Letschill Posted April 6, 2020 Share Posted April 6, 2020 I see women complain all the time about why they are tired of their men they date being jerks. But they keep dating them. Is there something to this? Do women just like to argue with jerks and everything? Link to post Share on other sites
littleblackheart Posted April 6, 2020 Share Posted April 6, 2020 No. 6 Link to post Share on other sites
RecentChange Posted April 6, 2020 Share Posted April 6, 2020 Mentally healthy women who haven't experienced abuse or abandonment during their formative years do not seek drama or jerks. But unfortunately many people haven't been raised in ways that allow them to form healthy relationships. So they can get into self sabatoge situations where they cling to abusive or "jerky" men, create drama etc. Is it because it's what they WANT? Rarely. Is it because they do not recognize how their subconscious is leading to bad decisions? Most likely. 9 3 Link to post Share on other sites
Juha Posted April 6, 2020 Share Posted April 6, 2020 Some do The intelligent ones learn from their mistakes of getting burned, some do not and keep repeating the pattern 1 Link to post Share on other sites
preraph Posted April 6, 2020 Share Posted April 6, 2020 I like a little drama, but not from someone being a jerk. I like some passion and flair, don't mind a little cockiness. 5 1 Link to post Share on other sites
elaine567 Posted April 6, 2020 Share Posted April 6, 2020 3 minutes ago, Juha said: Some do The intelligent ones learn from their mistakes of getting burned, some do not and keep repeating the pattern I am not sure if intelligence has much to do with it. Some very intelligent people lurch from one bad relationship to the next. I think it is more about upbringing than intelligence. 9 1 Link to post Share on other sites
Emilie Jolie Posted April 6, 2020 Share Posted April 6, 2020 (edited) I notice an overarching trend in all your recent threads about 'women', letschill. I've noted 2 things: 1. you like sweeping generic statements. A lot. 2. You don't seem to look at 'women' in a positive light. Can you confirm? Edited April 6, 2020 by Emilie Jolie 4 3 1 Link to post Share on other sites
basil67 Posted April 6, 2020 Share Posted April 6, 2020 Are you having problems dating? I can't figure out if you need assistance or just want to whine about women. 3 2 Link to post Share on other sites
preraph Posted April 7, 2020 Share Posted April 7, 2020 OP, just because women are dating them doesn't make them jerks. 4 Link to post Share on other sites
Cookiesandough Posted April 7, 2020 Share Posted April 7, 2020 (edited) 37 minutes ago, preraph said: I like a little drama, but not from someone being a jerk. I like some passion and flair, don't mind a little cockiness. Same!!! Don’t make it too easy. Just a little to keep you on your toes. Edited April 7, 2020 by Cookiesandough 3 Link to post Share on other sites
simpycurious Posted April 7, 2020 Share Posted April 7, 2020 26 minutes ago, basil67 said: Are you having problems dating? I can't figure out if you need assistance or just want to whine about women. Doesn't A LITTLE DRAMA add a little spice? Being a little spunky, opinionated, a touch of diva are truly not bad things in a woman. BORING STINKS just an FYI as well as someone with NO opinion. 2 1 Link to post Share on other sites
preraph Posted April 7, 2020 Share Posted April 7, 2020 Well apparently I do like that while at the same time it can make me miserable. But I like dramatic gestures. Like my lifelong crush disappeared for two years to California. Walked into a club and there he was and it was like tunnel vision staring at each other, and then he came up and kissed my hand. He thought I was with this guy from work that I left my bottle with when I came in. So when I was standing up talking to him he came up and ignored that the guy was there, so I introduced them. crush was with a woman who was sitting upstairs he said. We all hit the dance floor, and it was just me and the crush staring at each other over the shoulders of our dance partners. Honestly it was just one of my very favorite memories. 1 1 Link to post Share on other sites
simpycurious Posted April 7, 2020 Share Posted April 7, 2020 1 minute ago, preraph said: Well apparently I do like that while at the same time it can make me miserable. But I like dramatic gestures. Like my lifelong crush disappeared for two years to California. Walked into a club and there he was and it was like tunnel vision staring at each other, and then he came up and kissed my hand. He thought I was with this guy from work that I left my bottle with when I came in. So when I was standing up talking to him he came up and ignored that the guy was there, so I introduced them. crush was with a woman who was sitting upstairs he said. We all hit the dance floor, and it was just me and the crush staring at each other over the shoulders of our dance partners. Honestly it was just one of my very favorite memories. Could he dance? Or was he super stiff with zero swag? What's with the kissing of the hand? 1 Link to post Share on other sites
basil67 Posted April 7, 2020 Share Posted April 7, 2020 (edited) @simpycurious Hubby and I thrive in an environment of fun and laughs backed up by mutual respect and a calm atmosphere. A guy who's into drama wouldn't last long at all with me. Edited April 7, 2020 by basil67 1 2 Link to post Share on other sites
