dangerous Posted April 19, 2020 Share Posted April 19, 2020 I've connected with a lady online and we've got on very well. We swapped phone numbers and texted for about a week, then switched to phone calls: every day for the last week and the calls are quite long (around an hour) because we are enjoying the calls. We like each-others photos and have a lot in common. Also we live local, only 20 minutes drive. We are both serious about social distancing and we discussed probably not meeting until official lockdown is relaxed. However we did discuss the idea of a walk in the park. We both agreed it was t think about but neither of us pushed it yet. On the phone yesterday, she mentioned to me that she had been cycling with a local friend. Also later that day, a couple of friends called at her house and came in for a chat and cuppa (in theory observing social distancing, separate cups etc.) So bearing in mind that she is cycling and meeting her local friends, I am feeling slightly offended that she hasn't revisited or suggested the outdoors meeting with me. TBH its made me rethink that maybe the intensity/regularity of our phonecalls this last week have been too much and she's not as into me as she's led me to believe. Additionally, although we talked a lot last night, today she's been obviously quiet. (I was the first to send her a text today at 2pm, she responded with a short reply but hasn't followed up, even to ask how I am and the day is now over.) The way I feel today is that the momentum has switched off, and I'm not motivated to text/call so much. I'm surprised at how quickly the vibe has changed, it did feel much better than usual up to this point. Link to post Share on other sites
Foxhall Posted April 19, 2020 Share Posted April 19, 2020 Yes id push ahead with the date now or try to secure the date, no point wasting energy on endless calls- see is there anything present in-person follow up when the iron is hot, 20 minutes apart - you can sidestep the lockdown this time, 1 Link to post Share on other sites
Author dangerous Posted April 20, 2020 Author Share Posted April 20, 2020 Yes I think progressing to an outdoor meet/date is the way forward BUT I confess that since we've only sent a short single message yesterday, I am immediately feeling distant. I know its game-playing but both of us now are not reaching out, we are both waiting for the other to make the first move, it's crazy! I certainly don't feel like asking her out until there is some warmer communication, if indeed it returns at all. I'm going to send her a "how are you?" type message now and see what happens. Link to post Share on other sites
elaine567 Posted April 20, 2020 Share Posted April 20, 2020 The difference is she can trust her friends. She has probably known them a long time and knows if they thought they had the virus or were a risk to her they would tell her. She trusts them. Her friends are not going to want to get close either. She doesn't really know you enough to trust you and probably feels you would put her under pressure regarding physical contact and that is not "social distancing". A 20 minute drive to "meet up" isn't even allowed during lock down in the UK? Why put her and yourself at risk? 2 Link to post Share on other sites
Author dangerous Posted April 20, 2020 Author Share Posted April 20, 2020 1 minute ago, elaine567 said: The difference is she can trust her friends. She has probably known them a long time and knows if they thought they had the virus or were a risk to her they would tell her. She trusts them. Her friends are not going to want to get close either. She doesn't really know you enough to trust you and probably feels you would put her under pressure regarding physical contact and that is not "social distancing". A 20 minute drive to "meet up" isn't even allowed during lock down in the UK? Why put her and yourself at risk? Great point about the trust thing. And yes that's the way I have felt: strictly observing the lockdown.... but I just wonder whether I am being too diligent? That was my main reason for posting here to get other posters' views. Thanks for yours Accepting that, the long term texting/phoning is running out of steam, but I suppose that is likely to happen in these strange times Anyway, I've sent the text so we'll see what occurs today. Link to post Share on other sites
texasgreeneyes Posted April 21, 2020 Share Posted April 21, 2020 What ended up happening after your text yesterday OP?! 😀 Link to post Share on other sites
Author dangerous Posted April 23, 2020 Author Share Posted April 23, 2020 (edited) On 4/21/2020 at 10:30 PM, texasgreeneyes said: What ended up happening after your text yesterday OP?! 😀 yes, she replied promptly, and we had a call, two days in a row, but its the same as before running out of steam. I think I just need to let it wind down and go cool for a while and when going out resumes, then we can get in contact and see how we both feel. Risk we'll lose the chance, but hey, that's just life (and online dating!) at the moment. Edited April 23, 2020 by dangerous Link to post Share on other sites
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