrets over, she’s the only one where I think I really ***ked up.... but 100% that girl is to this day, the love of my life, and yet.... I didn’t notice her for weeks, and she wouldn’t have ticked the boxes on a list I’d write for you now! 🤷🏼‍♂️
 

I think that’s the fun of it though - people aren’t predictable and they don’t conform, no matter how much you try to figure them out you never will! 😁

 

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SummerDreams
54 minutes ago, Ollie180 said:

Sense of humour is massive for me.. you could 100% laugh me down the aisle

You are my soul mate. This is exactly how I feel and I couldn't have said it better (but I'd be in the other thread about what women want from men 😛 )

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4 hours ago, SummerDreams said:

You are my soul mate. This is exactly how I feel and I couldn't have said it better (but I'd be in the other thread about what women want from men 😛 )

Haha!!

I should probably ask what you’re drinking then? 🥂😉

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SummerDreams
10 minutes ago, Ollie180 said:

Haha!!

I should probably ask what you’re drinking then? 🥂😉

Nah I'm not drinking anything. But between us, do we need anything to drink with all this craziness around us? You can't call this situation we are living in exactly as sobriety! 😛

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On 4/7/2020 at 5:14 AM, Ollie180 said:

I never get these kind of things because.. I could write you a list, but then I’d throw it out the window when you meet a girl at it just.. *clicks*

Yep. Same with women concerning guys. You think you’re looking for one thing, but all of a sudden there he is. Everything you said you never wanted. *He hates dogs and rap, is a stickler for punctuality and never says he’s sorry. But his eyes are deep blue pools that you want to swim in and your heart wants him so bad it can’t stand it. It’s like some cosmic joke. Or test maybe.

*All similarities to persons dead or alive are purely coincidental. 🙄 

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Cookiesandough

Also, sorry to say, but I don't think the men at loveshack are the best representation of all men. Just seems to me a man who would seek out, and much less stay at a relationship advice forum are a bit more sensitive or even ' romantic 'than average. I mean most men never make it out the dredges of reddit or bodybuilding.com  to find their way to this community.. JMO..

Edited by Cookiesandough
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On 4/3/2020 at 1:14 AM, Azincourt said:

What does being a celebrity have anything to do with anything?

A guy who is rich or famous can't be happy in a marriage because of his social status and power?

What is the true meaning of marriage?

Who gives the true meaning of marriage to marriage?

Good point!

I'll use the nearly 70% divorce rate Belgium has been having to use as my examples as normal people living in a normal world.

 

 

 

70% eh , shyt.  lt's a wonder anyone bothers anymore now then.

 

 

 

 

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  • 2 weeks later...
miranda561
On 3/27/2020 at 12:21 PM, 5x5 said:

I'll play.

So here's my list, as drawn from experience of what works for me.

I desire a woman who makes me feel an electric buzz in the air of attraction, excitement and sexual tension.

I desire a woman who I can't help but smile at them, when I see there eyes.

I desire a woman who can't help but smile at me, when they see my eyes.

I desire a woman who I find aesthetically pleasing at their age. While also having that hard to define, special something (prettiness, character, wit, movement, brains etc) that grabs me.

I desire a woman who has a really pretty face and pert breasts go a long way as well.

I desire a woman who is really good at kissing and is highly sexual, good at sex, likes having a lot of sex and is up for and into all of or most of my sexual proclivities.

I desire a woman who is comfortable with herself, accepts herself, likes herself and is happy to be herself, where ever that take her. 

I desire a woman who is genuine and authentic, tells it like it is, doesn't feel the need to tip-toe around people.

I desire a woman who is a pleasure to talk to and is lots of fun to be around as well.

I desire a woman who is highly intelligent, capable, practice and is also highly accomplished at whatever things they pursue.

I desire a woman who appreciates visual arts, live theatre and shares a similar taste in music as well.

I desire a woman who has a love for literature and a passion for history as well.

I desire a woman who is willing and keen to take all of her clothes off to pose for me, so I can draw her and make splendid watercolour paintings of her. Plus who is also willing to pose nude for my photography as well.

I desire a woman, who isn't a wowser or a prude.

I desire a woman who isn't convinced that gods exist and doesn't care for religion or any other spiritually or woo.

I desire a woman who wants me, but doesn't need me and wants me to want her, but does not want me to need her as well.

So not a lot of desires then 

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CaliforniaGirl
On 4/2/2020 at 3:56 AM, Azincourt said:

If that was true, Boris Johnson, Trump, Bolsanero, and others would've been divorced by their wives a long time ago.

Those guys are incredibly rich and incredibly high-profile and their wives are incredibly shallow. You're not talking about average couples. 😏 And even given that haven't they all been kicked to the curb by wives?

