I don't eat real food: Getting back into the mindset and breaking the habit of junkfood patterns

[Ellener]

@Lorenza what makes you happy?

[amaysngrace]

12 hours ago, Lorenza said:

Been vegan for several years, was not a great experience especially towards the end, but getting back to it for a week might be fun. I used to cook way more as a vegan

Being vegan is great in that you read labels closely.  I have a yummy pesto recipe if you’d like to try and it’s simple to make.

Edited July 7, 2020 by amaysngrace

[Ruby Slippers]

42 minutes ago, Lorenza said:

Guys, I know how to cook, wanted to talk more or less about the phychology behind not wanting to eat healthy when you are alone

It's definitely easier to eat the way you're eating than to eat healthy. But in the long run, a healthy lifestyle pays off. The main reasons I eat healthy are:

• I feel better
• I look better, am thinner and more fit, skin is more radiant
• I'm healthier, both in the short and long term

Once you start eating healthy, you'll probably feel the effects of even a day or two of not eating well - bloating, stomach issues, less energy, etc.

[Weezy1973]

2 hours ago, Lorenza said:

Guys, I know how to cook, wanted to talk more or less about the phychology behind not wanting to eat healthy when you are alone posted this topic in self-improvement but it got moved by admins

So when I was going through a long patch of being single, after work often consisted of cracking a beer or three and ordering pizza or whatever other random junk food you could think of. Usually I’d spend the evenings with Netflix, unenthusiastically browsing OLD profiles, drinking beer and eating junk. Over and over.

 

It was tough to kick that routine. But I did it in steps. I don’t like cooking from a cookbook so I learned a few simple techniques from YouTube. I would cook really simple meals, listen to good music and still have a few beers. The actual cooking process became fun. It was more about the ritual than the actual taste of the food. And I made sure what I cooked was healthy.

I made things as easy as possible. Didn’t buy junk food when grocery shopping, deleted delivery numbers from my phone, bought salad prewashed etc. 

And now, close to ten years later (although now married as well) still eat clean and do all the cooking and grocery shopping for my family. The key to change is cutting the steps down so they’re easier to do rather than doing a full on lifestyle change full on. 
 

And I still have a couple beers while I cook.

[amaysngrace]

I don’t know why you don’t value yourself enough to eat well but when I use to eat terribly it was either due to stress or low self-worth.

Everyone is different though so I don’t know why you’re eating that way.  Are you exhausted from working so much?  Sad about something?  Feeling empty maybe?  

[FMW]

On 7/6/2020 at 12:27 PM, Lorenza said:

I don't know how to get back to that past mind set.

Well that's a very personal issue you have to work out for yourself, we all have different experiences with lack of motivation, but unfortunately they aren't cookie cutter copies of each other.  

I think most of the suggestions you received focused on what might motivate you, that primarily being FEELING better.  If you don't put garbage in, then you won't feel like garbage and want to just keep stuffing it in.  The "directions" or suggestions for what to eat were mainly pointing out it doesn't take much time so don't let the time factor hold you back from giving it a shot.  It's kind of like the egg and the chicken, which one comes first - the "bad" eating or the bad moods.

Feeling peaceful doesn't necessarily equate with being happy.  It just means you're existing and flowing along without drama, but maybe not feeling the joy in life.  As I noted, unfortunately we can't really tell you what the answer is, we can just throw out possibilities and you can either consider them or dismiss them.  

Edited July 7, 2020 by FMW
spelling

[Interstellar]

there are several approaches you can do for example: if you love donuts make protein donuts instead,  tons of recipes online. since you really don’t feel like cooking then another approach I would do is space out your eating. eat those junk foods you love but space it out. only 500 calories or less every 2-3 hours for example. six times a day or whatever. eventually you’ll end up getting sick of it then you’ll start slowly cutting back and start with adding more protein and healthy filling foods. don’t go over 2000 calories a day or eat more than your burn when you’re in a junk food phase. 

the biggest thing is really figuring out the mental aspect that works for you. everything starts with the mind. what works for me is deprivation. intermittent fasting. i was a skinny child so I stopped eating at 9 pm, then pushed it back to 8 pm. now, i realized that I need to be eating protein per body weight so I simply became more conscious of that when I eat. I have to eat to sustain my performance in the gym and to maintain my strength so I try to be aware of it. so it’s a matter of finding out your why and being consciously aware of your purpose in eating, in living.

[Lorenza]

My junk eating patterns are getting out of control. I noticed, that I only feel happy when I'm eating something unhealthy. Righy now, nothing is better than getting in front of the tv after coming back from the store with a whole bunch of junkfood in hand and devouring all the goods. Normal food makes me depressed, I feel like I'm wasting time eating it when I could be eating something that makes me feel good instead. I found my old food diary and it was pretty shocking to read how clean I used to eat. I'm nowhere near that mindset. 

