5 Years single and now this.

[Bliss25]

Hi All,

Hope those of you whos countries are under lockdown are coping ok!

The last time I posted on this forum was in 2017 to give an update on how I am coping post a huge breakup I went through in 2015.

I have been single for 5 years now and it turned out to be a really good 5 years of single life. I have become really happy with life and myself, and have experienced some amazing things. I have been on a lot of dates and have met a lot of women in the last 5 years but just have not been interested in any of them and preferred single life. As time has passed, I have become more and more picky and full of sh.. when it comes to dating. I guess one can say to a point where I have become scared of committing again. I have been living life on my own terms and wouldn't settle for anyone.

And then something happened. About a year ago a new girl started at work. I have been attracted to her since day one but thats pretty much where it stopped. for a while.. Fast forward to the last couple of months and I have absolutely been falling over my heels for this girl. I am at a place now where I constantly think of her. I haven't felt like this in many many years. the last time I felt like this was when I met my ex about 9 years ago. I feel like a teenage boy again liking a girl/crush!

Here is the thing the though. I think she might like me too. In the first couple of months of her starting working for us, one of my colleagues said to me "You do know this girl has a huge crush on you" .. I kind of brushed it off. Then after a few weeks another colleague said the same thing to me.

In the last couple of months we started flirting with each other on and off and when the lock-down started, we started texting a little more and flirted a bit more. One evening she even tried to get a bit kinky over text. She even saw me on tinder and liked me, I liked her back. We dont chat daily, but its on and off.

I am constantly thinking of her an I am afraid I have developed feelings for her. This is not lust. This is real. But now I am worried:

1. I am worried she does not feel this way about me. Which will suck and I will have to see her everyday (when lockdown ends eventually)
2. I am worried that she will meet another guy and get a boyfriend and how that will affect me at work and around her (I know this sounds insane but this all so strange to me)

 

Any advice ?

 

Thanks for listening!

[K.K.]

35 minutes ago, Bliss25 said:

 One evening she even tried to get a bit kinky over text. 

You see this ^^ 

36 minutes ago, Bliss25 said:

am worried she does not feel this way about me. Which will suck and I will have to see her everyday (when lockdown ends eventually)

She does! And look ...even if you two get together, in the end it’s probably going to turn into a big crap fest anyway. Work place romances often do. So have a plan in mind like one of you quitting if you want to be together for real. If not, there’s going to be constant friction regardless. Jealousies and weirdness. Many people have met at work and gotten married and gone on. Many have went down in flames. But in answer to your question, does she like you? Yes. She likes you. 

[ShyViolet]

She could meet another guy..... that's always a possibility and you have no control over that right now, as you two aren't in a relationship.  But you just have to accept the fact that you don't have control over everything.  Why don't you just try to get to know her better, suggest going on an actual date.  From your post it's hard to tell whether she actually has feelings for you, or is just interested in you sexually.  If it doesn't work out, things could be awkward at work, but that's a risk you have to decide whether you are willing to take.

[Marc878]

You’ll never know until you take the first step.

You're independent so that’ll help. 
 

Lets say it just doesn’t work out. You didn’t need her before so you’re good either way.

[miranda561]

7 hours ago, Bliss25 said:

Hi All,

Hope those of you whos countries are under lockdown are coping ok!

The last time I posted on this forum was in 2017 to give an update on how I am coping post a huge breakup I went through in 2015.

I have been single for 5 years now and it turned out to be a really good 5 years of single life. I have become really happy with life and myself, and have experienced some amazing things. I have been on a lot of dates and have met a lot of women in the last 5 years but just have not been interested in any of them and preferred single life. As time has passed, I have become more and more picky and full of sh.. when it comes to dating. I guess one can say to a point where I have become scared of committing again. I have been living life on my own terms and wouldn't settle for anyone.

And then something happened. About a year ago a new girl started at work. I have been attracted to her since day one but thats pretty much where it stopped. for a while.. Fast forward to the last couple of months and I have absolutely been falling over my heels for this girl. I am at a place now where I constantly think of her. I haven't felt like this in many many years. the last time I felt like this was when I met my ex about 9 years ago. I feel like a teenage boy again liking a girl/crush!

Here is the thing the though. I think she might like me too. In the first couple of months of her starting working for us, one of my colleagues said to me "You do know this girl has a huge crush on you" .. I kind of brushed it off. Then after a few weeks another colleague said the same thing to me.

In the last couple of months we started flirting with each other on and off and when the lock-down started, we started texting a little more and flirted a bit more. One evening she even tried to get a bit kinky over text. She even saw me on tinder and liked me, I liked her back. We dont chat daily, but its on and off.

I am constantly thinking of her an I am afraid I have developed feelings for her. This is not lust. This is real. But now I am worried:

1. I am worried she does not feel this way about me. Which will suck and I will have to see her everyday (when lockdown ends eventually)
2. I am worried that she will meet another guy and get a boyfriend and how that will affect me at work and around her (I know this sounds insane but this all so strange to me)

 

Any advice ?

 

Thanks for listening!

Don't stress. Just chill out and go with the flow.

I don't know any women who would be kinky/flirty without having some sort of interest in the guy.