June2017 Posted May 17, 2020 Share Posted May 17, 2020 My friend has a history of falling out with women. Hes 24. So he has a lot of female friends and he gets a lot of female attention as he is very good looking. But his attitude at times takes over his looks as well as some of the positive qualities he has. He had a girlfriend when back in 2016 and it was all good. The girl was nice but they broke up and it was not a very pleasant ending for them. They were in the same societies at the university and ultimately, the girl left the society due to the issues between them. He was good friends with a PHd student and she was quite nice. He fell out with her as well because a lot of the times, he simply wouldnt listen to what she had to say , if it was something he wasnt liking. The girl was already annoyed at his attitude but they were still friends until one day something happened and yet again, he lost another friend. He was friends with another girl whom he shared his flat with and when his bicycle was destroyed, she would let him use her cycle if he needed to go to work, university etc. They had issues as well and he fell out with her again. I know he tried to fix his relationship with her but the girl wasn't having any of it and she snapped their friendship. He was also romantically interested in a girl at university whom he had been eyeing for months and he spoiled it as well by acting like a jerk towards her. His actions werent intentionally like a jerk but the way he was coming across, misunderstanding the situation and not listening to what she had to say, not communicating etc led to the demise of their budding romance. He is unable to befriend or date any women who are mature or genuinely sweet natured. The only women he gets along or is now dating , are the ones who are very immature and loud, who dont listen to other opinions, force their own views on everyone, are extremely cliquey and snobbish and whoever does not follow their ideologies is a disgusting person. What's going wrong with him? Does he not understand what's right or what's wrong? Link to post Share on other sites
ShyViolet Posted May 17, 2020 Share Posted May 17, 2020 He's only 24... that's very young. Maybe he's immature and selfish and still has a lot of growing up to do. A lot of people have to learn the hard way to change certain things about their behavior or personality, only when certain patterns of behavior don't work for them or bring about undesired results, they eventually figure out how to conduct themselves better and how to have better success in relationships. 1 Link to post Share on other sites
Author June2017 Posted May 17, 2020 Author Share Posted May 17, 2020 19 minutes ago, ShyViolet said: He's only 24... that's very young. Maybe he's immature and selfish and still has a lot of growing up to do. A lot of people have to learn the hard way to change certain things about their behavior or personality, only when certain patterns of behavior don't work for them or bring about undesired results, they eventually figure out how to conduct themselves better and how to have better success in relationships. Thanks. What do you think is his issues with these girls? Link to post Share on other sites
carhill Posted May 17, 2020 Share Posted May 17, 2020 Does he have any sisters? Have you ever met his mother? FOO is often crucial to relationship styles. Also, if he's gotten around in the local social scene and he's having problems he likely has a reputation now. Moving on to a different social scene, often natural after getting out of the educational scene, can help. If he hasn't moved to a completely different locale, that could be an issue as well. After getting burned by good looking bad boys when young, women sometimes become suspicious of good-looking guys and keep them at arm's length as far as anything serious goes. Sounds like this guy still has some bad boy remnants hanging around his psyche, though he's working on it. If women get a whiff that everything is about him, the narc label comes out and that's hard to shake. Link to post Share on other sites
Author June2017 Posted May 17, 2020 Author Share Posted May 17, 2020 14 minutes ago, carhill said: Does he have any sisters? Have you ever met his mother? FOO is often crucial to relationship styles. Also, if he's gotten around in the local social scene and he's having problems he likely has a reputation now. Moving on to a different social scene, often natural after getting out of the educational scene, can help. If he hasn't moved to a completely different locale, that could be an issue as well. After getting burned by good looking bad boys when young, women sometimes become suspicious of good-looking guys and keep them at arm's length as far as anything serious goes. Sounds like this guy still has some bad boy remnants hanging around his psyche, though he's working on it. If women get a whiff that everything is about him, the narc label comes out and that's hard to shake. He doesnt have any sisters I believe. I think he has cousins but I dont know if hes close to them. But hes very close to his mom though. She knows everything and she supports him in everything so technically hes a mama's boy. I'm guessing his mother has spoiled him a bit resulting in this kind of behaviour. Before I was friends with him, someone told me he was a player who was with a new girl each week but I have a hard time believing that since the girl who told me this was so gossipy about everyone. I have also seen first hand how he sabotaged his budding relationship with the girl he liked. I mean the way he was acting was not player type. Link to post Share on other sites
schlumpy Posted May 25, 2020 Share Posted May 25, 2020 On 5/17/2020 at 2:08 PM, June2017 said: Thanks. What do you think is his issues with these girls? He has too many options. That makes it easy to be selfish. There is always someone in waiting. Link to post Share on other sites
Recommended Posts