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Citing age as a reason for settling 'I'm not getting any younger!


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9 hours ago, QuietRiot said:

Yeah, I had often wondered women who had put me in the friend zone will later finally decide to say "Screw it, I'll marry that guy that was trying to turn me around about him!" lol 

I wouldn't say I friendzoned him.  We stayed crazy for each other, but I just couldn't do marriage with no female contact.  Having other wives in the picture fixed it enough that I could settle down and not be a cheater.

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1 hour ago, QuietRiot said:

I don't know what your obsession with hair transplants are about. lol.

I'm bisexual.  I am not attracted to a man who is bald. 

Unless he's called Vin Diesel or Jason Statham, and that's because they have tremendously beautiful bodies.  Never met that many women who thought the bald look looked good, not young women at least, my mom is in her 60s and she thinks 70+ year old Bruce Willis is super hot, but look at his cheekbones.

 

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But...a lot of women are cool with bald guys. Also, you don't have to built like Brad Pitt or whomever to snag the ladies....of course, you'd more than likely snag ladies that hot and in shape if men did what you recommended, but if I can snag a chunky gal, I'm good with that if I do some exercising and proper diet.

Yes, yes, there are women who like all sorts of dudes, that's for sure. Yes, there are plenty of men who like thicc women. 

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Hell, I get shocked when I see guys with beer bellies dating a lady marathon runner. (Seen this lady at my gym, saw this dude with her on FB, said it was her honey, dude looked like he had a mullet hair cut and an egg on legs) lol

Eh, you never know what's going through people's heads. I've had women reject my friends who work for Giorgio Armani as catwalk models, for me, and I'm pretty much average-looking, so it coul be a case of these women not wanting to deal with a guy who might have a huge ego,  or they might have had bad experiences with a guy that attractive and as such they decide to date a guy who isn't as attractive as they themselves are, and they can be happy with these guys, I guess.

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I know I don't act as such, I aim at my level of women.

Same. Never really saw the point of going for 10s, although the one time I went for a 10, things were alright for a bit but then I got dumped and that kinda stung not gonna lie, so now I chill and don't really care that much, and honestly, considering I've been in self-imposed quarentine since January or something ,I'd even sleep with a 90 year old nun.

This experience I'm going through makes me respect all of the catholic priests who willingly stay celibate for the entirety of their lives. 

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  • 3 weeks later...
Betty-N-Jeremy

I am a very classy woman who has been a corporate executive and was very picky on who I would go out with, which resulted in very few quality dates.  I never adjusted my expectations and when I was 69, I got to know my 30 year old neighbor who was helping bring in my groceries and was truly a gentleman in everway. Well over 6 months,  our friendship evolved to the point where I invited him to move in with me. Before this, my parameters were no younger than 5 years. If it wasn't for him and his interest in being with an older woman,  i would still be single. We married a number of moths after that and it's been almost 2 years now. Yes I am in a married to a man almost 40 years younger, but my life is so much more fulfilling I foolishly had too many barriers that would have kept me single and unhappy. Thank goodness for Jeremy, for not giving up, we are still very much in love, we are not afraid to hold hands and kiss in public, though many do look surprised, especially when we went on a cruise together before COVID hit. I know realize it was a huge mistake putting all these barriers and yes, my daughter and friends were shocked when first heard, but no more. I am very happy, happier than my first marriage when I was much younger. Keeping your options open will bring you more happiness. 

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9 hours ago, Betty-N-Jeremy said:

I am a very classy woman who has been a corporate executive and was very picky on who I would go out with, which resulted in very few quality dates.  I never adjusted my expectations and when I was 69, I got to know my 30 year old neighbor who was helping bring in my groceries and was truly a gentleman in everway. Well over 6 months,  our friendship evolved to the point where I invited him to move in with me. Before this, my parameters were no younger than 5 years. If it wasn't for him and his interest in being with an older woman,  i would still be single. We married a number of moths after that and it's been almost 2 years now. Yes I am in a married to a man almost 40 years younger, but my life is so much more fulfilling I foolishly had too many barriers that would have kept me single and unhappy. Thank goodness for Jeremy, for not giving up, we are still very much in love, we are not afraid to hold hands and kiss in public, though many do look surprised, especially when we went on a cruise together before COVID hit. I know realize it was a huge mistake putting all these barriers and yes, my daughter and friends were shocked when first heard, but no more. I am very happy, happier than my first marriage when I was much younger. Keeping your options open will bring you more happiness. 

