I'm broken

[Honeyhey]

I have been married for almost 7 years. But Married life is not as beautiful as I imagined. In our first year I got to see who he really was. He is a jealous and possesive man. He always hanged out with his friends and leave me alone in our house. He is a good provider and a responsible father to our daughter. But what bothers me is he being an alcoholic and when he makes me feel that he is. Like a bachelor and not a married man. Year onwars his behavior worsen. He always get mad when I am happy. Every time I tell him that I'll have dinner with my friends after work he will get mad. He was taking my social life away from me. He is jealous to all my girl and guy friends. He wants me to follow his orders and it made me feel like a prisoner. I cried a river. I Feel like I'm not valued as a wife. I fell out of love. And then one day he tried to touch my 15 yrs old sister. I reported him but everything went fine that time. But now it seems like he has. Plans to do it again. I feel so helpless I want to leave him but I got nowhere to go and can't afford to pay for a rent. I feel so hopeless what should I do. 

[rjc149]

Can you stay with relatives? 

I'm assuming you're Filipino Catholic and divorce may be a tough thing to do in that society -- but you should divorce him, as soon as possible. 

[Fox Sake]

I’m sorry you’re being treated so badly  

you need to rely on some good friends or family to stay with and help you away from this situation. You need to keep yourself safe and out of harms way.

I find it suspicious of his jealousy and behaviour.  A lot of the time people get jealous because they reflect their own insecurities back on their partner. Unless of course they have had a particularly troubled past with being cheated on. But 9/10 they’re the ones doing the cheating or window shopping for other women, and that’s what drives the paranoia about their partners cheating and keeping control of them. 
 

you’ve already said you fell out of love. So don’t waste anymore of your time pandering to his needs. Life is short , and it’s important to be happy and live it to the fullest you can. 
 

if you feel threatened or unsafe , please speak to your friends or family, or call a women’s aid group immediately. 
 

Did you sign a prenup? 
Having never been married I don’t know how things work , but I’m pretty sure if you divorce without having a prenup in place,  you’ll be financially take care of. Half is what’s his is yours and he also would have child maintenance etc etc. Maybe someone more knowledgeable than me can give you the advice you need. 
 

stay strong , and know that this too shall pass. It may take some time to sort out but once you have a plan you need to stick to it and see it through. Life is too short to be unhappy like that. You deserve better.  

Edited May 29, 2020 by Fox Sake
Dyslexic