MeadowFlower Posted June 17, 2020 Share Posted June 17, 2020 I know friendzone is kind of a cheesy expression to use but just bare with it. Anyway, what should someone do if they don't want to be in the friendzone with someone anymore? Link to post Share on other sites
FMW Posted June 17, 2020 Share Posted June 17, 2020 Being in the friendzone with someone usually means that person has had the opportunity to express more interest but has chosen to not pursue anything beyond friendship. The person being friendzoned can either agree to just being friends or move on. There really is no other choice. No one can be made to have romantic feelings for someone else, and if all the other person is offering is friendship, that's all there is. 2 Link to post Share on other sites
rjc149 Posted June 17, 2020 Share Posted June 17, 2020 Different answer, depending on if the friendzoned party is male or female. Link to post Share on other sites
Emilie Jolie Posted June 17, 2020 Share Posted June 17, 2020 51 minutes ago, MeadowFlower said: what should someone do if they don't want to be in the friendzone with someone anymore? What's the context? Link to post Share on other sites
Author MeadowFlower Posted June 17, 2020 Author Share Posted June 17, 2020 46 minutes ago, FMW said: The person being friendzoned can either agree to just being friends or move on. There really is no other choice. So in practical terms, how does on move on? Like you can't just ignore the other person when they message, can you? Link to post Share on other sites
Author MeadowFlower Posted June 17, 2020 Author Share Posted June 17, 2020 23 minutes ago, rjc149 said: Different answer, depending on if the friendzoned party is male or female. The friendzoned party is female. Link to post Share on other sites
Author MeadowFlower Posted June 17, 2020 Author Share Posted June 17, 2020 Just now, MeadowFlower said: So in practical terms, how does on move on? Like you can't just ignore the other person when they message, can you? Sorry that should've been, how does one* move on? Link to post Share on other sites
rjc149 Posted June 17, 2020 Share Posted June 17, 2020 18 minutes ago, MeadowFlower said: The friendzoned party is female. Info is pretty sparse so advice will be pretty generic. A friendzoned party can accept it, or refuse to be in it. It's tough for them to "leave" it although it's possible. It can be done by making oneself generally more appealing to the opposite sex and by ceasing to be available to the object of their affection. Usually via a slow fade, rather than an abrupt severance. Link to post Share on other sites
Author MeadowFlower Posted June 17, 2020 Author Share Posted June 17, 2020 8 minutes ago, rjc149 said: ...by ceasing to be available to the object of their affection. Usually via a slow fade, rather than an abrupt severance. Okay. Thanks for this. Link to post Share on other sites
ShyViolet Posted June 17, 2020 Share Posted June 17, 2020 Well you can't force someone to date you, or be interested in you romantically. So if you don't want to be in the friend zone anymore, then you stop being friends with the person. That's it. Link to post Share on other sites
basil67 Posted June 17, 2020 Share Posted June 17, 2020 1 hour ago, MeadowFlower said: So in practical terms, how does on move on? Like you can't just ignore the other person when they message, can you? If you want to do it nicely, you explain that because you would like more than friendship, you're unable to move on while they keep contacting you. Link to post Share on other sites
spiderowl Posted June 17, 2020 Share Posted June 17, 2020 Spend less time with them and treat them as a friend. Be more casual about meeting, say you can't meet often because you are doing something else. Mentally switch off and decide you will be open to meeting someone new. Treat your friend as a friend not a potential lover. If you do the above, you will start to find other opportunities because you won't be hanging around with him every spare minute he lets you. He will see you are losing interest and, who knows, he might look at you differently, but don't bank on it! Being scarce makes you more valuable. Don't make it easy for him to spend time with you and reduce the texting gradually so it's not too obvious (though he will notice). I hope you find someone who does appreciate you more and wants you to be his girlfriend. As long as you hang around with this guy and give him your time, you won't find anyone else. I know you might say you don't want anyone else, but he needs to get the picture that you are moving on. Good luck! 2 Link to post Share on other sites
mark clemson Posted June 17, 2020 Share Posted June 17, 2020 (edited) 2 hours ago, MeadowFlower said: The friendzoned party is female. ^^^^ - noting this. MHO: she moves on by getting on with her life and seeking other/new relationships and forgetting about this one as a relationship. It can continue as a friendship, but if it's interfering with forming new relationships, then ending the friendship (e.g. via slow fade as mentioned above) is probably necessary. I would note that, generally with men in the friendzone: - If the man made romantic overtures but is "relegated" to the friendzone that is a negative thing (and there is probably not much hope of a romantic relationship ever forming); however - - If the man is an actual friend (and willing to play the long game) the friendzone can be a good place to be because sometimes the woman will develop romantic attraction to the (genuine) friend. Just my two cents on this... Edited June 17, 2020 by mark clemson 1 Link to post Share on other sites