I have to say, that is quite a story. I used to be one of those people that would wonder about "mismatched" couples....but someone told me that emotions, feelings, love, etc., cannot be explained logically. 

As a mid-40s man, even I'm considering  younger women as an option, as opposed to women around my age (not entirely excluding that age bracket though), just finding women closer to my age to have more baggage than I'd care to handle...some of these ladies are to the point of not having an interest in even a relationship....usually due to a previous marriage they've been jaded by or just burned too many times to even consider having a boyfriend in their lives.

But kudos for you that you wound up being l flexible! And welcome to the board :)

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8 hours ago, QuietRiot said:

I have to say, that is quite a story. I used to be one of those people that would wonder about "mismatched" couples....but someone told me that emotions, feelings, love, etc., cannot be explained logically. 

That depends on what kind of couples we are looking at.

Couples of the same age are usually with each other because they have hobbies they share in common, they are physically and emotionally attracted to each other, they've gone through the same experiences being of the same age, growing up in the same generation, and they usually share the same goal for a life together.

Is the man 10-15 years older than her?

More often than not, with the global economy collapsing every few years, and with women wanting to leave their parents home, what many of the women who don't resort to a life as a sex worker(strip-teaser, ''camgirl'' pornstar etc) is to date a man who is much older, who can afford them.

When women say they prefer older men? That means they want to have children while they're in their early 20s down to their mid 20s, but the young men they meet are either not interested in becoming a father that early in life(a man should become a father for the first time at the age of 50, if he's interested in having children) or they can't afford a wife, a house, a car, the monthly utility bills + food + health insurance etc.

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As a mid-40s man, even I'm considering  younger women as an option, as opposed to women around my age (not entirely excluding that age bracket though), just finding women closer to my age to have more baggage than I'd care to handle...some of these ladies are to the point of not having an interest in even a relationship....usually due to a previous marriage they've been jaded by or just burned too many times to even consider having a boyfriend in their lives.

But kudos for you that you wound up being l flexible! And welcome to the board :)

Depends.  Every man aged 18-100 considers young/younger women. As a dream, for most, as a possibility for many, as a possibility for some, and as an option for a very few.

These relationships are usually economically-oriented, and done out of necessity. A man in his 30s who is good-looking, fit, and looked young when he was in his early 20s(think Baby-faced Leonardo Dicaprio) and aged well, because he didn't smoke, didn't drink, ate healthy and avoided all fast food, and he was lucky to not lose his hair(bald spots; thinnning hair; widow's peak, receding hairline etc) in that case he can pull it off.

He can manage to sleep/date/marry physically attractive women who are 10 years younger than him if he's 30 years old, and women who are 15 years younger than him if he's 35 years old. But for most middle-aged men and old men who are interested in dating young, physically attractive women  what they gotta do is spend a lot of money. Which is not bad for the economy, it's actually rather good.  Young women need to pay for their college tuition, rent, living costs, textbooks, clothes, access to doctors etc, so I have no beef against sugar daddy relationships, which is what most relationships where the women is young(younger than him by 10 years) and the guy's old.

A guy who doesn't delude himself thinking his young sugar baby is attracted to him, and doesn't develop emotional attachements to her can have a lot of fun with the state of the economy.

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7 minutes ago, Azincourt said:

More often than not, with the global economy collapsing every few years, and with women wanting to leave their parents home, what many of the women who don't resort to a life as a sex worker(strip-teaser, ''camgirl'' pornstar etc) is to date a man who is much older, who can afford them.

When women say they prefer older men? That means they want to have children while they're in their early 20s down to their mid 20s, but the young men they meet are either not interested in becoming a father that early in life(a man should become a father for the first time at the age of 50, if he's interested in having children) or they can't afford a wife, a house, a car, the monthly utility bills + food + health insurance etc.