However I'm realising this mostly depends of a severe lack of self-fullfilement at the moment which can't be helped due to the current situation. I need a social and creative outlet and when I am unable to get it I'm compensating with food.  Lack of developement in the relationship area adds upp too. A lot of us are in the same boat mentally, of course. 

[Wiseman2]

4 minutes ago, Lorenza said:

 after coming back from the store with a whole bunch of junkfood in hand and devouring all the goods. Normal food makes me depressed, I feel like I'm wasting time eating it when I could be eating something that makes me feel good instead. I found my old food diary and it was pretty shocking to read how clean I used to eat. I'm nowhere near that mindset. 

However I'm realising this mostly depends of a severe lack of self-fullfilement at the moment which can't be helped due to the current situation. I need a social and creative outlet and when I am unable to get it I'm compensating with food.  Lack of developement in the relationship area adds upp too. A lot of us are in the same boat mentally, of course. 

Have you checked in with a doctor for an evaluation of your endocrine system, general health and most of any mood disorders? perhaps a therapist would provide someone to talk to to while you sort things out. In the mean time do you mean buckets of chicken or the occasional drive through burger meal?

[lana-banana]

The thing about junk food is that it's designed to activate pleasure sensors. Lots of preservatives are created with the intent of triggering specific receptors that kick off dopamine and serotonin, to say nothing of the effects of refined sugar. Lab rats have an easier time quitting cocaine than they do sugar! If you are feeling especially lonely and unfulfilled right now, it's no wonder that junk food is making you happiest; you have nothing else that comes close in comparison, especially in quarantine situations.

It seems like you recognize what the problem is, which is like 50% of it. The other 50% is actually doing the work. While I agree talking to a mental health professional would be a very good idea, there are a couple of other things you should do in the meantime:

1) Nix the junk food. You gotta go cold turkey for at least a week. Yes, it will be awful, because it's legitimately addictive. But you have to get yourself "clean", so to speak.

2) Swap it for fancy yoga goddess salads, brown rice sushi, yogurt bowls, wraps. Food that it is aesthetically pleasing increases your enjoyment of the experience, so now is the time to splurge on beautiful salads.

3) Monitor sugar intake. Sugar is by far the most likely to wreck your hormone levels and can have the most intense impacts on your mood and well-being. As a woman you want to stay at 40g or below per day, which means you will also have to watch your fruit intake. While refined sugar is worst for you, sugar is sugar is sugar, and you will get the same blood sugar spike from an acai bowl with 40g of sugar as you would a Frappuccino. 

When I had severe depressive episodes, I cut basically all refined carbohydrates (= sugar!) and ate lots of salads, and roast vegetables with olive oil. For me, the metabolic and emotional chaos that eating ice cream or donuts caused was like a bender for alcoholics. It can be tempting because the short-term rewards feel so good but it's not worth feeling atrocious the next day, or the week after. 

You do not have to start cooking again until you feel ready. It's clear that you have made a link between cooking and being in a relationship/feeling loved, so of course don't push yourself into things that are causing you pain. But what you will eventually need to do is start building new memories and associations, and get it into your head that cooking can be an act of self-love, a thing you do only for yourself. A professional can help you work on that.

[Lorenza]

On 8/28/2020 at 2:40 PM, lana-banana said:

The thing about junk food is that it's designed to activate pleasure sensors. Lots of preservatives are created with the intent of triggering specific receptors that kick off dopamine and serotonin, to say nothing of the effects of refined sugar. Lab rats have an easier time quitting cocaine than they do sugar! If you are feeling especially lonely and unfulfilled right now, it's no wonder that junk food is making you happiest; you have nothing else that comes close in comparison, especially in quarantine situations.

It seems like you recognize what the problem is, which is like 50% of it. The other 50% is actually doing the work. While I agree talking to a mental health professional would be a very good idea, there are a couple of other things you should do in the meantime:

1) Nix the junk food. You gotta go cold turkey for at least a week. Yes, it will be awful, because it's legitimately addictive. But you have to get yourself "clean", so to speak.

2) Swap it for fancy yoga goddess salads, brown rice sushi, yogurt bowls, wraps. Food that it is aesthetically pleasing increases your enjoyment of the experience, so now is the time to splurge on beautiful salads.

