Dating younger men vs older men

[Azincourt]

7 minutes ago, basil67 said:

Why the frequent references to Hollywood people @Azincourt?    Personally, I can't see the appeal.  

The very first movie I saw at the cinema was Interview With The Vampire with Brad Pitt and Tom Cruise.

I remember being there and telling myself how gorgeous Brad Pitt and everything about the movie was. 

I reckon that Brad Pitt was my introduction to ''the ideal male beauty,'' and over the years I fell in love with the movies. Going all the way back to the Golden Age of Hollywood with all of those gorgeous people, and their perfect white teeth. I've always wondered if they were natural of if there was some dentistry magic involved.

Celebs represent an aspiration to me.  The talent, the beauty, the charm. The lifestyle. The hundreds of millions they win, and the access they have to the most beautiful women the world has ever seen.

They've also achieved eternal youth. You put Red River playing on the DVD, and you watch a young Montgomery Clift, when Elisabeth Taylor was in love with him. He's not middle-aged, he's not an alcohloic, he hasn't lost his looks yet. He's perfect, and he's young forever because of the movies that will never vanish from the collective imagination.

Between being the King of England and being an Hollywood star, I know what I would choose, and my choice wouldn't be hard to make.

Edited April 2, 2020 by Azincourt

[basil67]

The beauty is fake and the charm is devised by publicists.   Remember when Tom Cruise dumped his publicist and the real Tom came out?    More broadly, there are the drugs, the rehabs, the alcohol, the lack of privacy.   Doesn't sound great to me.   But I guess I've also always had a thing for men who aren't fake.

[Emilie Jolie]

14 hours ago, Azincourt said:

no interest in having biological children, adopting children, or in raising someone else's children.

I also like living alone, and there's many women who want something serious even if it doesn't lead to marriage.

Your dating window seems very small; no kids or dealing with kids, no commitment, no cohabitation, no comingling finances...No wonder it doesn't last with any woman of any age. 

Brad Pitt is single too, by the way. Just saying

[Malin889]

I am in my early 40s. Ideally, I would love to date a guy who is only a few years older than me or older, but life doesn’t always work out the way you want and age to me doesn’t matter too much, it’s all about maturity. And honestly, with online dating where everyone knows your age, I’ve gotten more guys who are interested in their mid to late 30s and 40s, and less guys in their 50s, even though I put my filter up to 54-55. I find this to be very interesting. I don’t know if guys in their 50s are looking for women younger than me or what. 

[Kballer]

I predominantly date women younger than me.. It's not that I seek them out, it's just that they seem to be attracted to me and I to them. What I find is that younger women lack faith in guys their age. What I hear most is "they just want to play video games all day/night", or, "they have no ambition or life goals'.  Most women feel that younger guys are less likely to commit to a serious relationship-whether that is factually accurate or not, that's what I'm told. I'm also "young at heart" so I certainly don't act my age, or hang out with, or associate with people my age regularly. I went to Ultra Fest last year, and also EDC in Las Vegas.. These are not things that people "my age" are supposed to do.. But I LOVE that lifestyle. I'm deep into the EDM scene. It just comes with the territory that younger females are as well.  I just have a much better vibe with people who are still enamored with the fascination of life.. I find that younger women have no qualms smiling throughout the day, and just have a happier outlook on life. A lot of-BUT NOT ALL-people my age are just locked into their career, or families, or social status. I find that younger women (mid 20's on up to about mid 30's) are not yet disillusioned with life, or jaded. Just my personal observation. A lot of women I've met in their early 40's are just not happy in life. The ones I've met that are happy-are usually married and settled so that does not help me in the dating category! 🙂  Again, what I've said above may not apply to you, or your situation, just what I've personally observed. I find a LOT of younger women are interested in me... I'm just looking for the "right" one regardless of her age..

[stillafool]

On 4/2/2020 at 6:25 PM, Azincourt said:

watch a young Montgomery Clift, when Elisabeth Taylor was in love with him.

Elizabeth Taylor was never in love with Monty, he was her best friend and also gay.  You are talking about characters they played in movies.

[Interstellar]

You want to see smooth? Watch Cary Grant in His Girl Friday.

And watch how he banters.

Edited April 4, 2020 by Interstellar

[smackie9]

I never dated anyone over the age of 25. When I turned 24 I started dating guys younger than me, but no younger than 19 (drinking age). If I was single again, I would most likely date younger, like around 12 years younger maybe more depending on the situation.

[Ami1uwant]

On 4/1/2020 at 12:08 AM, Letschill said:

I'm a middle aged guy in his 40's. I date women of all ages. But I hear complaints from women that they aren't attracted to younger guys. I also Have younger male friends who tellme they have difficulty dating, Ladies, what is the difference in the 2 age groups? You're the ones who decide what you like. 

