Bullying in the office

[Davbaxt]

Just want to stress I am not being bullied nor am I bullying anyone.

A work colleague in our office is though. Last year around October time, two of the office bullies had removed another colleague by setting him up to get fired. After this "victory" they moved on to this colleague. We'll call him Simon for this to protect him if he ever see's this.

After their victory, the two bullies moved on to Simon, who was settled down, moved in with his girlfriend and loving what he had. We are a small office in our town in the UK, there is 16 of us. Simon doesn't like mainstream things, he likes his planes, trains and strange vehicles. He is harmless, doesn't go on about his likes, just has a small model on his desk of a plane.

We got along really well, He knew my son was in to electronics and used to give me kits for him that he had made the PCB and such like. 

The bullies didn't like him, one day Simon left his phone on his desk whilst he popped to the kitchen, they got in to his phone (We work in IT so its not hard to get past those lock screens) and found his girlfriends details. They started their campaign against him and started sending his girlfriend messages until their split up, he was thrown out. We talked and Simon said he knew what they had done, but his girlfriend wasn't listening because the bullies had done "quite a good job on her". I even tried explaining to SImons girlfriend but was told that the bullies had told her this would happen and I'm protecting Simon, I'm not I replied I'm telling you the truth.

Simon and I spoke again, he had moved back home to his parents place. He said he was still paying half the rent on his girlfriends place as he was on the agreement and even though shes believed the liars, he loves her and she couldn't afford the place on her own so until the end of the minimum term he was helping her out until she could get someone else to move in or she moved out. 

The campaign in the office really started. The bullies were poisoning people one by one against Simon, until Simon was on his own. He talked to me outside of work and he said "I'll just have to ride it out they'll get bored eventually".  They didn't, Secret Santa for christmas came along and he wasn't included. Simon just said its fine and for us to have fun. The day of our Christmas Party and Secret Santa, Simon had booked off as to miss the gift giving part and just come for the party. He turns up and people are just ignoring him, we have a few beers together. We have people up from our other office, for our christmas party. They were talking to him, one of the bullies spoke to one of the guys from the other office, (These bullies are extremely popular in our company). They were talking nicely this other person whispers something and I hear Simon say "I perfectly understand, I wouldn't talk to me neither." I see Simon stood there with a beer I was still working so couldn't shout him over, He just looked upset,  and a minute of so later I saw him put his beer down and walk out of the office. 

We was going for something to eat, we was walking past Burger King and I saw Simon there looking at job websites on his phone. 

Christmas comes along, I ask what he is doing he says his parents are away and he had originally planned before all this kicked off to spend it with his now ex. But its just going to be him and the TV, I invite him round to ours, He thanks for me and says its time for family and I still have career prospects at the company and not to be seen to be associated with him. I have a meeting with our boss after asking him about something unrelated. I raise this and she said "I don't think <Bullies> would do any of this, As they say theres no smoke without fire".

January and we have a team night out. Simon wasn't invited. I refused to go too. One morning Simon come in and found someone had broke his model plane. After this Simon has become distant with everyone. He come in just before work, left at lunch, come back for the afternoon session and go, I saw him once on lunch just sat in gardens near to our office applying for jobs. 

In March we were sent to work from home due to covid-19. In a Microsoft teams chat a bully had said not to tell Simon we were on teams as they had not activated his account for it. We use a phone system and his number is hidden in there. 

I have tried calling Simon and it appears he has changed his mobile number, I've e-mailed him and he just replies if its work related 

I'm worried about him, I don't know what to do. No one at work seems to care/realise whats going on. I want to show him we are colleagues and friends and he isn't alone. I was thinking even though we are in a form of lockdown still of going round with some cans and having a socially distant drink. I just don't know what to do.

Please help!

[d0nnivain]

My heavens.  These bullies sound horrid.  Where are the bosses in all of this?  Do they know people are leaving a worker off teams?   Why are they letting this happen?  If they know & aren't doing anything I think you & Simon need to look for other jobs because these bullies are not being contained.  

As for breaking into his phone that has to be some sort of crime.   Simon should have gotten the police involved.  I don't understand why his GF didn't believe him or change her #.  If Simon knew he was the victim of an attack you would think he would offer to change her phone #

[Piddy]

One lessen I learned a long time ago is you need to stand up to bullies.  In every case at work where I encountered a bully (even a boss), when I stood up to them they backed down and most tried to become friendly afterward.  If your bosses don't know you need to tell them what's going on.  This type behavior is intolerable and needs to stop.  

This just happened recently to me.  We sometimes meet and park at our former Golf Club and go play at other courses.  One of the maintenance guys known to be gruff and a bully type approached us awhile back and said we shouldn't park there.  We know the owner and head pro very well and they don't mind.