If a young woman wants to leave her parents home and be free why would she then want an older man (another parent).  Most young women want to leave home so they can be free to do what they want which is usually having sex with hot young men like themselves.  Money can't buy everything.  Also it's rare to find women who are ready to be a mother in their early 20s unless it happens by accident and even then they want a man within a 3 year age difference either way.  There's a gorgeous 23 year old woman at my church who has 2 kids by a 20 year old guy that she won't give up for anything.

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If a young woman wants to leave her parents home and be free why would she then want an older man (another parent).  Most young women want to leave home so they can be free to do what they want which is usually having sex with hot young men like themselves.  Money can't buy everything.  Also it's rare to find women who are ready to be a mother in their early 20s unless it happens by accident and even then they want a man within a 3 year age difference either way.  There's a gorgeous 23 year old woman at my church who has 2 kids by a 20 year old guy that she won't give up for anything.

As I was staying up all night to watch the debates, I happened to come across a map with the names of the European nations and the age most of the people from that particular nation would leave their parents home.

Sweden, Germany, Norway, Denmark, and other Countries from the same mold? The average age to leave their parents home for good was 19.

Italy, Spain, Portugal?  Age 30.

Now that got me thinking. Why would a guy want to spend the best years of his life(18-25) living with his parents, when he should be out there enjoying his youth and having fun, and having to take home a woman and sleeping with her quickly and then the sex will be awful because he shares the house with mom, dad, grandpa, dog, the occasional neighbor who comes by to ask for sugar?

It's because he can't afford it. It's expensive to attend college, it's expensive to live away from home when you want to study a degree that is only offered in the big cities, and every thing related to being alive costs money, and every year more and more so.

On the other hand, the Scandinavians and the nords not only get free college, but they're paid by their govt.s almost 1000 euros a month(and getting paid by the govt. to go to school stars before high school) to attend college, and they're given a free apartment to live in while they study, and after they graduate, they're given the option to buy a house for cheap, especially if they want to move to areas of the nation that are less populated, with the govt. wanting to incentivate people to leave the big cities for the smaller ones.

Since most women aren't lucky enough to have a billionaire as a dad, what that means is that young women(18-25) are going to be looking for a guy their own age who has already left his parents place, has a job, money set aside, and can afford to help her pay for rent. But the problem here is that if you check up the data, the majority of the young men who are living in the poorest Countries in Europe(those Countries who aren't France, Germany and Italy) either can't afford to move out, because they can't find a job, or they do find a job but it brings in so little money it's a better option to stay home with their parents.

Which results in pairings with the woman being 20 and hot, and the dude being 30 and overweight, or the woman being 30 years old, and the guy looking worse than a 6000 year old Egyptian Pharaoh.

And honestly, even in Italy and France, everything is so incredibly expensive that you have lots and lots of 50 year old college graduates still living at home with mom and dad.  Which makes these folks develop the mentality of, their parents are old anyway, better stick around and wait for mom and dad to die of natural causes so they can inherit the house.

oh, there's lots of women in their early 20s who want to become a mother. I met quite a few. True, I was pretending to be as broke as the next guy(the mortggage on my house was paid off before the age of 25, and it's in an expensive city) and I also pretended to be living with roomates instead of having my own castle all for myself, so they didn't get any funny ideas, but these young women had no trouble saying they want to become a mother, and how they wanted to become a mother while they are still young and healthy.

True, money can't buy everything, but money can keep a young woman from having to resort to sex work like so many young women are taking part of these days, and not every beautiful woman can find herself a rich 19 year old attractive soccer player, like the young girlfriend of João Félix managed to find herself a golden goose.  Many, many, many young women have to settle for what they can get these days.

There's an absolutely gorgeous 24 year old 6 feet tall blonde, green eyed woman here whom I've seriously crushed after for the last 5 years, and although she checks me out often, all of the guy's she dates are overweight/much older/short as a leppechun because they make a LOT of money, and they're willing to spend it on her, I'm talking about men who make millions a year after taxes, and frankly, I can't afford her.

If I was a multi-millionaire I'd probably be married to her by no and be making some beautiful babies.

Anyway, what this bible-sized post is meaning to say, in way too many words, is that there's millions and millions of young women who are dating and marrying guys they really aren't into, but to them it's better than living with mom and pops until the age of 50 or whatever.

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6 hours ago, Azincourt said:

That depends on what kind of couples we are looking at.

