How can I date white women.

[Blind-Sided]

12 hours ago, observingman37 said:

Non of the above, well maybe a little bit of a. But that is my personal opinion.

There is no deep reason of why I want a white woman, it is simply my physical and sexual attraction. That's it.

Thanks... that made my laugh a little.

I travel for work, and I know Chicago's demographics, and it's a tough town outside of downtown.   I also understand that particular physical traits in someone will really spark interest in someone.  I myself REALLY like a "Ginger".  Very pale skin, very red hair, green eyes, and maybe a few freckles.  BUT... in all my years... I've only dated one girl like that.  After my divorce, there was a second girl who I was introduced to who was also like that, but we just didn't line up with our schedules.  My current GF is more Mediterranean.

My best friend from college falls under the same demographic as you... and his wife is white. They have been together for close to 24 years now.  We have talked about this a bunch of times over the years because in some places, that have been looked down on.  But unlike you... he didn't target a particular kind of girl... it just happened. I'm not sure if the OLD sites have those kinds of filters because someone may say it's racial.   So... knowing how attraction just happens for no particular reason... I would say to head closer to down town Chicago, and hang out in some of the clubs and restaurants there.  I personally would stay away from the tourist-y places, since those people probably aren't looking for anyone.   My only other suggestion is to move away from Chicago, and just move somewhere that is predominately white.  That way, the kind of girl you are looking for is the norm.   As an FYI... I know that generally works as my friend's brother moved to Japan, and is now married to a Japanese girl.

With all that said... don't push away girls who you start to have feelings for just because they aren't your target "Perfect" girl. (physically)   Like I said... I like a ginger, but I'm very happy with the girl I have.  But one of the girls you push away just may be the perfect girl for you.

good luck in your search.

[Blind-Sided]

12 hours ago, observingman37 said:

What I'm looking for in a woman is: Obviously white. Her height is 5'0 to 5'4, She doesn't drink. She doesn't have tattoos, if possible. I can probably go with a non virgin, but it is strongly recommended that she is a virgin like I am. And she just have a positive look on life in general.

Welllllll..... I really wish you luck on this one.  I think your first hurtle is hard enough for most people... but short, non-drinker virgin who is around 30 or so is going to be dang near impossible. The only reason I say that is... the few girls who would fall into your "Ideal" list will be very reserved, and I'm guessing they will have an issue with the interracial thing. Not to mention, they will probably be religious if they are in your ideal list. And because of that... they probably won't want to move out of their religion.  So... if white is your primary goal... then I think you will have to loosen up on the rest of your list.

@Fletch Lives Blazing saddles is one of my all time favorite movies. 

Edited May 21, 2020 by Blind-Sided

[observingman37]

6 hours ago, elaine567 said:

Why are you 37 and now looking for such a "rare" woman? 
What is your dating history like?

I have not dated before.

[CautiouslyOptimistic]

9 minutes ago, observingman37 said:

I have not dated before.

On purpose?

[observingman37]

3 hours ago, Blind-Sided said:

Thanks... that made my laugh a little.

I travel for work, and I know Chicago's demographics, and it's a tough town outside of downtown.   I also understand that particular physical traits in someone will really spark interest in someone.  I myself REALLY like a "Ginger".  Very pale skin, very red hair, green eyes, and maybe a few freckles.  BUT... in all my years... I've only dated one girl like that.  After my divorce, there was a second girl who I was introduced to who was also like that, but we just didn't line up with our schedules.  My current GF is more Mediterranean.

My best friend from college falls under the same demographic as you... and his wife is white. They have been together for close to 24 years now.  We have talked about this a bunch of times over the years because in some places, that have been looked down on.  But unlike you... he didn't target a particular kind of girl... it just happened. I'm not sure if the OLD sites have those kinds of filters because someone may say it's racial.   So... knowing how attraction just happens for no particular reason... I would say to head closer to down town Chicago, and hang out in some of the clubs and restaurants there.  I personally would stay away from the tourist-y places, since those people probably aren't looking for anyone.   My only other suggestion is to move away from Chicago, and just move somewhere that is predominately white.  That way, the kind of girl you are looking for is the norm.   As an FYI... I know that generally works as my friend's brother moved to Japan, and is now married to a Japanese girl.

With all that said... don't push away girls who you start to have feelings for just because they aren't your target "Perfect" girl. (physically)   Like I said... I like a ginger, but I'm very happy with the girl I have.  But one of the girls you push away just may be the perfect girl for you.

good luck in your search.

Just for the record I don't live in chicago, I live in detroit.

I'm doing the best I can to search for my ideal woman. I don't want to get a woman at random and I don't want to settle for less and have regrets down the line.

I may have to search places near outside of detroit.