Author MeadowFlower Posted June 18, 2020 Author Share Posted June 18, 2020 Thanks everyone for your replies 🙂 Link to post Share on other sites
manfrombelow Posted June 18, 2020 Share Posted June 18, 2020 10 hours ago, MeadowFlower said: I know friendzone is kind of a cheesy expression to use but just bare with it. Anyway, what should someone do if they don't want to be in the friendzone with someone anymore? The answer is more simple than you think: NOTHING Which means, you stop trying to pursue (which means investing your time, emotion and energy) the person that friendzoned you. That's it. Want me to elaborate? Ask me. 2 Link to post Share on other sites
Author MeadowFlower Posted June 18, 2020 Author Share Posted June 18, 2020 36 minutes ago, manfrombelow said: The answer is more simple than you think: NOTHING Which means, you stop trying to pursue (which means investing your time, emotion and energy) the person that friendzoned you. That's it. Want me to elaborate? Ask me. Yep, that's a pretty good answer. Except when they initiate a message... If you want to elaborate on that you may, lol. 1 Link to post Share on other sites
basil67 Posted June 18, 2020 Share Posted June 18, 2020 Jumping in with my 2c. What you do depends on which outcome you want. Generally speaking, it's nigh near impossible to get out of the friendzone, so the two remaining options are a) accept their friendship or b) remove them from your life. Do you want A or B? 2 Link to post Share on other sites
Azincourt Posted June 18, 2020 Share Posted June 18, 2020 14 hours ago, MeadowFlower said: I know friendzone is kind of a cheesy expression to use but just bare with it. Anyway, what should someone do if they don't want to be in the friendzone with someone anymore? I don't get in the friendzone in the first place. A woman who is attracted to me, will hit on me the very first moment/week(first few weeks) she sees me for the very first time. If she doesn't, then I assume she's either not physically attracted to me, or she's shy, and I have no interest in shy women. If you are talking about developing feelings for someone over time, and the person you're interested in isn't interested back? Slowly cut off contact with that person until your feelings vanish. Link to post Share on other sites
SumGuy Posted June 23, 2020 Share Posted June 23, 2020 I'm not certain if you expressed you would like more than friendship and they said no or you are friends and would like to be more than friends. On the former, could bring it up you are still thinking about them and would like to try if they change their mind...have you considered seduction? On the later, bring it up, in a non-pressure way. They likely value the friendship so you can let them know you do to, and are finding you are starting to think of them as more than that, and ask them how they think of you. It's a kind of soft way to enter into the discussion. I've seen both work. It really comes down to if they feel the same way, and keeping the pressure off as this is asking for a change in the relationship...so don't ask for a "change" but more of adding a bit more, exploring a bit more. 1 Link to post Share on other sites
dispatch3d Posted July 12, 2020 Share Posted July 12, 2020 How are you so sure you're friendzoned? Did he directly friendzone you? In all other cases you aren't friendzoned. Link to post Share on other sites
Author MeadowFlower Posted July 16, 2020 Author Share Posted July 16, 2020 On 7/12/2020 at 8:08 PM, dispatch3d said: How are you so sure you're friendzoned? Did he directly friendzone you? In all other cases you aren't friendzoned. I just assume. He's never said he likes me in that way. And my face is beauty challenged A LOT. And other things. Link to post Share on other sites
CAPSLOCK BANDIT Posted July 17, 2020 Share Posted July 17, 2020 He is probably into your friends Link to post Share on other sites
Author MeadowFlower Posted July 19, 2020 Author Share Posted July 19, 2020 On 7/18/2020 at 5:39 AM, CAPSLOCK BANDIT said: He is probably into your friends I don't have friends 😂 (well hardly any, and he doesn't know them) Link to post Share on other sites
alphamale Posted July 19, 2020 Share Posted July 19, 2020 On 7/12/2020 at 4:44 AM, enigma32 said: As a guy, if I put a girl in the friendzone, there is a very good reason for it and she has almost no hope of ever changing my mind. I am the stubborn sort though, as some of my fellow posters here may attest. Basil gave the best advice here. i will attest Link to post Share on other sites
Author MeadowFlower Posted July 19, 2020 Author Share Posted July 19, 2020 On 6/18/2020 at 7:29 PM, basil67 said: Jumping in with my 2c. What you do depends on which outcome you want. Generally speaking, it's nigh near impossible to get out of the friendzone, so the two remaining options are a) accept their friendship or b) remove them from your life. Do you want A or B? I should probably do B. Link to post Share on other sites
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