 

At this point it depends on what you want and where you are in your life.

When you say younger are you saying the women aren’t cougars vs a 35 yr old woman would date men 34-42 for examp,r?

 

with women in their mid to late 30s ..(1) do they want kids (3) do they have kids already. A woman wanting or open to have kids will want kids right away in the marriage.  If they date younger the guy likely doesn’t want to go to marriage and then kids,

 

with older women at say 40 or older where new children is out of the equation a factor in play is where you are with kids.  For examp,e if one has kiids aboutto go to college and the other has kids under 10 the timing is off where one was looking forward to life without parent responsibility.

 

with a woman late 40s and kids are pastcollege there may be a lifestyle they want yo maintain and are planning for retirement. While someone 30s isn’t looking at that at all.

 

but women married and 35-40 also likely has an income lifestyle they want yo maintain. If their ex made 6 figure income then that will be what she is looking for.

 

[elaine567]

On 4/1/2020 at 5:08 AM, Letschill said:

I'm a middle aged guy in his 40's. I date women of all ages. But I hear complaints from women that they aren't attracted to younger guys. I also Have younger male friends who tellme they have difficulty dating, Ladies, what is the difference in the 2 age groups? You're the ones who decide what you like. 

OK but as you are an "older" guy then it would be pretty tactless of them to tell you they are very attracted to younger guys... 
 and some younger guys always have a struggle dating.
It doesn't mean "women" in general have suddenly developed a taste for older guys.
Some women are attracted to older guys some aren't.
Most "cllck" with people they have most in common with and that usually means people round about their own age.

 

[stillafool]

2 hours ago, elaine567 said:

It doesn't mean "women" in general have suddenly developed a taste for older guys.

Actually I'm seeing older women developing a taste for younger guys or always had it and now aren't afraid to act on it.

[elaine567]

There is a culture of youth, so I am not surprised that some men and women are looking to date younger individuals.
Women often don't now NEED a man to subsidise their lives, so they can now afford to go where their attraction lies as opposed to "following the money".
There are also a whole tier of young men with "potential" and some women would rather date a young guy who is going to be rich, than date an old guy. 
Of course poorer women may not have the luxury of that choice, so are always on the market to date older "richer" guys. 

[simpycurious]

5 hours ago, stillafool said:

Actually I'm seeing older women developing a taste for younger guys or always had it and now aren't afraid to act on it.

It really is Still especially one's that stoked and wealthy...lol.  I have been kinda shocked at how bold some of these OLDER women can be.  We have a term for it but it would construed as somewhat crude so I won't share it.  

[Emilie Jolie]

We care less about social conventions and what 'the done thing' is now, or maybe social expectations have shifted. All things being equal, people now have the luxury to enter RLs with whoever they're attracted to, or whoever they can attract no matter the gender. And that's pretty cool in itself.

Edited April 5, 2020 by Emilie Jolie

[Piddy]

Some younger women are attracted to older men for whatever reason.  I saw it at my former golf club where I was a member.  One guy had a much younger wife (like 20 plus years) and they used to get a kick out of going out and acting like a father daughter relationship and then give a passionate kiss and shock people.  I think anything goes these days. 

I also remember at the same course a waitress we knew in the restaurant saying she and her friends dated older men.  I asked her how old?  She said my age.  This was several years ago when I was in my 50's and she was in her 20's.

Edited April 5, 2020 by Piddy

[poppyfields]

On 4/1/2020 at 5:32 AM, Interstellar said:

Younger women like older men who don’t look old. Someone who takes good care of themselves and  not narcissistic.

For example, a 50 year old guy who has the  body and face of a 30 year old, etc..

Yeah, that's me!  My bf is 15 years older, in his 40s, hot and fit, looks better than he did in his 20s!  No joke.

We also have a great sex life, he's stable, good job, makes good money (as do I).

I really dislike such broad generalizations, judge each person individually, no matter how old, young, tall, short, or whatever else. 

 

Edited April 5, 2020 by poppyfields

[Woggle]

Every man and every woman is different in who they are and are not attracted to. People are individuals. I think many people of both genders use threads like this to push their grudge against the opposite sex.

Edited April 5, 2020 by Woggle

[simpycurious]

2 hours ago, Piddy said:

Some younger women are attracted to older men for whatever reason.  I saw it at my former golf club where I was a member.  One guy had a much younger wife (like 20 plus years) and they used to get a kick out of going out and acting like a father daughter relationship and then give a passionate kiss and shock people.  I think anything goes these days. 

I also remember at the same course a waitress we knew in the restaurant saying she and her friends dated older men.  I asked her how old?  She said my age.  This was several years ago when I was in my 50's and she was in her 20's.

