I sent pictures of someone else to a girl who has now fallen in love with me and wants to meet me in person

[preraph]

We'll just go ahead and keep deluding yourself. Looks matters and so does lying. 

[ExpatInItaly]

Yo know what, OP?

Maybe it's better if you don't meet this woman, and just end it and leave her alone forever. The more you write, the more obvious it is that you lack even basic respect and social skills and you don't know how to treat people right. Your thinking about all of this is just do warped and troubling that you are bound to do her more harm than good even if you finally stopped wussing around and met her. 

She deserves better than what you can offer. Sorry. 

[thomas131313]

35 minutes ago, ExpatInItaly said:

Yo know what, OP?

Maybe it's better if you don't meet this woman, and just end it and leave her alone forever. The more you write, the more obvious it is that you lack even basic respect and social skills and you don't know how to treat people right. Your thinking about all of this is just do warped and troubling that you are bound to do her more harm than good even if you finally stopped wussing around and met her. 

She deserves better than what you can offer. Sorry. 

I dont think she would have stayed around this long if i didnt know how to respect people or treat them right

[thomas131313]

42 minutes ago, ExpatInItaly said:

Yo know what, OP?

Maybe it's better if you don't meet this woman, and just end it and leave her alone forever. The more you write, the more obvious it is that you lack even basic respect and social skills and you don't know how to treat people right. Your thinking about all of this is just do warped and troubling that you are bound to do her more harm than good even if you finally stopped wussing around and met her. 

She deserves better than what you can offer. Sorry. 

shes putting more pressure on me today to go on cam than any other time. maybe the universe is listening and shes getting the message

[ExpatInItaly]

21 minutes ago, thomas131313 said:

shes putting more pressure on me today to go on cam than any other time. maybe the universe is listening and shes getting the message

Huh?

It should be you that is getting the message. 

And she sticks around because she's not mentally balanced either; she doesn't get that you aren't treating her right because she doesn't know you're lying to her and she doesn't have mature emotional intelligence. You're playing with fire by toying with this woman's emotions. 

[ShyViolet]

10 hours ago, thomas131313 said:

shes putting more pressure on me today to go on cam than any other time. maybe the universe is listening and shes getting the message

Go on the cam!!  Let her see you!!

[preraph]

12 hours ago, thomas131313 said:

I dont think she would have stayed around this long if i didnt know how to respect people or treat them right

That's nuts in light of how you've been lying and deceiving this woman and about to hurt her and destroy her trust forever in mankind.

[thomas131313]

4 hours ago, preraph said:

That's nuts in light of how you've been lying and deceiving this woman and about to hurt her and destroy her trust forever in mankind.

the one thing that doesnt make sense is that she has shown me all the people she has been with and they have been been good looking or very good looking so why would she make some kind of exception for me unless there was a genuine connection since she has access to these other people. i guess also most of them wanted to sleep with her instead of actually be with her

[BaileyB]

10 minutes ago, thomas131313 said:

the one thing that doesnt make sense is that she has shown me all the people she has been with and they have been been good looking or very good looking so why would she make some kind of exception for me unless there was a genuine connection since she has access to these other people. 

Are you really that insecure?

[preraph]

11 minutes ago, thomas131313 said:

the one thing that doesnt make sense is that she has shown me all the people she has been with and they have been been good looking or very good looking so why would she make some kind of exception for me unless there was a genuine connection since she has access to these other people. i guess also most of them wanted to sleep with her instead of actually be with her

She won't make an exception for you.

[thomas131313]

Just now, preraph said:

She won't make an exception for you.

You misunderstood what i said. she already made an exception as in why is she talking to me now when she had access to all these other people?

[preraph]

She thinks you are this good-looking guy. She hasn't made an exception for you. She is starting to suspect that you are a catfish however.

[thomas131313]

Just now, preraph said:

She thinks you are this good-looking guy. She hasn't made an exception for you. She is starting to suspect that you are a catfish however.

You dont understand the situation. she has waited around for 4 months when she could have found some other good looking guy, why is she waiting around in this situation when she doesnt want it, well besides she says its cause she loves me. how has she not made an exception for me? the exception she is making is the fact i havent met her and she doesnt want this yet shes still here. thats a pretty big exception. why didnt she just go find another guy already?

[BaileyB]

23 minutes ago, thomas131313 said:

You dont understand the situation. she has waited around for 4 months when she could have found some other good looking guy, why is she waiting around in this situation. shes still here. why didnt she just go find another guy already?

That’s a really good question. Many women would have been long gone... happy to be single perhaps, or meeting/dating other men, long given up on this...

[LynneVicious]

...and the problem with lying about your pics. 
 

Is when someone like her connects with someone and fantasizes about the future with them, along with their hundreds of hours of conversation, they put your face to go along with it. 
 

So everytime she talks to you, she pictures your face... Everytime she talks about you, she pictures your face. Everytime she thinks about the future and fantasizes about your relationship, she thinks of your face...

