QuietRiot Posted August 28, 2020 Share Posted August 28, 2020 I was wondering how often do single women wear wedding rings to scare off single men that approach them. Would you say this is an extreme measure as opposed to saying you have a boyfriend (even if you're lying) or that you're not interested? I am guessing this is only done with the more attractive women since they get approached a lot? Link to post Share on other sites
basil67 Posted August 28, 2020 Share Posted August 28, 2020 I've not heard of fake wedding rings being worn, but it doesn't surprise me. And no, it's not more extreme than lying about a boyfriend. Either way, it's a good way to make random men back off.. The topic of lying about boyfriends is sometimes discussed in feminist circles. Broadly speaking, if a woman says "no, I'm not interested" the guy responds with "awww...come on, give me a chance" (or some such line). But if she responds with something about having a boyfriend - or wears the ring from a man - the guys who's hitting on her will respect that she's the property of another man. Perhaps you could explain to me why men will keep trying when she says she's not interested, but back off if she mentions a man? 2 Link to post Share on other sites
Author QuietRiot Posted August 28, 2020 Author Share Posted August 28, 2020 3 minutes ago, basil67 said: I've not heard of fake wedding rings being worn, but it doesn't surprise me. And no, it's not more extreme than lying about a boyfriend. Either way, it's a good way to make random men back off.. The topic of lying about boyfriends is sometimes discussed in feminist circles. Broadly speaking, if a woman says "no, I'm not interested" the guy responds with "awww...come on, give me a chance" (or some such line). But if she responds with something about having a boyfriend - or wears the ring from a man - the guys who's hitting on her will respect that she's the property of another man. Perhaps you could explain to me why men will keep trying when she says she's not interested, but back off if she mentions a man? Hm, I think it's because there had been rather anecdotal cases where a man had asked out a woman more than once and she finally gave in and actually wound up in a long term relationship or even marrying him. There had been "how we met" stories that reflected this. Link to post Share on other sites
basil67 Posted August 28, 2020 Share Posted August 28, 2020 Well, I guess men can choose to not respect a "no". But they have zero to complain about when women who get mad about their "no" being disrespected choose to fake their way out of being approached. 2 Link to post Share on other sites
Tamfana Posted August 28, 2020 Share Posted August 28, 2020 4 hours ago, QuietRiot said: I was wondering how often do single women wear wedding rings to scare off single men that approach them. Would you say this is an extreme measure as opposed to saying you have a boyfriend (even if you're lying) or that you're not interested? I switched to wearing my old engagement ring since wedding rings aren't a good deterrent. Some guys assume everyone cheats on their spouse. LOL 1 1 Link to post Share on other sites
FMW Posted August 28, 2020 Share Posted August 28, 2020 It seems unnecessary to wear a fake ring unless a woman is just scared of attention. Most women over the age of 21 have the experience and skill to deflect unwanted attention, even persistent attention. And unless she's alone, a friend or another guy will probably help back up that deflection. An unwelcoming look and physically turning away from a guy is probably going to work better than a fake ring. Link to post Share on other sites
elaine567 Posted August 28, 2020 Share Posted August 28, 2020 3 minutes ago, FMW said: An unwelcoming look and physically turning away from a guy is probably going to work better than a fake ring. Agreed it has always worked for me. I think some women do invite attention and get snarled up when some guy will not take no for an answer as she seemed so receptive initially. I think some guys are very pushy and disrespectful and ignore the discomfort they cause to women. I have never lived in a country/area where men frequently and persistently sexually harass women, so maybe my experience is not the "norm" for every one. Link to post Share on other sites
Wiseman2 Posted August 28, 2020 Share Posted August 28, 2020 💍 It depends on if it's a confusion of wildebeest🐂, a conspiracy of lemurs🐒, a skulk of foxes🦊, a bloat of hippos🦛 or a gaggle of geese🦢 Link to post Share on other sites
FMW Posted August 28, 2020 Share Posted August 28, 2020 (edited) I've only had one real issue in recent years. A few years ago I was at a bar listening to a band. I was with a friend, but she was dancing or otherwise occupied somewhere else. A guy kept talking to me and I was ignoring him, but eventually he put his hands around my waist to get my attention. I put my hand in the middle of his chest and gave him a solid push, enough to make him back up and it got the attention of a few guys close by. Those guys, who I didn't know, actually stood up and stepped forward and just stared at the guy until he walked away. Problem solved. I doubt that guy even glanced at my hand to see if I was wearing a ring. Edited August 28, 2020 by FMW Link to post Share on other sites
Tamfana Posted August 28, 2020 Share Posted August 28, 2020 3 hours ago, FMW said: It seems unnecessary to wear a fake ring unless a woman is just scared of attention. More annoyed than scared. They're usually pretty so it's also just jewelry. Link to post Share on other sites
mark clemson Posted August 28, 2020 Share Posted August 28, 2020 "It let's me focus on my friends when I'm out with them (men won't bother me)" "People at work assume I'm married and won't pry" "I'm trying to give my someone dense partner a hint" "I feel like it makes me seem more professional" "I'm a bit weird and use it as a conversation started by admitting it's fake and then discussing it, making me more memorable than others" "I don't want to deal with telling people the wedding got cancelled" "It helps my male co-workers to be less interested in me" Number one answer: "It keeps away the creeps" Link to post Share on other sites
