RG1234 Posted August 24, 2020 Share Posted August 24, 2020 Hi there. I have now been the OW on & off for about two years. We met at work and were good friends initially - he is much older than me and always spoke of his happy life with his wife and very young children. It was the last thing I ever expected to get involved in, overall I am a happy, smart person who used to judge people who were in these situations. Now 2 years on, I still find myself here, crying all the time and this relationship is taking over my life & happiness. I want to move on and finally be free of this but I seem to get sucked back in all the time. It is a constant hot / cold relationship which is terrible for my self esteem but for some reason I always respond. We have seen eachother quite a lot on & off and always very close when together. We didn't see eachother for months because of lockdown but almost spoke more however that has changed over last 2 weeks as he found his wife is expecting another child. He says he still wants to be close to me but also needs to stand up at home and help out more / be responsible. We are very close & know a lot about eachother but we always talk on his terms, his tone etc. He can go from loving me one week to barely texting the. next & I just cannot live like this anymore. We work together which causes more difficult dynamic, but I just want to forget him, move on & be happy. Link to post Share on other sites
Wiseman2 Posted August 24, 2020 Share Posted August 24, 2020 If he's your supervisor file a sexual harassment case. That will fix it very fast. Link to post Share on other sites
mark clemson Posted August 24, 2020 Share Posted August 24, 2020 I think once your brain is "hooked" on the situation, there is no easy way, really. Having the joy of love/NRE for another via an affair, but not experiencing the pain of loving someone you can't actually have is not realistic once you actually start to fall in love. Your brain chemistry changes in ways that cannot easily be "shut off" but have to be endured instead. Ending it is tough but that's probably what needs to happen. Consider reading a bunch of threads in this section for women who are in a similar situation, and seeing what advice seems applicable to you; I'm guessing a lot of it will be. Link to post Share on other sites
Amethyst68 Posted August 24, 2020 Share Posted August 24, 2020 1 hour ago, Wiseman2 said: If he's your supervisor file a sexual harassment case. That will fix it very fast. What harassment? The OP is a willing participant in an affair. Please don't cheapen the experiences of people who are actually harassed in the workplace. Link to post Share on other sites
BaileyB Posted August 24, 2020 Share Posted August 24, 2020 What would have to happen for you to finally decide to walk away... Link to post Share on other sites
Recommended Posts