Tiz Posted July 11, 2020 Share Posted July 11, 2020 (edited) So, met girl on Tinder. Had sex the first night. We had texted back and forth frequently her initiating mainly nude pics etc. She was adamant about not wanting anyone needy and although the term FWB was not used she acted as though this is what she was looking for. Texting continued back and for daily and we made plans to meet up on the 4th. I went to her house and we had crazy sex again. I left early the next morning and she texted immediately when I got home and after a few back and forths she asked out of nowhere, "Do you think I'm awful?" I replied, "Heck no." not really inquiring why she was asking. I had asked her the day before if she wanted to hang out later in the week because I thought I had some days off and she said yeah but let's make sure we do it later in the week and I believe Thursday was mentioned. The texting frequency kind of starting dropping off over the next few days and on Thursday I texted her that I thought I had work off but I didn't and was she free Sunday night. She responded, "Awee I'm not sure about Sunday right now but we can chit chat about it." I responded, "thumbs up emoji Mmmk". I don't like her answer, and I'm not really too adept at these kind of relationships, so what are people's opinions about her response and how to proceed before Sunday? This would be in the context of a f*** buddy response only. Edited July 11, 2020 by Tiz More information needed Link to post Share on other sites
amaysngrace Posted July 11, 2020 Share Posted July 11, 2020 You’re not the only game in town and she may have better plans is how I take it to mean. 2 Link to post Share on other sites
Giovane Posted July 11, 2020 Share Posted July 11, 2020 (edited) 52 minutes ago, Tiz said: I don't like her answer You may not like it, but she does not need to justify her decision towards you. 52 minutes ago, Tiz said: I'm not really too adept at these kind of relationships The way I see it, you don't have much of a "relationship" that would put you in a position to have a say in her schedule. If you want to have a shot at building a relationship, my advice would be to hang back and wait. Otherwise you might come across as jealous or clingy, which is off-putting. Edited July 11, 2020 by Giovane 3 Link to post Share on other sites
kendahke Posted July 11, 2020 Share Posted July 11, 2020 1 hour ago, Tiz said: so what are people's opinions about her response and how to proceed before Sunday? Chat about it... if she doesn't want to hit it, then don't hit it--but she's not your girlfriend, so you really can't have you nose out of joint about her having a scheduling conflict. You're asking boyfriend questions, not FWB questions. 2 Link to post Share on other sites
smackie9 Posted July 11, 2020 Share Posted July 11, 2020 She's doin others buddy.....she hit it and now she's quitting it. You don't like this? Then quit her. Link to post Share on other sites
rjc149 Posted July 11, 2020 Share Posted July 11, 2020 She's looking at this as a casual fling, so you should too. If you start pursuing something more, this will repel her. She even warned you to not do this. Release your expectations. Detach yourself emotionally. Don't expect this to go anywhere, because it won't. You're in her rotation, and it's your turn right now. Next week/month it'll be the next guy's turn. And so forth. Make your peace with this now. This is the type of low self esteem woman active on Tinder, banging a hit parade of strangers off the internet a few hours after meeting them, then sending them nude pics and asking them for moral reassurance. Sunday late morning, send her a text "hey, what's up?" and go from there. That's what I would do. Sunday may be free, or it may be some other guy's turn with her. 1 Link to post Share on other sites
Emilie Jolie Posted July 11, 2020 Share Posted July 11, 2020 18 hours ago, Tiz said: She responded, "Awee I'm not sure about Sunday right now but we can chit chat about it." I responded, "thumbs up emoji Mmmk". I don't like her answer, and I'm not really too adept at these kind of relationships, so what are people's opinions about her response and how to proceed before Sunday? This would be in the context of a f*** buddy response only. I'd leave it to her to come back to you, keeping in mind that she might not. The bolded suggests you are not in a relationship, so you need to act accordingly. I don't really know what the parameters of a f*** buddy thing involves for lack of personal experience (not judging though!), but assume it is a spur of the moment, zero strings attached, zero expectations, going with the flow kind of thing that can stop at any given moment without notice. Afraid you are already far too invested, Tiz. Take many, many steps back and do other things would be the best thing to do right now, in my opinion. 1 Link to post Share on other sites
Cali4Dude Posted July 11, 2020 Share Posted July 11, 2020 Yeah sounds like she got a BDO(bigger-dick-offer). Sorry dude. Link to post Share on other sites
Author Tiz Posted July 12, 2020 Author Share Posted July 12, 2020 7 hours ago, Emilie Jolie said: I'd leave it to her to come back to you, keeping in mind that she might not. The bolded suggests you are not in a relationship, so you need to act accordingly. I don't really know what the parameters of a f*** buddy thing involves for lack of personal experience (not judging though!), but assume it is a spur of the moment, zero strings attached, zero expectations, going with the flow kind of thing that can stop at any given moment without notice. Afraid you are already far too invested, Tiz. Take many, many steps back and do other things would be the best thing to do right now, in my opinion. Excellent advice and I was already in that mindset, but I like to hear it from others. No doubt I'm not the only game in town although I already knew this just by the way she was talking about other guys she was riding the carousel with. Funny how it goes from hot to cold real quick! Ahhh the wonderful adventures of Tinder. 1 Link to post Share on other sites
elaine567 Posted July 12, 2020 Share Posted July 12, 2020 On 7/11/2020 at 1:33 AM, Tiz said: I left early the next morning and she texted immediately when I got home and after a few back and forths she asked out of nowhere, "Do you think I'm awful?" I think this may be significant. 1 Link to post Share on other sites
Author Tiz Posted July 12, 2020 Author Share Posted July 12, 2020 4 hours ago, elaine567 said: I think this may be significant. Absolutely it is. I have my own ideas, but please expand. Link to post Share on other sites
kendahke Posted July 13, 2020 Share Posted July 13, 2020 On 7/12/2020 at 7:53 AM, Tiz said: Absolutely it is. I have my own ideas, but please expand. What are your expectations of her at this stage of your interaction with her? That will inform a lot. Link to post Share on other sites
JTSW Posted July 13, 2020 Share Posted July 13, 2020 On 7/11/2020 at 1:33 AM, Tiz said: I'm not really too adept at these kind of relationships It was never a relationship. It was just sex, nothing more. Thats all she wanted and you weren't the only one. Link to post Share on other sites
Author Tiz Posted July 14, 2020 Author Share Posted July 14, 2020 16 hours ago, kendahke said: What are your expectations of her at this stage of your interaction with her? That will inform a lot. Positively I don't have any expectations. I definitely don't chase in situations like these. It was fun for a few times and that was it. I haven't heard back from her, and if I extend an offer to hang out and it's turned down or I'm given an ambiguous answer she can come to me if she wants to meet again. Link to post Share on other sites
kendahke Posted July 14, 2020 Share Posted July 14, 2020 7 hours ago, Tiz said: Positively I don't have any expectations. Good. Make sure to remove any thoughts of 'relationship' or expectations a boyfriend would have from your mind. A lot of what you've written above makes it sound like you were thinking way further ahead with her than what has presently fallen out in experience at your feet. Link to post Share on other sites
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