Mikado Posted July 30, 2020 Share Posted July 30, 2020 I know I'm risking sounding whing and ungrateful but for years I've felt that my parents don't give a s*** about me. It was alright when I was little. My mum was a good mum, she stayed at home so I was given lots of attention. My dad always worked long hours, so no real interaction there. When he did interact with me his approach was completely different from my mum's approach which was really confusing to me as a child. Looking back I can't rule out that my mum wasn't too nice and maybe didn't spoil me a bit but I don't think my dad's approach to this was well thought through or efficient. My mum was always calm and nice to me why my dad would tell at me and punish me without explaining to me why he thought my behaviour was wrong. So no educational effect there. In many cases he simply punished me for stuff that he accused me of doing. Like lying when I was telling the truth or eavesdropping when I was simply walking by the room he was having a phone conversation in. I found this really unfair. He always made me feel like no matter what I did it was wrong and that my opinions didn't matter. Whenever I tried to explain myself he said it was just lies and excuses. My parents broke up when I was eleven and my mum left me with my dad. She said she'd come to get me once she'd settled in but she never did. Then she got pregnant and had my sister and I was basically forgotten. What my dad told me is that my mum's a bitch and a whore who cheated on him and that she didn't want me. What my mum told me was that she'd gotten pregnant when I was nine and my dad wanted her to have an abortion which she didn't want but then she had a miscarriage and lost the baby anyway but she couldn't forgive my father for wanting her to get an abortion and that's why she had an affair and left my father. I don't condone my mother's actions but I kinda understand her while I think that my father's behaviour is completely f***ed up. I get hating your ex wife but you don't call her a whore in front of your kid and tell him your mum doesn't want you. I still live with my father but am trying to get away as soon as possible. I'm so f***ing tired of this crap. He constantly belittles and insults me and shows me day after day how much he didn't give a f*** about me. I know other people have it a lot worse and I wish I could just be ok with how things are but every day I feel like no one gives a damn and I'm not handling it well and I really don't feel ok anymore. Link to post Share on other sites
CautiouslyOptimistic Posted July 30, 2020 Share Posted July 30, 2020 1 hour ago, Mikado said: I know other people have it a lot worse.... Sure, they do. But this is pretty bad :(. I had it LOADS better! I'm so sorry :(. How old are you? I hope you're able to heal from the toxic way you were parented. 1 1 Link to post Share on other sites
Author Mikado Posted July 30, 2020 Author Share Posted July 30, 2020 Thank you for your sympathy. I realki appreciate it. I'm 18. Hoping to move out soon. 2 Link to post Share on other sites
Wiseman2 Posted July 30, 2020 Share Posted July 30, 2020 2 hours ago, Mikado said: I know I'm risking sounding whing and ungrateful but for years I've felt that my parents don't give a s*** about me. If you want dates and sex, you'll have to clean up your attitude and potty mouth. Even if you're an angry teen, it's better not to be this insecure and angry. Talk to your grandparents, aunts, uncles, teachers etc. Link to post Share on other sites
Author Mikado Posted July 30, 2020 Author Share Posted July 30, 2020 32 minutes ago, Wiseman2 said: If you want dates and sex, you'll have to clean up your attitude and potty mouth. Even if you're an angry teen, it's better not to be this insecure and angry. Talk to your grandparents, aunts, uncles, teachers etc. I'm not angry. Just sad. And I don't see anything wrong with swearing to express one's feelings. I don't have grandparents or other close relatives and I've finished school, so no teachers. And who talks to their teachers about private stuff anyway? Link to post Share on other sites
Ellener Posted July 31, 2020 Share Posted July 31, 2020 12 hours ago, Mikado said: I'm 18. You've got lots of time to get over your earlier life experiences. Just remember your parents did the best they could. They weren't good parents but one day you will be. One day plan that you are going to have a good relationship with your own wife and child. 1 Link to post Share on other sites
Noproblem Posted July 31, 2020 Share Posted July 31, 2020 (edited) My only advice for you is to please succeed in school, so you get a scholarship and go to a college some where or just go to any college, take loans, stay away, work afterward or during that time. Don't abandon education, try to succeed no matter what and run for it when the time is right. I am so sorry for what happened to you and I wish you were dealt a better card, but that's the situation and you better try to avoid your father as much as you can, it sucks that now is a pandemic and no open library are there or any safe places. Edited July 31, 2020 by Noproblem 1 Link to post Share on other sites
Noproblem Posted July 31, 2020 Share Posted July 31, 2020 (edited) On 7/30/2020 at 1:56 PM, Wiseman2 said: If you want dates and sex, you'll have to clean up your attitude and potty mouth. Even if you're an angry teen, it's better not to be this insecure and angry. Talk to your grandparents, aunts, uncles, teachers etc. are you trolling here, are you for real? What's wrong with you attacking this kid? Either be supportive or just go away, by any chance are you his freaking abusive father! Edited July 31, 2020 by Noproblem 3 Link to post Share on other sites
Author Mikado Posted August 8, 2020 Author Share Posted August 8, 2020 I'm tired. Apparently I'm whiny and everything is my problem anyway. People always say to talk to them when you feel bad but when you do they give you weird looks like what's your problem what are you even complaining about that's no real problem. You're just whiny and you could just change things instead of complaining. I'm tired cause apparently I'm the problem and I feel so f***ing alone and tired Link to post Share on other sites
Author Mikado Posted August 8, 2020 Author Share Posted August 8, 2020 You're only allowed to feel bad if you have a real problem Link to post Share on other sites
Noproblem Posted August 9, 2020 Share Posted August 9, 2020 On 8/8/2020 at 1:17 PM, Mikado said: I'm tired. Apparently I'm whiny and everything is my problem anyway. People always say to talk to them when you feel bad but when you do they give you weird looks like what's your problem what are you even complaining about that's no real problem. You're just whiny and you could just change things instead of complaining. I'm tired cause apparently I'm the problem and I feel so f***ing alone and tired You are not the problem! Sometimes we need to complain to feel better, so complain if you want but at the same time plan ahead on how to fix your problem. 1 Link to post Share on other sites
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