I'm seeing this new guy and I feel like his ex might be the person he wants to be with and he's in denial.

[Hali Carter]

@d0nnivain lol you may have been right she sent him a cold “gave the watch to someone else. Just letting you know so you don’t have anything to ask me about” and then blocked his phone number as well. He told me. I was like weren’t you blocked before and he said “on all social media but not her phone”. So she is kind of cold maybe?

[d0nnivain]

She disposed of the watch AND told him about it because he wanted a reaction. She wanted his attention. 

His body may be with you on weekends but his heart & soul are with her.  

[Hali Carter]

8 minutes ago, d0nnivain said:

She disposed of the watch AND told him about it because he wanted a reaction. She wanted his attention. 

His body may be with you on weekends but his heart & soul are with her.  

That’s really mean tho.... why tell someone basically “I gave something away I was supposed to give to you just so you have no reason to talk to me” and then block him. 

Edited June 13, 2020 by Hali Carter

[d0nnivain]

It is mean but it's working.  She has his attention.  When some people can't get positive attention, they take whatever they can get including negative attention.  

 

But you have to stop paying attention to whatever sick game they are playing & figure out why you are willing to be involved at all?  

Edited June 13, 2020 by d0nnivain

[Hali Carter]

4 hours ago, d0nnivain said:

It is mean but it's working.  She has his attention.  When some people can't get positive attention, they take whatever they can get including negative attention.  

 

But you have to stop paying attention to whatever sick game they are playing & figure out why you are willing to be involved at all?  

He actually followed my best friends husband back on insta.... should I feel better now? I kind of do  or no?

[Crazelnut]

Why do you keep defending him? Don't say you're not. You are, in almost every post. And you keep asking questions that indicate you're trying to justify her as the bad guy and him as a loving BF. Sorry, but here's the harsh truth that you don't want to hear:

He is still emotionally tied to her. His words say he's done, but his actions say he still cares enough to give her head space. Negative attention is still attention. He gets off on having 2 women want him. Don't ask again which actions. Everything you've said about him. It doesn't matter if he's hanging out with you on weekends. He's just killing time with you. 

 

You asked. We answered. You clearly don't want to hear our answers, though. 

[HadMeOverABarrel]

On 6/11/2020 at 1:54 PM, Hali Carter said:

Based on talking to him, the main reason it seems he stops himself from talking to her is because his mother HATES her like HATES her. He told me he would sneak and hang out with her and his mother would tell him “you’re being disobedient to God” so I asked what did she do for your mom to hate her. And he said she was spiteful when I would cheat on her and would lash out.

Wow, talk about some mommy issues! Now we can see where he learned to triangulate.

I proffer that mommy only hates her because no woman is good enough for her baby boy (or really mommy does not want to share him).  Clearly his mother is way over-involved in his love life since he has to sneak behind her back to have a girlfriend. Look out! You might be mommy's next target if she begins to see her son develop a serious emotional attachment to you.

Meanwhile, he is definitely egging on his ex. Also, who doesn't "lash out" after being betrayed, deceived, and boundaries violated?

This guy is no prize, OP. I hope you don't end up learning this the hard way.

(NOTE: I've only read up to this point on your thread before posting this comment).

[HadMeOverABarrel]

17 hours ago, Hali Carter said:

He does hang out with me every weekend tho. We have party’s at my place With drinks and games  and he always comes. Like he does make an effort to be around me

Hali, is this where you've set the bar for the guy who gets to be number one in your life? Is the fact that he's not repulsed by you good enough? You owe it to yourself to set a higher standard for yourself.

[Hali Carter]

@d0nnivain @elaine567 @smackie9 the past few days all he’s been posting on Instagram are quote pics and things posting about how life is too short and happiness is key, quotes to love yourself. And a few days ago he lost a pic of himself from 3 years ago as if it were new.....