Lost my best friend

[beauty0815]

(Sorry Not sure if this particular forum is the right place to post this) This past weekend , my best friend passed away. I knew she was in stage 4 and terminal, but I was still in denial about her chance of actually passing away. Now all I feel is this huge loss in my heart. It was a pretty traumatic experience holding her hand and watching her take her last breath.Everyday I think about her and wonder why this had to happen. i just keep looking at our pictures and going through our years of text messages. It’s so surreal , I can’t believe it . She was the only person besides my family that I talked to and hung out with. I almost don’t want to befriend anyone else plus at this point I don’t know how . Has anyone ever went through this type of loss before ? How did you cope ? Any encouraging words would be of help now thank you 

[Fox Sake]

On 7/30/2020 at 1:20 AM, beauty0815 said:

(Sorry Not sure if this particular forum is the right place to post this) This past weekend , my best friend passed away. I knew she was in stage 4 and terminal, but I was still in denial about her chance of actually passing away. Now all I feel is this huge loss in my heart. It was a pretty traumatic experience holding her hand and watching her take her last breath.Everyday I think about her and wonder why this had to happen. i just keep looking at our pictures and going through our years of text messages. It’s so surreal , I can’t believe it . She was the only person besides my family that I talked to and hung out with. I almost don’t want to befriend anyone else plus at this point I don’t know how . Has anyone ever went through this type of loss before ? How did you cope ? Any encouraging words would be of help now thank you 

How are you coping now? 
I wouldn’t say this is the wrong place to post. I just don’t think anyone knows what to say. I started replying to you when you posted it but I wasn’t in the right space and things were still raw for you. These emotions and feelings take the mind time to process. 
You’ll be okay. Be thankful for all the great times and the fact that you were there for her. This will all make you stronger. Live the life your friend would want you to live. If you find you’re down in the dumps then post here and people will try and help pick you up 

Edited August 9, 2020 by Fox Sake
Grammar

[FMW]

I'm very sorry for your loss.  Take the time to grieve, share your memories with others who loved her if you have the opportunity.   

Fox Sake is right, focus on all the wonderful years you had together.  Unfortunately loving someone will always result in pain, we lose our family members, and yes, our friends. But the experience of loving is what makes us human and gives meaning and richness to our lives.  The experience of loss is what gives us appreciation and understanding of what a gift we had. 

It was a blessing for you to be there with her when she took her last breath.  I was there for my father's last breath and I'm truly grateful, it was a way to honor him and mark the importance he had - and will always have - in my life.

The pain will lose its sharpness in time and you will be able to appreciate the memories and the gift of having her in your life for the time you had.  That will hopefully help you to stay open and receptive to new friendships in the future.

Not having loving friendships in the future might spare some pain, but life would be very cold and lonely.   

 

[beauty0815]

On 8/9/2020 at 7:12 PM, Fox Sake said:

How are you coping now? 
I wouldn’t say this is the wrong place to post. I just don’t think anyone knows what to say. I started replying to you when you posted it but I wasn’t in the right space and things were still raw for you. These emotions and feelings take the mind time to process. 
You’ll be okay. Be thankful for all the great times and the fact that you were there for her. This will all make you stronger. Live the life your friend would want you to live. If you find you’re down in the dumps then post here and people will try and help pick you up 

I am doing a little better. My family have been determined to not let me get too depressed. They check on me a lot and get me out of the house.  Getting out and staying active has definitely helped. “Be thankful for all the great times and the fact that you were there for her. This will all make you stronger.”  You are definitely right and I am doing just that. Thank you so much for responding and your encouraging words. 

[beauty0815]

On 8/9/2020 at 7:36 PM, FMW said:

I'm very sorry for your loss.  Take the time to grieve, share your memories with others who loved her if you have the opportunity.   

Fox Sake is right, focus on all the wonderful years you had together.  Unfortunately loving someone will always result in pain, we lose our family members, and yes, our friends. But the experience of loving is what makes us human and gives meaning and richness to our lives.  The experience of loss is what gives us appreciation and understanding of what a gift we had. 

It was a blessing for you to be there with her when she took her last breath.  I was there for my father's last breath and I'm truly grateful, it was a way to honor him and mark the importance he had - and will always have - in my life.

The pain will lose its sharpness in time and you will be able to appreciate the memories and the gift of having her in your life for the time you had.  That will hopefully help you to stay open and receptive to new friendships in the future.

Not having loving friendships in the future might spare some pain, but life would be very cold and lonely.   

 

Thank you. The pain has lessen its effects as the weeks go by. Currently, I have moments of sadness instead of it being the whole day. Work and simply doing anything helps me keep a level head. Thanks for being open enough to share the experience about the loss of your father ..I am sorry for your loss but I know the good memories of him bring you peace and happiness.  Thank you for your words of encouragement!