abcdefghijk Posted June 14, 2020 Share Posted June 14, 2020 I’m not sure this should be in coping, but it is about loss… I had a dream last night that my sister and I ‘parted ways’ over the way she has been treating me lately, and it has made it clear to me that she has never really treated me well, and probably never really liked me, and to be honest, would love to be rid of me as a brother if she had her way - the family ‘joke’ is that she did exactly that when I was born - walked down the street trying to ‘give me away’ Anyway, I had a dream that we we’re ‘locked’ together and I turned upside and ‘un-locked’ this key in her, and we seperated and drifted apart… I know it doesn’t sound that ‘prophetic’, but it means a lot to me, as it seems to have summed up her breaking my heart recently So, my question is… I feel like I need some sort of ‘ritual’ or something to symbolise this in real life for some reason (kinda like a funeral, or burning a wedding dress, etc.) to ‘let her go’ - does anyone have any simple suggestions? Thanks! Link to post Share on other sites
d0nnivain Posted June 14, 2020 Share Posted June 14, 2020 Best I can offer is you write her a long letter expressing all your upset. Then you find a safe place & light it on fire. Include a photo of the two of you. Watch the flame lick & consume the paper. Watch the smoke drift away. Let all your hurt go up & away with the smoke. Good luck. 2 Link to post Share on other sites
scooby-philly Posted June 14, 2020 Share Posted June 14, 2020 One other thought, though I like @d0nnivain's idea about the fire - is to put her name on a rock, say a prayer, and then chuck it into a river or lake or the ocean. And while the thread typically deals with relationships, it's open to anything so don't feel bad. And do not feel bad about the situation. While we do not know the breadth and depth of the relationship and the problems you experienced, a lot of people. And I mean A LOT, have to say goodbye to a family member or even multiple members for years or even forever in order to lead a happy, productive, healthy, and prosperous life. There's no shame in that. Especially in Western cultures where so many people are angry, entitled, mean, selfish, narrow minded, drama filled, abusive, etc. - there's no shame in walking away and just doing you as they say. 1 Link to post Share on other sites
Author abcdefghijk Posted June 14, 2020 Author Share Posted June 14, 2020 Thanks d0nnivain & scooby-philly, Yes, I didn't want to get into all the details, but it still absolutely breaks my heart that people you think are closest to you, and have your best interests in mind (well, at least more than any other person in the world might) are (as you say Scooby... angry, entitled, mean, selfish, narrow minded, drama filled, abusive, etc. - it really makes you question who anyone is in your life... Anyway, thanks for the feedback & nice tips! Link to post Share on other sites
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