chillii Posted July 15, 2020 Share Posted July 15, 2020 Sounds like your not going then huh , sorry . We went through many a false starts back when . However if things open up again meantime yeah l'd agree that he should offer to fly you but then again my ex could fly free so maybe you can too. He should really want you to come though whatever the case. Link to post Share on other sites
Mystery4u Posted July 15, 2020 Share Posted July 15, 2020 18 hours ago, Sarah_K said: He is male and I can't book as there isn't a reciprocal air bridge for covid No going to the UK if I could get there I wouldn't need to quarantine but would here. Only if i got an exemption which I wouldn't That's why I said 'as soon as you are able to'. I'm also in a LDR and unable to visit my girlfriend due to entry restrictions but as soon as they are lifted I will be booking the first flight out there. Link to post Share on other sites
Author Sarah_K Posted July 15, 2020 Author Share Posted July 15, 2020 7 hours ago, Mystery4u said: That's why I said 'as soon as you are able to'. I'm also in a LDR and unable to visit my girlfriend due to entry restrictions but as soon as they are lifted I will be booking the first flight out there. He rang me to say (and woke me!) that he misses me and as soon as he can get a flight he will come to me as he wants me to save my money. Link to post Share on other sites
hippychick3 Posted July 15, 2020 Share Posted July 15, 2020 16 minutes ago, Sarah_K said: He rang me to say (and woke me!) that he misses me and as soon as he can get a flight he will come to me as he wants me to save my money. Okay, after reading through this thread, it sounds to me like he doesn’t want you there. I have a feeling he won’t be booking a flight anytime soon. I do not agree with going out of your way to visit someone who isn’t super excited to see you and will make every accommodation possible to make that happen. 1 Link to post Share on other sites
ExpatInItaly Posted July 16, 2020 Share Posted July 16, 2020 16 hours ago, Sarah_K said: He rang me to say (and woke me!) that he misses me and as soon as he can get a flight he will come to me as he wants me to save my money. This is a much better idea, given your current employment status. Is he currently working remotely? Link to post Share on other sites
Author Sarah_K Posted July 16, 2020 Author Share Posted July 16, 2020 3 minutes ago, ExpatInItaly said: This is a much better idea, given your current employment status. Is he currently working remotely? He is currently working in Berlin should be back in the UK next week then I don't know Link to post Share on other sites
ExpatInItaly Posted July 16, 2020 Share Posted July 16, 2020 5 hours ago, Sarah_K said: He is currently working in Berlin should be back in the UK next week then I don't know I only ask because it sounds like it might be a while before he's actually able to fly to you, unless he's got some vacation time coming up. Link to post Share on other sites
Author Sarah_K Posted July 16, 2020 Author Share Posted July 16, 2020 I've been up most of the night. He rang me earlier (and when he rings in the night its serious) hes injured his hand whilst working and was waiting in the medical centre for an ambulance. I know I can't leave Australia but I really want to be with him now. Link to post Share on other sites
Author Sarah_K Posted July 16, 2020 Author Share Posted July 16, 2020 I feel useless sat here! Link to post Share on other sites
Author Sarah_K Posted July 17, 2020 Author Share Posted July 17, 2020 Boyfriend is being strange he keeps apologising to me for being a terrible person.They had to operate on his hand/arm Link to post Share on other sites
ExpatInItaly Posted July 17, 2020 Share Posted July 17, 2020 (edited) 59 minutes ago, Sarah_K said: Boyfriend is being strange he keeps apologising to me for being a terrible person.They had to operate on his hand/arm Being a terrible person...for having done what? Edited July 17, 2020 by ExpatInItaly 1 Link to post Share on other sites
Author Sarah_K Posted July 17, 2020 Author Share Posted July 17, 2020 5 minutes ago, ExpatInItaly said: Being a terrible person...for having done what? I told him I felt he wasn't keen on me coming over Link to post Share on other sites
Author Sarah_K Posted July 17, 2020 Author Share Posted July 17, 2020 I've still not been sleep. I am so worried about him. I feel helpless being on the other side of the world. Link to post Share on other sites
ExpatInItaly Posted July 17, 2020 Share Posted July 17, 2020 1 hour ago, Sarah_K said: I've still not been sleep. I am so worried about him. I feel helpless being on the other side of the world. A lot of people feel your pain, OP. I live abroad and can't get home to see my family right now. The risk and uncertainty is just too great. I have a few friends here whose foreign partners won't be permitted entry into this country any time soon, either. I think all you can do is keep communication open and video chat as much as you can. Hopefully he can come to visit you in the not-so-distant future. Link to post Share on other sites
Author Sarah_K Posted July 17, 2020 Author Share Posted July 17, 2020 32 minutes ago, ExpatInItaly said: A lot of people feel your pain, OP. I live abroad and can't get home to see my family right now. The risk and uncertainty is just too great. I have a few friends here whose foreign partners won't be permitted entry into this country any time soon, either. I think all you can do is keep communication open and video chat as much as you can. Hopefully he can come to visit you in the not-so-distant future. I just want to be there when he comes round from his operation. How do you cope when things are tough and you want to be there because somethings happened? Link to post Share on other sites