ETA: I should add that I'm not saying anybody here "should" or "shouldn't" want certain things in their partners, I hope this comment didn't come across that way. I know the thread is asking what men want in their partners. I was talking about these three ^ world leaders and whether they've been kicked to the curb...they all have. 😏

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Trail Blazer
On 3/28/2020 at 7:21 AM, alphamale said:

a sense of humour....but finding that quality in a female is like trying to find a needle in a haystack

I disagree wholeheartedly with this.  From my experience this hasn't been the case at all.  Who knows, your sense of humor may be very different to mine, though. 🤷‍♂️

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Trail Blazer
On 3/29/2020 at 7:20 AM, K.K. said:

Hey... I was just remembering something that a poster here said. (Maybe Capslock?) Anyway, he said that men wanted to feel needed. His example was trying to help a lady with her car (forgot the details) but that she said nah she was good and didn’t need him. 

So a bit later she asked him for help (man I hope I’m remembering this right) and he said nahhh forget you! 

His point was that men wanted to feel needed. In that way. Like if a guy tried to hold the door for me and I said nah I’m ok. He would feel offended. (I wouldn’t turn down his door opening offer though.) 

How much independence is too much? Does it get to be a turn off somewhere along the line at some point? 

I don't think I want to feel like I'm "needed" as such.  Feeling like you're needed is quite a lot of pressure.  I do want to feel as though aspects about me are highly valued and appreciated, however.

To feel as though you compliment someone else helps the feeling of security that we all require when in a relationship.

My girlfriend is an very intelligent and capable person.  She's survived 36 years without me and thrived, so she certainly doesn't need me as such.  However, in the last seven months we've dated, she's emphasized how much shr values and appreciates the aspects about me which she sees as bringing value to her life.

It's a great feeling for me to know that I can be myself and compliment my girlfriend's life fairly effortlessly.  She's also very receptive to my efforts and doesn't try to compete with me.  Although tne relationship is fresh, we are very compatible and this was evident from the first date.

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Trail Blazer
On 3/29/2020 at 11:14 PM, Realitysux said:

I'd like to share a secret with all you men out there. Do you know how easy it is for us to find a man? It's a lot easier then you might think. These days the guy doesn't even have to be single and married men spend more (not my style personally) You don't choose us, we choose you! You can waste your time trying to find someone to fit your checked off boxes but you better be worth it because we have a lot more options then you do! You can wish we were this and that but in the end I don't know one women who would give a s*** what a man wants them to be. The other post fit better because men are the ones who need to know what a women wants. 

*than

Have you been hurt in the past?  You sound very defensive!

Let's be clear here; nothing you've shared is "a secret" 🤣🤣🤣

You have your logic all wrong.  No man finds a woman and then "wants her to be this or that."  He find a woman who already fits "this or that."

Men and women choose each other.  I'll choose to pursue someone who I find attractive just as, in the case of my current relationship, she made it clear from the outset that she was interested in me.

Your flagrant disregard for what men want makes you sound like a very entitled individual.  What value do you believe you could bring to a relationship with an attitide like that?  

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Realitysux
8 minutes ago, Trail Blazer said:

*than

Have you been hurt in the past?  You sound very defensive!

Let's be clear here; nothing you've shared is "a secret" 🤣🤣🤣

You have your logic all wrong.  No man finds a woman and then "wants her to be this or that."  He find a woman who already fits "this or that."

Men and women choose each other.  I'll choose to pursue someone who I find attractive just as, in the case of my current relationship, she made it clear from the outset that she was interested in me.

Your flagrant disregard for what men want makes you sound like a very entitled individual.  What value do you believe you could bring to a relationship with an attitide like that?  

Yes I'm sorry. I'm in a relationship and I don't feel that attitude at all. This man didn't like me. I liked this guy but he didn't reciprocate. He spent 7 years harassing me to change me to fit what he would see as acceptable. I have a therapy appointment tomorrow and I have to find out why I allowed myself to be in that situation for so long. It did affect me and I was really upset when I wrote the post. Sorry! I don't even like the guy at all. I just don't understand why I wasn't just rejected. I'm a little damaged from it. 

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Trail Blazer
1 minute ago, Realitysux said:

Yes I'm sorry. I'm in a relationship and I don't feel that attitude at all. This man didn't like me. I liked this guy but he didn't reciprocate. He spent 7 years harassing me to change me to fit what he would see as acceptable. I have a therapy appointment tomorrow and I have to find out why I allowed myself to be in that situation for so long. It did affect me and I was really upset when I wrote the post. Sorry!

My subsequent reading uncovered more of your posts throughout this thread.  I am sorry that you've been hurt and wish you all the best with your recovery.  Don't be a prisoner of your past.  There are still a lot of good men out there.  

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On 3/27/2020 at 4:51 PM, alphamale said:

a sense of humour....but finding that quality in a female is like trying to find a needle in a haystack

Really? Me and my friends are hysterical! Honestly, I think people on first dates are just so nervous that sometimes their sense of humor gets hidden by their anxiety. I am a great first date, always trying to make jokes, and sometimes it works, sometimes it doesn't. Do you make women laugh on dates? 

Edited by Malin889
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