[observingman37]

3 hours ago, Blind-Sided said:

Welllllll..... I really wish you luck on this one.  I think your first hurtle is hard enough for most people... but short, non-drinker virgin who is around 30 or so is going to be dang near impossible. The only reason I say that is... the few girls who would fall into your "Ideal" list will be very reserved, and I'm guessing they will have an issue with the interracial thing. Not to mention, they will probably be religious if they are in your ideal list. And because of that... they probably won't want to move out of their religion.  So... if white is your primary goal... then I think you will have to loosen up on the rest of your list.

@Fletch Lives Blazing saddles is one of my all time favorite movies. 

The only thing that is really a must is non drinker.

The rest of the criterias I may have to loosen up a bit.

The age range I would like is: 18 to 35

[observingman37]

6 minutes ago, CautiouslyOptimistic said:

On purpose?

Yes.

[Lotsgoingon]

If you've not dated before, then that's fine. 

BTW: dating is a fantastic goal. You must be in some period of growth and that's wonderful.  So, any chance you have any women friends? ... could be from work? ... could be from growing up? ... could by sisters or cousins.

Also how are you with friends? I'm going to assume that since you haven't dated before, you don't have a lot of friends. Making friends and strengthening acquaintance relationships is a great step toward dating. You use some of the very same skills in making friends and you do in dating: paying attention to who you like, finding people with shared interests, finding people you trust, opening up to the person, letting them open up to you. 

Have you been a loner most of your life? If so, that's fine. But a great step might be to head to a therapist's office. Are you in position to go to a therapist? Do you have insurance that covers some therapy visits? If so, I think that's a great move. In your case, I would say go to a woman therapist ... and you and the therapist together would set up goals and steps towards meeting people ... each of those steps gets you closer to dating. But that might not be a possibility ... in which case ... start with some books on dating. 

 

 

[observingman37]

29 minutes ago, Lotsgoingon said:

If you've not dated before, then that's fine. 

BTW: dating is a fantastic goal. You must be in some period of growth and that's wonderful.  So, any chance you have any women friends? ... could be from work? ... could be from growing up? ... could by sisters or cousins.

Also how are you with friends? I'm going to assume that since you haven't dated before, you don't have a lot of friends. Making friends and strengthening acquaintance relationships is a great step toward dating. You use some of the very same skills in making friends and you do in dating: paying attention to who you like, finding people with shared interests, finding people you trust, opening up to the person, letting them open up to you. 

Have you been a loner most of your life? If so, that's fine. But a great step might be to head to a therapist's office. Are you in position to go to a therapist? Do you have insurance that covers some therapy visits? If so, I think that's a great move. In your case, I would say go to a woman therapist ... and you and the therapist together would set up goals and steps towards meeting people ... each of those steps gets you closer to dating. But that might not be a possibility ... in which case ... start with some books on dating. 

 

 

Thanks for the reply.

I've always kept to myself most of my life, but at the same time I don't mind talking to people, progressing and learning new things. 

maybe some therapy would be a good help with some of the challenges that i have. the baha'i faith itself has been a good help and influence also.

i've came to a point in my life that i am honest about who i am and what i like, and being attracted to white women i me not holding back and being honest.

So I am finally trying to find my ideal woman.

 

Edited May 21, 2020 by observingman37

[Gr8fuln2020]

24 minutes ago, observingman37 said:

Thanks for the reply.

I've always kept to myself most of my life, but at the same time I don't mind talking to people, progressing and learning new things. 

maybe some therapy would be a good help with some of the challenges that i have. the baha'i faith itself has been a good help and influence also.

i've came to a point in my life that i am honest about who i am and what i like, and being attracted to white women i me not holding back and being honest.

So I am finally trying to find my ideal woman.

 

Caucasian women are a preference, so is there any room for mixed? Asian? Any other that you have entertained? Would open up your options some. 

[observingman37]

16 minutes ago, Gr8fuln2020 said:

Caucasian women are a preference, so is there any room for mixed? Asian? Any other that you have entertained? Would open up your options some. 

that's a good question.

perhaps an asian woman or an asian and caucasian mixed woman would come at a close second.

[Gr8fuln2020]

2 minutes ago, observingman37 said:

that's a good question.

perhaps an asian woman or an asian and caucasian mixed woman would come at a close second.

Women of ALL races are super hot! I was married to an amazing African American woman and lily-white, welsh, caucasian woman. Dated all races! Is your preference based on a very limited interaction and exposure? Why white women, specifically?

Edited May 21, 2020 by Gr8fuln2020

[rjc149]

15 minutes ago, Gr8fuln2020 said:

Women of ALL races are super hot! I was married to an amazing African American woman and lily-white, welsh, caucasian woman. Dated all races! Is your preference based on a very limited interaction and exposure? Why white women, specifically?