3) Monitor sugar intake. Sugar is by far the most likely to wreck your hormone levels and can have the most intense impacts on your mood and well-being. As a woman you want to stay at 40g or below per day, which means you will also have to watch your fruit intake. While refined sugar is worst for you, sugar is sugar is sugar, and you will get the same blood sugar spike from an acai bowl with 40g of sugar as you would a Frappuccino. 

When I had severe depressive episodes, I cut basically all refined carbohydrates (= sugar!) and ate lots of salads, and roast vegetables with olive oil. For me, the metabolic and emotional chaos that eating ice cream or donuts caused was like a bender for alcoholics. It can be tempting because the short-term rewards feel so good but it's not worth feeling atrocious the next day, or the week after. 

You do not have to start cooking again until you feel ready. It's clear that you have made a link between cooking and being in a relationship/feeling loved, so of course don't push yourself into things that are causing you pain. But what you will eventually need to do is start building new memories and associations, and get it into your head that cooking can be an act of self-love, a thing you do only for yourself. A professional can help you work on that.

Thank you, Lana, that was super helpful. You are so right about the salads, they could probably help me out to still feel like I'm indulging myself and get that happy feelings, but it would be with healthier things instead. Also thanks for understanding about the cooking part 

[Dork Vader]

Give up the junk food immediately. You might not notice it now, but you will. I'm 36 and have peripheral artery disease from smoking and eating to much junk food. I can't even begin to tell you how much I regret it. I have a difficult time standing on my feet for more than 2 hours. If I sit on a hard surface putting pressure on my legs, my feet start to turn blue/purple. That's not even half of the symptoms. I now have to eat healthy, it's literally a matter of life and death for me. 

The not knowing how to cook is just an excuse, it's one that I used. I also used the "I hate shopping" excuse. Honestly it's not that difficult to cook. Keep it simple at first, find some recipes on the internet that are healthy make a list of what you'll need go shopping and give it a try. When you're first learning how to cook it will more than likely take longer for you to cook the meal. The food probably won't be that great (at first).. I was over cooking my chicken and under cooking rice my first few attempts. But I worked through it, now I can cook some decent meals and have trimmed my fat consumption to below what my doctors told me was the maximum I should consume.

You might slip up here and there with the junk food, but it's no excuse to completely give up on eating healthy. You will be absolutely amazed at how much better you feel when you give it up. You'll have more energy, you'll feel better overall and so much more. 

[Lorenza]

On 9/10/2020 at 5:09 PM, Dork Vader said:

Give up the junk food immediately. You might not notice it now, but you will. I'm 36 and have peripheral artery disease from smoking and eating to much junk food. I can't even begin to tell you how much I regret it. I have a difficult time standing on my feet for more than 2 hours. If I sit on a hard surface putting pressure on my legs, my feet start to turn blue/purple. That's not even half of the symptoms. I now have to eat healthy, it's literally a matter of life and death for me. 

The not knowing how to cook is just an excuse, it's one that I used. I also used the "I hate shopping" excuse. Honestly it's not that difficult to cook. Keep it simple at first, find some recipes on the internet that are healthy make a list of what you'll need go shopping and give it a try. When you're first learning how to cook it will more than likely take longer for you to cook the meal. The food probably won't be that great (at first).. I was over cooking my chicken and under cooking rice my first few attempts. But I worked through it, now I can cook some decent meals and have trimmed my fat consumption to below what my doctors told me was the maximum I should consume.

You might slip up here and there with the junk food, but it's no excuse to completely give up on eating healthy. You will be absolutely amazed at how much better you feel when you give it up. You'll have more energy, you'll feel better overall and so much more. 

Sorry to hear about your condition 😕

I mentioned that I know how to cook, and very well at that. I used to make thai and japanese dishes from scratch, risotto, fancy soups, curries, nice desserts like pannacotta etc. My first two years as single I still cooked as a habit. Nowadays, whenever I cook, I feel so empty. It feels so pointless. Nobody is going to taste it anyway, just me. And somehow anything I make tastes so bland to me. 

Now when people come over, it's a different story. I had a birthday party in summer and made a feast for the guests. Made my own birthday cake. When my cousin stayed over I cooked for her. 

I remember living alone as a teenager when I was 15-17 and my parents worked abroad. Alone at my apt I would eat absolute crap. With a friend staying over or at my grandma's house I was interested in learning  to cook all kinds of dishes. But would never make them while on my own. I still repeat those patterns. My dad has horrible eating habits when he's on his own as well, I seem to have inherited the way he deals with loneliness psychologically... and his super fast metabolism. 

But since Lana's post I've been eating lots of salads, seems like indulging with salads instead of junkfood is going to stick with me. 

