StevenJo99 Posted April 18, 2020 Share Posted April 18, 2020 So, I met a girl 14 months, and we were attracted to each other but she was already in a relationship. So, she left her ex to get into a relationship with me.. It was fine at the beginning for 4 months till her ex enrolled the place we work in. I know her ex actually, he is a friend of mine (not close friends), but when we saw him he looked devastated from the breakup and he started approaching her trying to get things back. I told her that the only solution was that we tell him everything so he won't do any harm. She refused and said that he's very attached to her as they were in relationship for 4 years. So I broke up with her till she solves her problems with him. a month later she came back to me and said that I should not worry about them talking and she will only talk to him as a friend and I should not be jealous. I agreed, as a matter of fact I wasn't jealous, instead I was looking at him as threat to the relationship. One day we had an argument about her chatting with her ex for long time and I broke up with her, she tried very hard to get me back (she was calling her friends to tell me to get back and I was refusing), and convinced me that she will never talk to him again and I agreed. a month later she broke up with me saying that I made her look bad in front of her friends and that I humiliated her, and one of her friends told me that the day before she broke up with you she saw her ex hanging out with some girl and she got jealous and face turned yellow.. when I knew this, I went to her ex and explained him everything. Then we were not in a relationship for 2 months, during these 2 months she was chatting with me and with her ex a lot to a way that I felt like she was in love with both of us. So I told her that I won't talk to her and this chapter of my life is over. Later on I was talking to her because we work together but her ex told me that they were back and that I should not talk to her a lot. I told him it's okay, I will try as much as I can to avoid contacting her and told him not worry and I'll never be a threat to you and it was all okay. When he told me that they were back it was kind of shocking but okay I thought that what we had was a rebound and this chapter is really ended and there is nothing to do so I have to move on. Two weeks later, she started to contact me and told me everything that happened the past month. She said that they came back together but she felt that she doesn't love him anymore and couldn't be with him so she broke up with him and told him to stay away. She came to me telling me that she realizes her mistakes and that she should've blocked any contact with him from the beginning and she'll do this now and now she wants back. She wants me to be forgiving but part of me doesn't actually believe she loves me so I told her if we are to be in a relationship it can't be right now. We have to rest from the troubles we got into and see if we can still do this. She said that she won't contact me again and will remove every memory she has with me and won't waste my time etc. I told her the truth right away that I love her but I don't believe she loves me and I don't want to get in a relationship in which I'm worried about my partner's feelings towards me. Should I actually come back? I'm that kind of a person that wants things to be real and intimate and want the relationship to last my entire life. Link to post Share on other sites
Mystery4u Posted April 19, 2020 Share Posted April 19, 2020 3 hours ago, StevenJo99 said: Should I actually come back? I'm that kind of a person that wants things to be real and intimate and want the relationship to last my entire life. Read this sentence again. Then read your whole opening post again. How many times have you broken up, got back together, she switched to you, to her ex, to you, to her ex etc etc etc. You don't need us to confirm what you already know. But I'll say it anyway. NO you should not go back. An ex is an ex for a reason. She is just one woman out of billions. Move on and find someone without all the ex baggage who you can have exactly what you want with - a relationship that lasts. 1 Link to post Share on other sites
Marc878 Posted April 19, 2020 Share Posted April 19, 2020 Nope she’s not with all the drama besides she’ll probably do it again. how'd you like going through it before? Link to post Share on other sites
schlumpy Posted April 19, 2020 Share Posted April 19, 2020 I think you are reading the situation right. Your feelings for her are stronger which will always put you at a disadvantage as she uses you as a placeholder until her true love appears. 1 Link to post Share on other sites
lolablue17 Posted April 19, 2020 Share Posted April 19, 2020 If you take her back, there is about 0.00001% chance that it will hold for more than 2-3 months, weeks, days... So you should deside according to that factual assumptiuon 🙂 Link to post Share on other sites
TeddyBundy1993 Posted April 20, 2020 Share Posted April 20, 2020 Normally when you are being left for someone and then person returns back to you. One should never take him/her back. Unless theres a huge change or due to some exceptions. I'd say from my experience this women is not worth second if you are looking for a long shot. She left her ex for you then you for him now returned. A long term relationship comes with extreme issues, she will be a big disappointment. Most probably leave you for someone new. Dont fall for it. You'll save yourself more ugly heartbreak in future and a hell lot of drama. Stay away keep conversation professional nothing beyond that... if you dont wanna suffer in future Link to post Share on other sites
lonelyplanetmoon Posted April 23, 2020 Share Posted April 23, 2020 On 4/19/2020 at 4:43 PM, lolablue17 said: factual assumptiuon 🙂 Factual assumptions, huh? Gotta get me some of those! Lol. good one made me laugh. Link to post Share on other sites
Sinful Posted April 23, 2020 Share Posted April 23, 2020 On 4/18/2020 at 5:07 PM, StevenJo99 said: Should I actually come back? I'm that kind of a person that wants things to be real and intimate and want the relationship to last my entire life. No, you shouldn't take her back. She's just playing the both of you IMO. I don't know how old she is but she seems really immature bouncing back and forth between the two of you like that. It's like she gets bored or has a fight with one and then runs back to the other. Don't fall for the BS, look at her actions. Link to post Share on other sites
JTSW Posted April 25, 2020 Share Posted April 25, 2020 No. She doesn't love you. She'll just keep going back n forth between you and her ex. Link to post Share on other sites
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