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NOW he wants a relationship with me


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Teresa Cruz

So I was in a situationship with this for about 1.5 years and he told me he wasn’t ready for a relationship, I continued to be there for him, I was so nice to him, made him food, got him a small gift for his B-Day, we’d have sleepovers, we just really got along. He started getting really hot & cold maybe 3 months into the situationship, Im talking 12-15 hours to reply, sometimes days or a week, he’d also talk about his ex gf a lot, didn’t even wish me happy Valentine’s Day (even though i made him chocolate strawberries) I never gave them to him, no merry Christmas, he even told me he just saw me as a friend. 

He moved away 4 hours from me and I was already pretty much fed up with his inconsistency and not wanting a relationship so I said goodbye and let him go.. a week later he texted me asking how I’m doing, and how’s my new job, i didn’t reply, next week again How you been? I didn’t reply, 2 weeks later, hey I’m back in town and want to see you, i really miss you, miss knowing how you’re doing, i told him it’s best we didn’t see eachother because I’m not ready for that. The next week after that I actually went down to his town (he’s my cousins neighbor) I guess he saw my car parked outside and he BLEW UP my phone! Asking to see me, saying how he regrets everything, he’s ready for a relationship now, how he’s an idiot for not giving me a chance, just very apologetic.

I gave in after a whole day of him calling and texting and we met up in person and we talked, i told him how he really hurt me, how Im happier with my life this way because I’m not stressed anymore, i also mentioned how he said he only saw me as a friend & he said he said that because he didn’t want to get my hopes up anymore than they were, I also mentioned how I saw some heart comments from a girl (but he doesn’t know My cousins told me he had tried hooking up with her) so he said it was just a comment smh.. i didn’t say anything after that because I already know the truth behind the comment. 

He said he’s ready to be who i need him to be now but I’m just not sure. He kissed my forehead and we said bye. I did text him the next day and I said if he really meant everything and he said yes but seeing how much he hurt me makes him question the person he is and feels like he need to better himself. We continued talking but then he stopped replying at like 1pm and I texted him again at 5 saying Well it was nice talking to you , you’re always going to have a special place in my head.. no reply until 9am the next day he said sorry i was driving and then i worked out with friends but you’ll always have a special place in my heart too & he started talking to me about a normal day and i freaked out because i don’t wanna go back to how things were just like that.

I sent him a picture of us and then he said i remember that.. i didn’t reply then he sent a text 5 hours later saying I just got off work and i never replied.. 4 days went by and he didn’t try to text or call me again not even Goodmorning or goodnight or nothing. So I blocked him. But now I’m scared i messed up by blocking him because I feel like I didn’t even give him a chance to show me effort. I wonder if he’s even noticed he’s blocked or if he’s even tried to reach me. Do you think he deserves a second chance?

Edited by a LoveShack.org Moderator
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ExpatInItaly

In my experience, the guys who only notice your value once you've bowed out of their lives are the ones who bounce again quickly.

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Teresa Cruz
1 hour ago, ExpatInItaly said:

In my experience, the guys who only notice your value once you've bowed out of their lives are the ones who bounce again quickly.

Do you think I should just keep him blocked then & move on? I don’t know why i feel so bad for not giving him a second chance even though i know Im better this way. A part of me just wants to take him back. 😞 

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ExpatInItaly
17 hours ago, Teresa Cruz said:

Do you think I should just keep him blocked then & move on? I don’t know why i feel so bad for not giving him a second chance even though i know Im better this way. A part of me just wants to take him back. 😞 

Grant him another chance if you wish, but understand it's a significantly risky gamble. He only wanted you when he thought you were gone. What will likely happen is that as soon as he's got you back in his orbit, he will start to distance himself again. I would be very concerned that his sudden interest is fueled by his ego and not by a genuine to desire to be with you

If i were you and I decided not to try again, I would communicate my choice to him and then end contact. 

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Gr8fuln2020

Teresa Cruz. You do realize that you do not have the upper hand in all of this, don't you? 

You went down to see your cousin who lives next to this guy. Did you go down to see your cousin because it was a routine visit or because you were getting renewed attention by this guy? And when you met him, was it during the time of this visit or did you go down to him? Or him to you? If either of you had to drive, I hope it was him. If he wanted back in, one way to show it is for him to make the 3-hour drive, not you. 

You have reasons to doubt his sincerity and it is you who is all tied in knots. You do not have the advantage here. 

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miranda561
On 5/9/2020 at 7:07 PM, Teresa Cruz said:

Do you think I should just keep him blocked then & move on? I don’t know why i feel so bad for not giving him a second chance even though i know Im better this way. A part of me just wants to take him back. 😞 

Dont take him back. Move on. You don't  wanna go back and then he starts pulling the same ****. He will mess with your head again 

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  • 2 weeks later...
On 5/9/2020 at 12:29 PM, Teresa Cruz said:

But now I’m scared i messed up by blocking him because I feel like I didn’t even give him a chance to show me effort.

You didn't mess up anything. He has low interest when it comes to you.  He had more than enough chances to show you effort and at every crossroad, he took the turn away from you. How much more of your youth do you think you should squander on someone who can't return a phone call?

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he doesn’t know My cousins told me he had tried hooking up with her

  For chrissakes, he hit on your cousin!!! That should be more than enough for you to never be bothered with him again. 

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I texted him again at 5 saying Well it was nice talking to you , you’re always going to have a special place in my head..

No more passive aggressive texts/calls, no more trying to meet up with him, no more texting him.  He wants to be gone, so let him be gone.

Him putting on that performance for you was due to him not having a someone on deck when the chick he really wants to be with let him hang out to dry for a few days... he saw you and made the most of it--but ran out of steam because he's not checking for you like that.

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I wonder if he’s even noticed he’s blocked or if he’s even tried to reach me.

Probably not---he'd have said something to your cousin if that was the case.

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Do you think he deserves a second chance?

o_o  -_-  o_0

Edited by kendahke
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  • 2 weeks later...
loveiswar101

Yep..sorry...move on...notice when u were out frame message after message...once in frame he was very distance..paint your own and fresh picture now  

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