Edited September 11, 2020 by Lorenza

[bobjon]

OP, I still have not figured out if you are a man or woman?  Regardless, junk food is a "therapy" of sorts.  One that will eventually kill you.  You have no idea how many "vegans" I have met that are both hungry all the time, and convinced they are healthy.  Unless you have some major issue with other food groups, I have other directions to go.  Vegan ain't one of them.....

I am NOT going to even talk about the foods because you apparently have a mental issue in wanting junk.  Only thing I can tell you confidence is you are likely building quite a fatty liver, which is a result of massive amounts of Fructose, and you will eventually get Diabetes II.  

What I VERY HIGHLY recommend, is joining a gym!  I NEVER advocate for people to do this because it is a 100% certainty you can get in the shape of your life right at home, with basic stuff, but I am looking at the mental aspect of this!  This is about 90% the reason people go to a gym!  Eye candy and people use it as a dating pool.  I am not saying date, BUT I think this can get you motivated, which is a start.  

As you move through this phase, which will probably suck, it will change your hormones!  I AM NOT KIDDING!!! This is 100% science.  You can either waste money on doctors and the pills they put you on, or you can just trust me as a stranger that this is sort of my field!  If you do this right, you will go through about 2-3 weeks of "WTF", then your body will start to adapt.  These hormones will sneak in and you will start to feel this "I feel pretty good" thing.  many people get addicted to the gym, and I highly recommend it!!!  Again I HATE gyms, but I really do think this will help you.  

As a side effect, your body will start to crave the nutrients it needs and I would be happy to help in that respect, or get some other pro help.  Trainers just think they know nutrition, so I would open the door to a real nutritionist, which some gyms do have.  

One thing I will tell you is I have seen a L O T of people think they are doing something on that stationary bike for 2 hrs.  It helps and is a great start or cardio WO, but in your case, I would push towards resistance (weight) training, and probably pretty soon because I can get hormones moving much faster.  

I think your options are pills or weights.  You decide but one will make you healthy, the other will make you less healthy.  Most SSRIs cause weight gain as a side effect, which ain't cool.  

[Lorenza]

9 hours ago, bobjon said:

OP, I still have not figured out if you are a man or woman?  Regardless, junk food is a "therapy" of sorts.  One that will eventually kill you.  You have no idea how many "vegans" I have met that are both hungry all the time, and convinced they are healthy.  Unless you have some major issue with other food groups, I have other directions to go.  Vegan ain't one of them.....

I am NOT going to even talk about the foods because you apparently have a mental issue in wanting junk.  Only thing I can tell you confidence is you are likely building quite a fatty liver, which is a result of massive amounts of Fructose, and you will eventually get Diabetes II.  

What I VERY HIGHLY recommend, is joining a gym!  I NEVER advocate for people to do this because it is a 100% certainty you can get in the shape of your life right at home, with basic stuff, but I am looking at the mental aspect of this!  This is about 90% the reason people go to a gym!  Eye candy and people use it as a dating pool.  I am not saying date, BUT I think this can get you motivated, which is a start.  

As you move through this phase, which will probably suck, it will change your hormones!  I AM NOT KIDDING!!! This is 100% science.  You can either waste money on doctors and the pills they put you on, or you can just trust me as a stranger that this is sort of my field!  If you do this right, you will go through about 2-3 weeks of "WTF", then your body will start to adapt.  These hormones will sneak in and you will start to feel this "I feel pretty good" thing.  many people get addicted to the gym, and I highly recommend it!!!  Again I HATE gyms, but I really do think this will help you.  

As a side effect, your body will start to crave the nutrients it needs and I would be happy to help in that respect, or get some other pro help.  Trainers just think they know nutrition, so I would open the door to a real nutritionist, which some gyms do have.  

One thing I will tell you is I have seen a L O T of people think they are doing something on that stationary bike for 2 hrs.  It helps and is a great start or cardio WO, but in your case, I would push towards resistance (weight) training, and probably pretty soon because I can get hormones moving much faster.  

I think your options are pills or weights.  You decide but one will make you healthy, the other will make you less healthy.  Most SSRIs cause weight gain as a side effect, which ain't cool.  

I'm a 31 y o woman, my bmi is 21. I am not vegan, although I've been in the past. 

In my country you have to wear a mask at the gym, so the popularity is at all time low at the moment. When corona crap is over, I will join a gym for sure. Or more likely some kind of group training, it's much more fun. I do walk at least 10k steps a day though. 

[DarrenB]

Have you considered regular online coaching sessions?

More than half of my own clients are still reluctant to get back in the gym, but have preferred virtual training over the course of the past few months.

There's plenty of full body workouts and exercises that do no revolve around the use equipment.