I would guess due to European beauty standards in our society. It's not just OP. American women of color also frequently prefer white men as mates. Dating site data supports this. Being white is often an SMV booster in and of itself. 

OP, I don't think the issue is whether there's a white woman within your specified parameters out there -- there certainly are -- I think the question is whether a white women in your specified parameters would select you over the rest of her extremely abundant dating options. You're not the only guy who's looking for a nice, young, attractive, single white woman who doesn't drink, party, have tattoos, and is a virgin or at least has a low notch count. That's a unicorn.

But, you'll be one of her few suitors who is a 37-year old virgin with no dating experience and is a strict adherent to an obscure and conservative religion. I'm not trying to be mean, these are not generally regarded as attractive attributes to American women, regardless of race. 

I think you'd be better off looking within your religious circle and meeting a woman who is on your page in terms of everything -- your worldview, life experience, place in life, etc. and be willing to compromise a bit on her race and most likely her physical attractiveness. 

The alternative would be to abandon the dicta of your religion, get real-world dating experience, learn game, become attractive to women, and give yourself some options. But if you're not interested in that, then you're not interested in that. 

 

[observingman37]

15 minutes ago, rjc149 said:

I would guess due to European beauty standards in our society. It's not just OP. American women of color also frequently prefer white men as mates. Dating site data supports this. Being white is often an SMV booster in and of itself. 

OP, I don't think the issue is whether there's a white woman within your specified parameters out there -- there certainly are -- I think the question is whether a white women in your specified parameters would select you over the rest of her extremely abundant dating options. You're not the only guy who's looking for a nice, young, attractive, single white woman who doesn't drink, party, have tattoos, and is a virgin or at least has a low notch count. That's a unicorn.

But, you'll be one of her few suitors who is a 37-year old virgin with no dating experience and is a strict adherent to an obscure and conservative religion. I'm not trying to be mean, these are not generally regarded as attractive attributes to American women, regardless of race. 

I think you'd be better off looking within your religious circle and meeting a woman who is on your page in terms of everything -- your worldview, life experience, place in life, etc. and be willing to compromise a bit on her race and most likely her physical attractiveness. 

The alternative would be to abandon the dicta of your religion, get real-world dating experience, learn game, become attractive to women, and give yourself some options. But if you're not interested in that, then you're not interested in that. 

 

Well like I said I am a hopeful person so I am still looking.

I try not to make things so complicated, and like I mentioned the only two things that is a must is that she's white and doesn't drink. the rest is maybe.

i wouldn't even try to get a woman that thinks what i am is a bad thing. that says something about the moral that she have.

i believe that there is a good number of moral women in the world. so i'm just doing my best to find them.

[Ami1uwant]

48 minutes ago, observingman37 said:

that's a good question.

perhaps an asian woman or an asian and caucasian mixed woman would come at a close second.

 

Are you look for the once you go black...

 

why havent you dated a woman at 37?

 

that will be a red flag to women.  

Id assume  any woman 27 and older is not a Virgin.

 

[observingman37]

1 hour ago, Gr8fuln2020 said:

Women of ALL races are super hot! I was married to an amazing African American woman and lily-white, welsh, caucasian woman. Dated all races! Is your preference based on a very limited interaction and exposure? Why white women, specifically?

To be honest, I actually would like to date multiple women. I would like to date black women, middle eastern women, asian women. You know why I would date multiple women? Because I sincerely believe that all women are the most physically beautiful creatures that God created on earth. The truth is I really wish that we could marry more than just one, if we could I would marry multiple women if any color or race. But we can't can we. We can only marry one. And like I mentioned, I'm one of those people that believe in not having sex before marriage. So I'm not going to go and have sex with multiple women.

I am 37yo here and my honest and favorite is white women. I am really just trying to narrow this down.

I'm not trying to make this a complicated thing, it is just I am simply attracted to white women.

Edited May 21, 2020 by observingman37

[Cookiesandough]

2 minutes ago, observingman37 said:

To be honest, I actually would like to date multiple women. I would like to date black women, middle eastern women, asian women. You know why I would date multiple women? Because I sincerely believe that all women are the most physically beautiful creatures that God created on earth. The truth is I really wish that we could marry more than just one, if we could I would marry multiple women if any color or race. But we can't can we. We can only marry one. And like I mentioned, I'm one of those people that believe in not having sex before marriage. So I'm not going to go and have sex with multiple women.

I am 37yo here and my honest and favorite is white women. I am really just trying to narrow this down.

