rejected1 Posted May 9, 2020 Share Posted May 9, 2020 I've been with my boyfriend since November 2018 and exclusive since January 2019. In January of this year we moved in together. We get along so well, and I never thought I'd ever love someone as much as I did my ex. I knew from the beginning he was interested in marriage. I was engaged to my ex before he dumped me after almost seven years together. But now it has come up again. My boyfriend says he is ready to start talking about the future. I'm excited but at the same time I'm nervous. Things are going so good, and I have an internal fear of getting engaged, and well history repeating its self. My last contact, or more like my ex last attempted to contact me was back in February. He has tried since I got with my now boyfriend to get back with me, but I've moved on. I keep having these uncertain feelings. Should I be upfront and say that I am not ready for marriage and tell him why? Or should I just casually bring up my fears and see what he says? Any suggestions or comments appreciated. Link to post Share on other sites
K.K. Posted May 9, 2020 Share Posted May 9, 2020 Just now, rejected1 said: Should I be upfront and say that I am not ready for marriage and tell him why? Or should I just casually bring up my fears and see what he says? Any suggestions or comments appreciated. Yes. Nip it in the bud. Tell him to slow his roll and do it now before you find yourself at a football game or some such shyt with him down on one knee in front of thousands of people asking for your hand in marriage. Then you’ll be standing there hemming and hawing with your back against the wall. Any kind of ‘well mayyyybe in the future I’m scared right now’ is going to give him the green light to hold you to it. Just tell him Noooo. You don’t love him enough to even consider this. How do I know this? Because you’re still talking about your ex. Good luck. 🙂 1 Link to post Share on other sites
Author rejected1 Posted May 9, 2020 Author Share Posted May 9, 2020 I feel like I'm over my ex emotionally. I guess I'm not over what he did to me. Things with current boyfriend are going so good and I love him dearly. Link to post Share on other sites
schlumpy Posted May 9, 2020 Share Posted May 9, 2020 55 minutes ago, rejected1 said: I feel like I'm over my ex emotionally. I guess I'm not over what he did to me. Things with current boyfriend are going so good and I love him dearly. Then skip the engagement and get married. Link to post Share on other sites
ShyViolet Posted May 9, 2020 Share Posted May 9, 2020 Of course you should be honest with him about your feelings and tell him you're not ready to talk about marriage yet. How can you be in a relationship with someone if you can't even talk to them about how you are feeling. If he cares about you then he should respect that. Do not let him pressure you into moving towards marriage if you're not ready. 1 Link to post Share on other sites
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