  Long story short, he recently approached me again in my car and said someone told the the owner and he doesn't want us to park there.  I confronted him and said, it wasn't you was it (who told the owner)?  Because it's coincidental that you told us we shouldn't park here and now the owner said we can't park here. 

He backed down and said it wasn't him etc. and all of a sudden he's calling me by my name and being nice.  And when the other guys showed up he went out of his way to be nice to them as well and say it wasn't him who told the owner etc.  Now when I see him he's all friendly etc..

Moral of the story.  All bullies need to be stood up to.  They prey on the weak.  Stand up to them and they'll back down.

Edited June 24, 2020 by Piddy

[Davbaxt]

Thanks for your replies

The managers do know, they say "Oh it can't be true" or say "they wouldn't do that".

Simons girlfriend was hounded and a lot of fake things was sent to her, I know SImon offered to change her number, as for getting in to the phone, Police here won't touch it unfortunately.

Simon did stand up to them, they retaliated and he got furloughed for 3 weeks. The same happened to me as I also said it was wrong. one of the bullies forced who was going on furlough.

We are looking for new jobs, but regardless I just want to let SImon know he does a friend at work and in general.

[Davbaxt]

To add

As for teams, our boss thinks believes is a licensing issue, (We don't have enough) however new starters have had Office365 accounts created since this "issue"

[d0nnivain]

Your bosses sound like morons.   It's time to work some place else.  

[Davbaxt]

4 minutes ago, d0nnivain said:

Your bosses sound like morons.   It's time to work some place else.  

They are, Once lockdown is over I will be finding another job!

[Libby1]

This is extreme.  These people have interfered in his personal life, they broke up his relationship and they're being supported by management.  It's very saddening to read that Simon said "I perfectly understand, I wouldn't talk to me neither."  These horrible people have probably worn his self esteem down to nothing

Just a few questions:

1. You mention it's a small office.  Is it a small branch of a larger business, or is the business itself a small one?   You don't need to give exact numbers but, for instance, are there more than 30 or so people working there?

2. Do you and Simon have a written employment contract?  If there's an employees' manual, this counts as a written employment contract.

3. Have either/both of you worked there for more than two years?

I think you should probably ask moderation if they'd edit your post right down to remove identifying details.  A lot of what you've written is pretty specific and you don't want to add to your/Simon's woes by having any of your colleagues.  I wouldn't worry too much about it as the chances of them seeing it are realistically very low - but if the mods are prepared to edit it down I do think it would be a good idea.

 

[preraph]

I don't know what agency you have in the UK to report this too, but you surely have one.  In the US, it's the EEOC.  Anyone can go in there and file a written complaint on their employer.  In this case it would be "hostile work environment."  They will ask a response from the company and if not resolved, advise you to get a lawyer, which is what he should have already done, short of walking out on the job entirely, which is what he should do since they're all in on it for the most part.  Of course they know what's going on.  But he should file a complain (or YOU can) to put it down so that in the future, the more people complain, the more pressure will be put on the company.  

I filed a complaint once and immediately, the EEOC rep said, "We've gotten complaints about that company before." 

 

If this company is owned by a larger one, find out the owner, and contact that person.  I doubt they do.  I did work at a place once where you could report anonymously.  Contact the owner of this company.  If you want to do it anonymously, do so.  Owners won't usually like to hear something like this and it may make them at least quietly keep an ear to the ground so it could take a long while, but I've not yet met an owner who didn't listen on something like this.  

Edited June 24, 2020 by preraph

[Libby1]

1 hour ago, preraph said:

I don't know what agency you have in the UK to report this too, but you surely have one.  In the US, it's the EEOC.  Anyone can go in there and file a written complaint on their employer.  In this case it would be "hostile work environment."  They will ask a response from the company and if not resolved, advise you to get a lawyer, which is what he should have already done, short of walking out on the job entirely, which is what he should do since they're all in on it for the most part.  Of course they know what's going on.  But he should file a complain (or YOU can) to put it down so that in the future, the more people complain, the more pressure will be put on the company.  

 

In the UK, what you'd generally do with a situation like this (assuming you had evidence) would be first of all to raise a grievance within the company.  If the company doesn't uphold the grievance, and they tend not to, then the next step is to resign and raise a claim of constructive dismissal...but none of this should be done without seeking some guidance from a lawyer.  Also, unless a person has been subject to some detriment for falling into a protected category (they were discriminated against in some way) then they need to have been with the employer for 2 years in order to raise a claim.  That's where a lot of people fall down.