 

The face that you lied to her about. That’s the problem. She has this whole fantasy built up based on a lie. And before you counter with, “well, she said she’d love me if I were someone else...”, I am telling you exactly how it is. 
 

Now, you may get lucky. And meet and she likes you all the same. Maybe not. But you are dead wrong in deceiving her into thinking you’re someone who you are not and even admit she started talking with you because of the false pics. 
 

If you want any chance at all of a relationship with her, you tell her the truth. Orherwise, you carry on with this fantasy pen pal situation and waste both of your time. 

[preraph]

36 minutes ago, thomas131313 said:

You dont understand the situation. she has waited around for 4 months when she could have found some other good looking guy, why is she waiting around in this situation when she doesnt want it, well besides she says its cause she loves me. how has she not made an exception for me? the exception she is making is the fact i havent met her and she doesnt want this yet shes still here. thats a pretty big exception. why didnt she just go find another guy already?

She thinks she has found another good-looking guy. Because that's the photo you put up.  I don't know what made you think this could possibly ever work out but you were in for a rude awakening and I guess you won't believe it until it actually happens to you. She will probably try not to hurt your feelings at first but she will bail once you are honest with her.

[thomas131313]

1 minute ago, preraph said:

She thinks she has found another good-looking guy. Because that's the photo you put up.  I don't know what made you think this could possibly ever work out but you were in for a rude awakening and I guess you won't believe it until it actually happens to you. She will probably try not to hurt your feelings at first but she will bail once you are honest with her.

Your still avoiding what i asked

[thomas131313]

2 hours ago, BaileyB said:

That’s a really good question. Many women would have been long gone... happy to be single perhaps, or meeting/dating other men, long given up on this...

its cause we have truly connected and loves me, or this good looking guy. being this good looking guy obviously helps the situation and kept her around earlier on but thats not why she is staying around now. she could go find another good looking guy. i still think its more that she thinks she has found true love and her soulmate as she likes to say so she doesnt want to lose this. she said if she lost me she would never be the same. its either that or just mental issues i dont actually know. the truth is i knew this would never work but when she started saying all those things about how she would still want to be with me even if i was a different person and so on it made me think, even if she was just trying to find a way to meet me

[ExpatInItaly]

5 hours ago, thomas131313 said:

 why didnt she just go find another guy already?

Because I suspect she has a host of her own emotional issues and cannot find another guy to attach herself to that easily, OP. 

Many guys would run in the other direction if she came at them with talk of marriage and kids and tattoos and not being able to live without them, without ever having met the guy. The mere fact that she talks like this indicates she's not playing with a full deck, to put it bluntly.  I don't mean to be insensitive to her but I highly doubt she's had a lot of luck finding men who will stick around and not take advantage of her blatant naivety and emotional fragility. 

[BaileyB]

11 hours ago, thomas131313 said:

when she started saying all those things about how she would still want to be with me even if i was a different person and so on it made me think

Words are just that, words. There is no action here. No honesty. No truth. No commitment. Not even to meet.

You are placing way too much emphasis on her words... and they are meaningless... blown away on the wind as soon as they are said... left for you tor try and interpret their meaning. 

Its a fools errand. A total waste of both your time. 

[BaileyB]

8 hours ago, ExpatInItaly said:

Many guys would run in the other direction if she came at them with talk of marriage and kids and tattoos and not being able to live without them, without ever having met the guy.The mere fact that she talks like this indicates she's not playing with a full deck, to put it bluntly. 

And I hate to say it, but the simple fact that you stick around says pretty much the same about you. Mature, emotionally healthy people don’t do this. They find real relationships in the real world. 

[ShyViolet]

16 hours ago, thomas131313 said:

why didnt she just go find another guy already?

Because most guys would RUN from a crazy girl like this.  Most guys would not put up with it.

[K.K.]

This thread is really interesting! I can’t believe I skipped it before. Talk about weaving a web! Dude. The only thing you can do is tell her the truth, send a picture of the real you and hope she still likes you. It’s so funny how these online things all go the same way. You both think you’re sooooo in love with the other. It’s all smoke and mirrors. The heart is a funny thing. It’ll create what it wants if it can’t find it elsewhere. Sure, it’s insane. But there’s a lot of insane people in the world. 😉 

[thomas131313]

2 hours ago, BaileyB said:

And I hate to say it, but the simple fact that you stick around says pretty much the same about you. Mature, emotionally healthy people don’t do this. They find real relationships in the real world. 

You dont realize this girl is getting on cam with me every night and ordering lingerie and sex toys. many guys would not say no to this either

[ShyViolet]

21 minutes ago, thomas131313 said:

You dont realize this girl is getting on cam with me every night and ordering lingerie and sex toys. many guys would not say no to this either

LOL what does that even mean?  So just because she's gettin' sexy with you, that justifies all this?  News flash.... healthy relationships between people who are not crazy also include fun sexy times.