ExpatInItaly Posted July 17, 2020 Share Posted July 17, 2020 24 minutes ago, Sarah_K said: I just want to be there when he comes round from his operation. How do you cope when things are tough and you want to be there because somethings happened? As much communication as possible. I have lived abroad for a few years now, so I also have a partner and friends locally (in my adopted country, I mean) who I can turn to when times are rough. This has happened a few times when something serious has transpired with family members at home and I cannot get to them. Once a close member became very ill and passed away quickly before I could get home to say my goodbyes to her, and all I could do was keep in consistent touch with other family members and friends at home to feel connected. The current pandemic has also been very difficult, as I haven't been home since last December don't know when I will be able to see my family again, exactly. But I have hope that it will happen before too long. However, you mentioned a few posts back that you felt your boyfriend was acting strangely. Do you think that's also increasing your anxiety here? The fear that something else is not quite right? Link to post Share on other sites
Author Sarah_K Posted July 17, 2020 Author Share Posted July 17, 2020 37 minutes ago, ExpatInItaly said: As much communication as possible. I have lived abroad for a few years now, so I also have a partner and friends locally (in my adopted country, I mean) who I can turn to when times are rough. This has happened a few times when something serious has transpired with family members at home and I cannot get to them. Once a close member became very ill and passed away quickly before I could get home to say my goodbyes to her, and all I could do was keep in consistent touch with other family members and friends at home to feel connected. The current pandemic has also been very difficult, as I haven't been home since last December don't know when I will be able to see my family again, exactly. But I have hope that it will happen before too long. However, you mentioned a few posts back that you felt your boyfriend was acting strangely. Do you think that's also increasing your anxiety here? The fear that something else is not quite right? I think it is. I have been I spoke to a mutual friend earlier and he has been stressed with work and he said to this mutual that he has been really bad to me over it. He is also upset over missing my 30th and he thinks he is a terrible boyfriend, He sent me an eternity ring but he couldn't be here and hes been beating himself up over it. We had a talk yesterday. and then this happened so I feel very responsible. We have video called since and he said he is a terrible boyfriend. Link to post Share on other sites
ExpatInItaly Posted July 17, 2020 Share Posted July 17, 2020 1 minute ago, Sarah_K said: . We have video called since and he said he is a terrible boyfriend. Maybe it’s the pandemic stress, but I think he’s being a bit dramatic. Unless he’s leaving something out, I don’t see how he’s been terrible or bad to you. Sure , he wasn’t that enthusiastic about you coming to see him, but that’s hardly the horror of horrors it could be. Do you think there’s more he’s not telling you that is making him feel so guilty? Link to post Share on other sites
Author Sarah_K Posted July 17, 2020 Author Share Posted July 17, 2020 1 hour ago, ExpatInItaly said: Maybe it’s the pandemic stress, but I think he’s being a bit dramatic. Unless he’s leaving something out, I don’t see how he’s been terrible or bad to you. Sure , he wasn’t that enthusiastic about you coming to see him, but that’s hardly the horror of horrors it could be. Do you think there’s more he’s not telling you that is making him feel so guilty? I know he hasn't told me everything about work. He is under a lot of stress and I know his manager is trying to make him rush jobs. I think its more pandemic stress than anything. Link to post Share on other sites
Author Sarah_K Posted July 18, 2020 Author Share Posted July 18, 2020 I managed to get a few hours sleep now I am wide awake just wanting to call my boyfriend but I don't want to seem needy or pushy when he is recovering. Link to post Share on other sites
ExpatInItaly Posted July 18, 2020 Share Posted July 18, 2020 Just call him, OP. You're his girlfriend - you should be past feeling so worried about seeming needy, especially when he's come out of surgery. 1 Link to post Share on other sites
Author Sarah_K Posted July 18, 2020 Author Share Posted July 18, 2020 3 hours ago, ExpatInItaly said: Just call him, OP. You're his girlfriend - you should be past feeling so worried about seeming needy, especially when he's come out of surgery. I know, I've already spoke to him a few times already. He's told me to get some sleep as its nearly 3am here and I've not slept properly. Link to post Share on other sites
ExpatInItaly Posted July 18, 2020 Share Posted July 18, 2020 2 hours ago, Sarah_K said: I know, I've already spoke to him a few times already. He's told me to get some sleep as its nearly 3am here and I've not slept properly. What do you suppose has you more worried at this point - the surgery, or the fact that he discouraged you from coming to visit? I understand you want to be there for him and that surgery is not pleasant. But I wonder, would you be this distraught if you two hadn't just had this other bump in the road? 1 Link to post Share on other sites
Author Sarah_K Posted July 18, 2020 Author Share Posted July 18, 2020 2 hours ago, ExpatInItaly said: What do you suppose has you more worried at this point - the surgery, or the fact that he discouraged you from coming to visit? I understand you want to be there for him and that surgery is not pleasant. But I wonder, would you be this distraught if you two hadn't just had this other bump in the road? Yes, but in normal times I'd have took some time off and be on the next flight up to him. Its much harder I can't do that. Link to post Share on other sites
Fair Posted July 18, 2020 Share Posted July 18, 2020 Err... No. It's not selfish of you. It's normal. But don't go. He's trying to discourage you from coming. Link to post Share on other sites
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