preraph Posted April 7, 2020 Share Posted April 7, 2020 (edited) Oh Lord, he was all good looks and swag. He was blessed. I'm not the best dancer but he and I danced well together. He kissed my hand every time I saw him for years. And no he didn't kiss other woman's hands, and yes he would do it right in front of his dates. Edited April 7, 2020 by preraph 1 Link to post Share on other sites
simpycurious Posted April 7, 2020 Share Posted April 7, 2020 2 minutes ago, basil67 said: @simpycurious Hubby and I thrive in an environment of fun and laughs backed up by mutual respect and a calm atmosphere. A guy who's into drama wouldn't last long at all with me. I get that Basil. I am light hearted and ALWAYS like to laugh and have fun. I am not talking about CRAZY NUT JOB drama just a little here in there can actually spice things up. No guy that I know enjoys a woman who is a conformist. Hey, everyone prefers something different but I am not meek and mild. 2 Link to post Share on other sites
simpycurious Posted April 7, 2020 Share Posted April 7, 2020 6 minutes ago, preraph said: Oh Lord, he was all good looks and swag. He was blessed. I'm not the best dancer but he and I danced well together. He kissed my hand every time I saw him for years. And no he didn't kiss other woman's hands, and yes he would do it right in front of his dates. I expected nothing less from you Preraph. He was a "smooth operator" evidently. I could tell you about a man's athletic prowess and how equates to dancing but you probably already know about it. Link to post Share on other sites
basil67 Posted April 7, 2020 Share Posted April 7, 2020 11 minutes ago, simpycurious said: I get that Basil. I am light hearted and ALWAYS like to laugh and have fun. I am not talking about CRAZY NUT JOB drama just a little here in there can actually spice things up. No guy that I know enjoys a woman who is a conformist. Hey, everyone prefers something different but I am not meek and mild. Sure. Nobody would call me meek and mild either. And hubby and his friends have all married women who stand up to them when need be. And they stand up to us when need be. But none of we women would ever be accused of making drama or being divas. We're all quite down to earth. Meanwhile one of my friends, while not a NUT JOB, can create drama at home with her insecurities and other issues and my hubby doesn't know how her hubby puts up with it. I guess it's horses for courses. 1 Link to post Share on other sites
preraph Posted April 7, 2020 Share Posted April 7, 2020 16 minutes ago, simpycurious said: I expected nothing less from you Preraph. He was a "smooth operator" evidently. I could tell you about a man's athletic prowess and how equates to dancing but you probably already know about it. Feel free! Link to post Share on other sites
2BGoodAgain Posted April 7, 2020 Share Posted April 7, 2020 no. but then again, beware of women who talk about how they dislike drama, but somehow seem to be surrounded in it. same thing about women/men who talk about how money isn't important to them or that they would never lie... people who are (place a characteristic here) don't have to talk about it... they simply are... 2 Link to post Share on other sites
simpycurious Posted April 7, 2020 Share Posted April 7, 2020 2 hours ago, Cookiesandough said: Same!!! Don’t make it too easy. Just a little to keep you on your toes. I am CERTAIN that you can keep any MAN on his toes and that it would be quite the ride. 1 Link to post Share on other sites
basil67 Posted April 7, 2020 Share Posted April 7, 2020 1 hour ago, 2BGoodAgain said: no. but then again, beware of women who talk about how they dislike drama, but somehow seem to be surrounded in it. Which just goes back to what the OP asked about. I used to have friend who was like this. She was always emotionally messy, never 'ready to date', would complain that "all men are bas....." and then find yet another drama filled relationship. Or non-relationship. The rest of us would find good guys and she would instinctively hone in on drama. There's a reason that she's no longer a friend. Too much drama all around. 1 Link to post Share on other sites
simpycurious Posted April 7, 2020 Share Posted April 7, 2020 1 hour ago, basil67 said: Which just goes back to what the OP asked about. I used to have friend who was like this. She was always emotionally messy, never 'ready to date', would complain that "all men are bas....." and then find yet another drama filled relationship. Or non-relationship. The rest of us would find good guys and she would instinctively hone in on drama. There's a reason that she's no longer a friend. Too much drama all around. That's a different level of drama............. Link to post Share on other sites
Mrin Posted April 7, 2020 Share Posted April 7, 2020 Me: you know, I like a woman with a bit of fire to her... Unpredictability. Ya good stuff right there. Many women I've dated: hold my beer... Sorry that was too easy. That being said, I do like a bit of fire in a lady. I really do. Keeps me on my toes and keeps things interesting. 1 Link to post Share on other sites
Emilie Jolie Posted April 7, 2020 Share Posted April 7, 2020 9 hours ago, elaine567 said: I think it is more about upbringing than intelligence I had a lovely upbringing in a stable, loving, happy family and I want to believe I'm not an idiot. I'm also secure in myself most of the time. I still got into a couple of 'bad decisions' RLs in my younger days because my upbringing didn't prepare me to deal with unstable guys. I was not equipped to recognise jerks quickly. So yes to 'upbringing', but not necessarily a bad one. 6 Link to post Share on other sites
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