At our club, it is amazing how many older women TRY to attract younger dudes. I mean LARGE age differences. Of course, there are wealthy older men with what others call "trophy wives" who are much younger.  I suppose all of this is AGELESS in terms of how it goes on (both directions).  I will also say I see ZERO social distancing at these private clubs.  I mean solitary carts, no caddies, no touching the flag sticks, etc but I mean LOTS of people out and about. I am guilty of it as well 

I am NOT condoning it of course.....at least way out in the lake or the Gulf you are SERIOUSLY social distancing.

 

 

Edited April 5, 2020 by simpycurious

[stillafool]

5 hours ago, simpycurious said:

It really is Still especially one's that stoked and wealthy...lol.  I have been kinda shocked at how bold some of these OLDER women can be.  We have a term for it but it would construed as somewhat crude so I won't share it.  

Well you obviously travel in a different circle because I'm seeing regular (not particularly wealthy) older women going for younger men.  I certainly understand the term you're referring to as it sounds like what my friends and I called older men and it wasn't very nice either.  But, we learn to accept people's choices if it's legal and not hurting anyone.  We grow.

[Cookiesandough]

On 4/5/2020 at 6:10 PM, simpycurious said:

At our club, it is amazing how many older women TRY to attract younger dudes. I mean LARGE age differences. Of course, there are wealthy older men with what others call "trophy wives" who are much younger.  I suppose all of this is AGELESS in terms of how it goes on (both directions).  I will also say I see ZERO social distancing at these private clubs.  I mean solitary carts, no caddies, no touching the flag sticks, etc but I mean LOTS of people out and about. I am guilty of it as well 

I am NOT condoning it of course.....at least way out in the lake or the Gulf you are SERIOUSLY social distancing.

 

 

Wow, is that a clandestine club or do you guys just not have the social distancing rules in place yet? Our governor has banned all non essential gatherings and we have a stay at home order. Guess you’re lucky enough to live in a place you don’t have that 

 

Staying on topic... why am I not surprised you are cougar bait, simpy 😊

[simpycurious]

1 hour ago, Cookiesandough said:

Wow, is that a clandestine club or do you guys just not have the social distancing rules in place yet? Our governor has banned all non essential gatherings and we have a stay at home order. Guess you’re lucky enough to live in a place you don’t have that 

 

Staying on topic... why am I not surprised you are cougar bait, simpy 😊

Yeah, we are fortunate to be able to move around and have SOME normalize.  You would LOVE IT Cookie.  Staying on topic...any man would be lucky to date YOU

[CaliforniaGirl]

I'm a woman in my 50s. 40 would probably be my lower limit, 60 very upper limit.

[hotpotato]

On 4/1/2020 at 4:58 AM, Emilie Jolie said:

A friend of mine has been in a happy relationship with a guy 12 years younger for 4 years. I'm in my 40s. My dating range is no less than 5 years, mainly because I generally don't find 20s to mid 30s men attractive, with the odd outlier. 

That's the paradox of heterosexual life; men age way better than women, women mature way better than men.

Oh I disagree. Men do not age better than women. Maybe in their minds they do. Men have great self esteem. 

I'd be open to dating younger men and older men if I were dating. Some older men look good, but that's an exception. Some younger guys make good money. 

I dont find younger men unattractive at all! 

 

[elaine567]

8 minutes ago, hotpotato said:

Men do not age better than women.

I agree. Same grey hair, same wrinkles, same flabby skin, same "older" shapes, same inflexible thinking, same grouchiness/bitterness.
The problem is that women are "supposed" to look and act about 20 for life and men are allowed to look and act about 50.
If we put the same unrealistic expectations onto men, then how many of them would meet that remit? How many older men would pass for 20?
They age well as looking about 50 is considered OK by society...

[thefooloftheyear]

The iss

47 minutes ago, elaine567 said:

I agree. Same grey hair, same wrinkles, same flabby skin, same "older" shapes, same inflexible thinking, same grouchiness/bitterness.
The problem is that women are "supposed" to look and act about 20 for life and men are allowed to look and act about 50.
If we put the same unrealistic expectations onto men, then how many of them would meet that remit? How many older men would pass for 20?
They age well as looking about 50 is considered OK by society...

This is generally true...Its WAY harder to have/maintain a "good" appearance of what is expected of women...

I do think men have an advantage in the area of weight gain/control and general physique condition...The level some women need to go to maintain a slim/sexy body at an advanced age are almost superhuman for many/most  women....while I have seen and known a good amount of older men that if they just give up some carbs/junk /beer and hit a gym a few times a week can do it relatively easy...

TFY