After leaving, they've got up to 3 months to raise an action in the employment tribunal, but before they do that they have to notify a body called ACAS (Advice, Conciliation & Arbitration Scheme).  ACAS then speak to both parties to see if they can broker any sort of agreement, and that can last for a month or so (the deadline to raise the claim being extended for however long it takes).  If ACAS can't broker an agreement, then they raise the action in the Employment Tribunal.   Actions can be raised in court, of course, but the Tribunal is specifically geared towards employment matters and tends to be cheaper.  Unlike court, though, the successful party doesn't tend to be awarded the legal expenses...the reason being that in theory the Employment Tribunal is supposed to be easy enough for people to act for themselves.  For the same reason, it's hard for people to get legal aid for representation in a Tribunal.  In practice, that's ridiculous as employment law is one of the more complex areas. 

[Davbaxt]

11 hours ago, Libby1 said:

This is extreme.  These people have interfered in his personal life, they broke up his relationship and they're being supported by management.  It's very saddening to read that Simon said "I perfectly understand, I wouldn't talk to me neither."  These horrible people have probably worn his self esteem down to nothing

Just a few questions:

1. You mention it's a small office.  Is it a small branch of a larger business, or is the business itself a small one?   You don't need to give exact numbers but, for instance, are there more than 30 or so people working there?

2. Do you and Simon have a written employment contract?  If there's an employees' manual, this counts as a written employment contract.

3. Have either/both of you worked there for more than two years?

I think you should probably ask moderation if they'd edit your post right down to remove identifying details.  A lot of what you've written is pretty specific and you don't want to add to your/Simon's woes by having any of your colleagues.  I wouldn't worry too much about it as the chances of them seeing it are realistically very low - but if the mods are prepared to edit it down I do think it would be a good idea.

 

Simon isn't his name, Its as far from his name as you can get.

1) Its an office part of a larger firm, Less than 20 in our office.

2) Yes we do, not that its followed in any way

3) No

 

[Davbaxt]

11 hours ago, preraph said:

I don't know what agency you have in the UK to report this too, but you surely have one.  In the US, it's the EEOC.  Anyone can go in there and file a written complaint on their employer.  In this case it would be "hostile work environment."  They will ask a response from the company and if not resolved, advise you to get a lawyer, which is what he should have already done, short of walking out on the job entirely, which is what he should do since they're all in on it for the most part.  Of course they know what's going on.  But he should file a complain (or YOU can) to put it down so that in the future, the more people complain, the more pressure will be put on the company.  

I filed a complaint once and immediately, the EEOC rep said, "We've gotten complaints about that company before." 

 

If this company is owned by a larger one, find out the owner, and contact that person.  I doubt they do.  I did work at a place once where you could report anonymously.  Contact the owner of this company.  If you want to do it anonymously, do so.  Owners won't usually like to hear something like this and it may make them at least quietly keep an ear to the ground so it could take a long while, but I've not yet met an owner who didn't listen on something like this.  

One of the owners if you can get an e-mail to him without it being intercepted by his PA, the other owner is really good friends with one of the bullies. 

[preraph]

Well it sounds like then you would need to call the owner. You can do it from out of the office. Or certified mail.

[Libby1]

11 hours ago, Davbaxt said:

Simon isn't his name, Its as far from his name as you can get.

1) Its an office part of a larger firm, Less than 20 in our office.

2) Yes we do, not that its followed in any way

3) No

 

You're probably aware that statutory rights don't kick in until the person has two years service under their belt, therefore going down the grievance then claim for constructive dismissal route is unlikely to be open to Simon.  Does he have any sort of disability that you're aware of?  This could include a long term mental health problem.  Let's say he did have a mental health problem that resulted in him unusual ways, that he's being picked on for.  Then there's a possibility of disability discrimination.  But there really would need to be a pretty specific mental health problem that he's been diagnosed with, and the bad behaviour towards him would have to be related to that health condition. 

If he doesn't have two years service and he doesn't belong to any protected category which would help him around that 2 year rule (provided he was being picked on for belonging to that protected category) then there's probably no remedy available to him via an Employment Tribunal.  By "protected categories" I mean discrimination he received as a result of his age, any disability, race, religion, gender, sexual orientation or gender reassignment.  Another option is if he's being picked on for whistleblowing (eg on a health and safety matter or a criminal offence).  But note that raising a complaint about bullying is not classed as whistleblowing - even though bullying can have an impact on people's health and safety. 

If none of the above applies, that leaves the option of a personal injury action...but PI actions are generally raised on a no win no fee basis, and solicitors working on that basis won't take a case on unless they're pretty certain they're on to a winner.  So the chances of a firm taking on a bullying case on a no win no fee basis are very low unfortunately.

Are you and Simon members of any union?   If not, it may be that there's a union out there  you could join, notwithstanding that you seem to be working in the private sector.  If you google TUC, you'll see an entry "find a union for you" and that will take you through a series of steps which will help you establish whether there's a union the two of you could join.  That could place both of you in a stronger position in terms of tackling the employer for failing to do anything about these bullies.