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Little brother and Ex


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So this is embarrassing but my and my girlfriend of about 5 months recently broke up Im pretty sure my younger brother is either sleeping with her or is going to.... I’m 31 and he’s 27 ... she’s 32.... she broke up for me saying we had bad chemistry which is a nice way of saying I suck in bed after the breakup we stayed friends and she met my brother, Alex, and they really hit it off and became friends now they text and flirt all the time and he asked me if I cared if he tried with her and I said no I didn’t since I figured she’d find him too young but now they’ve gone out three times I don’t know if as friends or romantic... he stayed at her place after each date... I’ve always been a little jealous of him I know he has a bigger d**k and is more mature and I know she’s all about the bigger guys... do you think they are sleeping together? Should I be worried they are going to date? 

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simpycurious

The ship has left the dock and smoothly sailing out in the Gulf.  In other words, yes they are

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3 minutes ago, simpycurious said:

The ship has left the dock and smoothly sailing out in the Gulf.  In other words, yes they are

Maybe just friends? 

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Spainglish

If you're just friends now, what does it matter?   If she thought you sucked in bed, what does it matter? 
You told him you were okay with him giving it a go with her, so what does it matter? 

Don't let the thought of them take up too much real estate in your head.  You deserve to be with someone you have amazing chemistry with and who's so into you they wouldn't look twice at your brother.  Go find her.  Forget about your "friend" and your brother and what they "might" be doing. 

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2 minutes ago, Spainglish said:

If you're just friends now, what does it matter?   If she thought you sucked in bed, what does it matter? 
You told him you were okay with him giving it a go with her, so what does it matter? 

Don't let the thought of them take up too much real estate in your head.  You deserve to be with someone you have amazing chemistry with and who's so into you they wouldn't look twice at your brother.  Go find her.  Forget about your "friend" and your brother and what they "might" be doing. 

But do you think they are? 

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Spainglish

What are you preparing for exactly?  Does your brother live with you? DO you have to see her all the time?  
Then I could see having to mentally prepare for something. 

To answer your question.  If he asked if he could go out with her and she has spent the night with him more than once.  
The answer is yes.  He didn't ask you permission so they could play Monopoly without you. 😁

I suggest if you really want to know, ask your brother.  Say, hey how's it going with so and so?  
If you ask casually, chances are he will be straight with you.  
 

Edited by Spainglish
wording
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6 minutes ago, Spainglish said:

What are you preparing for exactly?  Does your brother live with you? DO you have to see her all the time?  
Then I could see having to mentally prepare for something. 

To answer your question.  If he asked if he could go out with her and she has spent the night with him more than once.  
The answer is yes.  He didn't ask you permission so they could play Monopoly without you. 😁

I suggest if you really want to know, ask your brother.  Say, hey how's it going with so and so?  
If you ask casually, chances are he will be straight with you.  
 

Well hey maybe they are just friends! 

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Spainglish

I'm really sorry about the situation. I"m sure it's not easy.
This limbo you are in, always wondering, is going to hold you back from meeting the person you're supposed to meet.  Focus your energy on you and forget about them. 

If you really MUST know, you really need to ask your brother in a way that will allow him to understand it's okay to be honest with you about it. 

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Just now, Spainglish said:

I'm really sorry about the situation. I"m sure it's not easy.
This limbo you are in, always wondering, is going to hold you back from meeting the person you're supposed to meet.  Focus your energy on you and forget about them. 

If you really MUST know, you really need to ask your brother in a way that will allow him to understand it's okay to be honest with you about it. 

I asked him he said they are sleeping together ugh! Lol

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Spainglish

I know that sucks.  But, look at it this way, he gets the leftovers and you get to find someone better.  🙂

If she was able to jump from you to your brother that easily, she's probably not going to stick around very long for him either. 
You walk away the winner here.

 

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Well he asked you if you were ok with it, and you said you didn't care.  But clearly you do.  Next time be honest.

Now it's too late, it's happening.  What does it really matter?  She wasn't the one for you, now you're free to move on.  Try to let it go.

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Your story is remarkably close to this one.   Sharing it as the advice may be relevant

 

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12 hours ago, ShyViolet said:

Well he asked you if you were ok with it, and you said you didn't care.  But clearly you do.  Next time be honest.

Now it's too late, it's happening.  What does it really matter?  She wasn't the one for you, now you're free to move on.  Try to let it go.

Thanks just kinda sucks that he’s able to satisfy and I was not

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introverted1
3 hours ago, MarkRey said:

Thanks just kinda sucks that he’s able to satisfy and I was not

Is she the only gf you haven't been able to satisfy?  If not, you can learn to be a better lover. You might want to post in the Sexuality forum for advice. 

Assuming you've had good sex with previous gf's, though, it's more likely that you and your ex just weren't a good fit. 

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23 hours ago, introverted1 said:

Is she the only gf you haven't been able to satisfy?  If not, you can learn to be a better lover. You might want to post in the Sexuality forum for advice. 

Assuming you've had good sex with previous gf's, though, it's more likely that you and your ex just weren't a good fit. 

It’s been a recurring struggle it seems I’m only attracted to women used to bigger guys 😂

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On 6/2/2020 at 2:11 AM, basil67 said:

Your story is remarkably close to this one.   Sharing it as the advice may be relevant

 

Yeah, that's immediately what I thought.  Whether this is him or not, you've got to 1) stop lying and saying things are okay with you when they're not and 2) stop wasting time obsessing over some woman who dumps you for your own brother, because that is super trashy!  And 3)  Women who dump you over size, let them go.  They're in the minority.  Stop wasting your life over this.  If you are that other person, you've been at it for months, obsessing in an unhealthy way about it.  

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