I'm not trying to make this a complicated thing, it is just I am simply attracted to white women.

move to Utah

[Gr8fuln2020]

6 minutes ago, observingman37 said:

Well like I said I am a hopeful person so I am still looking.

I try not to make things so complicated, and like I mentioned the only two things that is a must is that she's white and doesn't drink. the rest is maybe.

i wouldn't even try to get a woman that thinks what i am is a bad thing. that says something about the moral that she have.

i believe that there is a good number of moral women in the world. so i'm just doing my best to find them.

OP, sorry, but you do make things MORE complicated when you ONLY consider women of one race and doesn't drink. I know it is your preference, but your restrictions, do make things MORE complicated to find someone. In another vein, you speak of morality, but virginity is not a MUST. So, your moral code is subjective, just like anyone else's. People will and do have misgivings about your faith, not because, their "morals" are worse than your own. Just as subjective. 

Anyhoo, there are plenty of nice, wonderful women out there doing their best for sure. Still, I am curious why in this post you have returned to making whiteness a must. What is it about a white woman? Just curious. I grew up in the same Western world where white is pushed as better, more attractive, which its not, of course, but I have and do date women of all races with enthusiasm.  

[Gr8fuln2020]

2 minutes ago, Cookiesandough said:

move to Utah

He would have NO (or even less) chance. Again, his religious convictions would make it even more difficult in Utah. 

Edited May 21, 2020 by Gr8fuln2020

[Gr8fuln2020]

6 minutes ago, observingman37 said:

To be honest, I actually would like to date multiple women. I would like to date black women, middle eastern women, asian women. You know why I would date multiple women? Because I sincerely believe that all women are the most physically beautiful creatures that God created on earth. The truth is I really wish that we could marry more than just one, if we could I would marry multiple women if any color or race. But we can't can we. We can only marry one. And like I mentioned, I'm one of those people that believe in not having sex before marriage. So I'm not going to go and have sex with multiple women.

I am 37yo here and my honest and favorite is white women. I am really just trying to narrow this down.

I'm not trying to make this a complicated thing, it is just I am simply attracted to white women.

Whoah. Now I understand. I missed this post when I recently posted. You need to move to another country...again, your religious faith is a bludgeoning complication. 

[Cookiesandough]

I thought they were trying to decriminalize polygamy out there? But just do you, OP. Like what you like. Nothing wrong with it. We all have preferences. But I was suggest you’ve waited long enough now. Stop thinking about it, “observing”, and just go for it. When we think too theoretically with become idealistic. Just date. You  might meet a black woman who completely rocks your world 

Edited May 21, 2020 by Cookiesandough

[Gr8fuln2020]

17 minutes ago, Cookiesandough said:

I thought they were trying to decriminalize polygamy out there? But just do you, OP. Like what you like. Nothing wrong with it. We all have preferences. But I was suggest you’ve waited long enough now. Stop thinking about it, “observing”, and just go for it. When we think too theoretically with become idealistic. Just date. You  might meet a black woman who completely rocks your world 

Utah has done that. It (Bigamy/Polygamy) is now a minor infraction. The state did so to encourage more women to open-up about the abuse that occurs in the polygamist communities AND allow more access to public services. It is controversial for sure. But, for the OP, bigamy is not the problem. It is his faith. 

IMPORTANT EDIT: My mistake. The Utah state Senate has passed the bill, but not the House, so not law yet. As I said, if you know anything about the state's history, you would know why this is even more controversial. 

Edited May 21, 2020 by Gr8fuln2020

[Cookiesandough]

Oh okay I see. Thanks.

 

& yes could very well be a white woman. Opposites attract and all. White woman/black man is  actually the most common interracial coupling aside from Asian woman/white man 

[rjc149]

26 minutes ago, observingman37 said:

Well like I said I am a hopeful person so I am still looking.

I try not to make things so complicated, and like I mentioned the only two things that is a must is that she's white and doesn't drink. the rest is maybe.

i wouldn't even try to get a woman that thinks what i am is a bad thing. that says something about the moral that she have.

i believe that there is a good number of moral women in the world. so i'm just doing my best to find them.

It's good to be have standards and be hopeful, while also being realistic about what's achievable. It's not good to pass up opportunities to hit singles and doubles, score runs, and enjoy the game, because you'll only be satisfied if you hit a full count 9th-inning grand slam into the upper deck on game 7 of the world series. You only get so much time in life.

Again, I think it would also be helpful for you to put more focus on what you can offer, not what a non-drinking white woman can offer you. The more appeal you have, the more likely you'll get what you want. 

[SumGuy]

Sounds like you have strong religious beliefs which lead to most of your criteria, your best bet in my opinion is a woman who shares the same beliefs.   So church related functions are likely you very best bet, just choose a church that has more white women at it.