basil67 Posted August 28, 2020 Share Posted August 28, 2020 5 hours ago, FMW said: It seems unnecessary to wear a fake ring unless a woman is just scared of attention. Most women over the age of 21 have the experience and skill to deflect unwanted attention, even persistent attention. And unless she's alone, a friend or another guy will probably help back up that deflection. An unwelcoming look and physically turning away from a guy is probably going to work better than a fake ring. I'm no "scared" of attention when on a night out with a friend. Rather, I don't want to be bothered by men in the first place. 1 Link to post Share on other sites
alphamale Posted August 28, 2020 Share Posted August 28, 2020 one exeptionally pretty gal that i dated for 3 or 4 months used to do this. she said it was "just easier" this way. but a lot of decent guys i have known will see a wedding ring and run the other way Link to post Share on other sites
Zona Posted August 29, 2020 Share Posted August 29, 2020 Of course, If it's a really hot guy that wants to get their attention, then it's not a problem. Ring would disappear fast. Link to post Share on other sites
basil67 Posted August 29, 2020 Share Posted August 29, 2020 @Zona - groan. Really hot guys are frequently not worth the time of day. 1 Link to post Share on other sites
basil67 Posted August 29, 2020 Share Posted August 29, 2020 13 hours ago, FMW said: It seems unnecessary to wear a fake ring unless a woman is just scared of attention. I should add - of course it's unnecessary. It's simply choice. Link to post Share on other sites
healing light Posted August 29, 2020 Share Posted August 29, 2020 I wore a fake wedding ring when I had to regularly take public transit at night in a big city. I started it after a random guy smiled at me and deliberately pulled out my ear buds to get my attention, that was just the last straw at the time, haha. Saying you have a boyfriend isn't enough to deter some men. I don't do it anymore since I have access to my own vehicle now. 1 Link to post Share on other sites
CaliforniaGirl Posted August 29, 2020 Share Posted August 29, 2020 I'm not sure. I personally don't know anyone who does this. Link to post Share on other sites
CaliforniaGirl Posted August 29, 2020 Share Posted August 29, 2020 14 hours ago, FMW said: It seems unnecessary to wear a fake ring unless a woman is just scared of attention. Most women over the age of 21 have the experience and skill to deflect unwanted attention, even persistent attention. And unless she's alone, a friend or another guy will probably help back up that deflection. An unwelcoming look and physically turning away from a guy is probably going to work better than a fake ring. We do and we don't...every guy is different, every situation is different, and many times, men are just physically bigger than women. Not every woman is assertive, especially at only 21. With that said, I'm tiny but I think I get scary when I'm really really really mad. I haven't been worried but you still have to be sensible. Most men are good people as the random guy who's refusing to say no and is muscling up isn't going to be dissuaded by a wedding ring so...I just can't see it as a defense or safety mechanism. Link to post Share on other sites
NuevoYorko Posted August 29, 2020 Share Posted August 29, 2020 21 hours ago, QuietRiot said: I was wondering how often do single women wear wedding rings to scare off single men that approach them. Would you say this is an extreme measure as opposed to saying you have a boyfriend (even if you're lying) or that you're not interested? I am guessing this is only done with the more attractive women since they get approached a lot? I don't know any women who've done this, but it seems obvious that they simply don't want to be approached. If it works, it's not extreme. It's easier to put on a ring than it is to speak to people they don't want to talk to at all. 3 1 Link to post Share on other sites
ExpatInItaly Posted August 29, 2020 Share Posted August 29, 2020 4 hours ago, CaliforniaGirl said: I personally don't know anyone who does this. Neither do I. I don't think it's that common, OP. 1 Link to post Share on other sites
FMW Posted August 29, 2020 Share Posted August 29, 2020 Really funny timing - my 73 year old mother was telling me on the phone yesterday that a guy at a store (that she didn't know) told her she was attractive. She was offended and brought up the fact to me that she always wears her wedding ring (my dad died 4 years ago). Link to post Share on other sites
Author QuietRiot Posted August 29, 2020 Author Share Posted August 29, 2020 (edited) Really? I figured women that age would embrace compliments on their appearance. lol Funny Most women I know, past 50, wish they'd get compliments on their appearance. Edited August 29, 2020 by QuietRiot Link to post Share on other sites
FMW Posted August 29, 2020 Share Posted August 29, 2020 She's always been very attractive, and still is, just obviously not a young woman anymore (especially since I'm not either!). I think she's like a lot of women, of all ages, that feel a little on edge having interest being so openly shown. It doesn't faze me to just ignore and walk away, but she doesn't have the mindset to pull that off. Link to post Share on other sites
jspice Posted August 30, 2020 Share Posted August 30, 2020 10 hours ago, QuietRiot said: Really? I figured women that age would embrace compliments on their appearance. lol Funny Most women I know, past 50, wish they'd get compliments on their appearance. Most women regardless of age aren’t dying to be complimented on their looks by random men as they go about their business. Where do you get these ideas? 2 Link to post Share on other sites
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