Couples of the same age are usually with each other because they have hobbies they share in common, they are physically and emotionally attracted to each other, they've gone through the same experiences being of the same age, growing up in the same generation, and they usually share the same goal for a life together.

Is the man 10-15 years older than her?

More often than not, with the global economy collapsing every few years, and with women wanting to leave their parents home, what many of the women who don't resort to a life as a sex worker(strip-teaser, ''camgirl'' pornstar etc) is to date a man who is much older, who can afford them.

When women say they prefer older men? That means they want to have children while they're in their early 20s down to their mid 20s, but the young men they meet are either not interested in becoming a father that early in life(a man should become a father for the first time at the age of 50, if he's interested in having children) or they can't afford a wife, a house, a car, the monthly utility bills + food + health insurance etc.

Depends.  Every man aged 18-100 considers young/younger women. As a dream, for most, as a possibility for many, as a possibility for some, and as an option for a very few.

These relationships are usually economically-oriented, and done out of necessity. A man in his 30s who is good-looking, fit, and looked young when he was in his early 20s(think Baby-faced Leonardo Dicaprio) and aged well, because he didn't smoke, didn't drink, ate healthy and avoided all fast food, and he was lucky to not lose his hair(bald spots; thinnning hair; widow's peak, receding hairline etc) in that case he can pull it off.

He can manage to sleep/date/marry physically attractive women who are 10 years younger than him if he's 30 years old, and women who are 15 years younger than him if he's 35 years old. But for most middle-aged men and old men who are interested in dating young, physically attractive women  what they gotta do is spend a lot of money. Which is not bad for the economy, it's actually rather good.  Young women need to pay for their college tuition, rent, living costs, textbooks, clothes, access to doctors etc, so I have no beef against sugar daddy relationships, which is what most relationships where the women is young(younger than him by 10 years) and the guy's old.

A guy who doesn't delude himself thinking his young sugar baby is attracted to him, and doesn't develop emotional attachements to her can have a lot of fun with the state of the economy.

You know what's weird is...I had a woman like this interested in me, for some reason, she was fascinated on how much of a gentleman I am. And I wasn't even trying. I just met her at a couple of game night and beach Meetup group events.

But she was only comparing me to the dolts that she'd encountered when dating. I think it may be regional, as she's new to my area (from up north). She asked how old I was, and I told her my age. I was guessing her to be in her mid to late 20s. When I asked her her age...she said, "I'm old enough"

At that point, I lost interest as she was purposely holding that kind if info from me (double standard) and there had been a couple of other statements that were rather off-color that didn't jive with me. 

She was also secretive about why she moved here. As if she was kind of a gypsy of sorts. Said she didn't get a long with her parents and family back up north, but kept that close to the vest. Just a bad vibe I got from her.

I got a friend of mine, a photographer, mid 50s, dude is fat, nose hairs growing out of his nose a mile long, and bad breath. Nice guy though, mid-50s, and has a mid-30s HOT arse wife. She's a belly dancer/model. Met him as a, well, a photographer obviously. (Great way to meet the ladies, lol)

And no, he has no lucrative job. Was able to snag her soley on his personality. 

He couldn't believe he was able to snag a woman like her...handsome men always approach her, and he watches in his baseball cap, frumpy jeans and polo shirt, snickering. 

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On 10/1/2020 at 2:23 AM, QuietRiot said:

You know what's weird is...I had a woman like this interested in me, for some reason, she was fascinated on how much of a gentleman I am. And I wasn't even trying. I just met her at a couple of game night and beach Meetup group events.

But she was only comparing me to the dolts that she'd encountered when dating. I think it may be regional, as she's new to my area (from up north). She asked how old I was, and I told her my age. I was guessing her to be in her mid to late 20s. When I asked her her age...she said, "I'm old enough"

At that point, I lost interest as she was purposely holding that kind if info from me (double standard) and there had been a couple of other statements that were rather off-color that didn't jive with me. 

She was also secretive about why she moved here. As if she was kind of a gypsy of sorts. Said she didn't get a long with her parents and family back up north, but kept that close to the vest. Just a bad vibe I got from her.

I got a friend of mine, a photographer, mid 50s, dude is fat, nose hairs growing out of his nose a mile long, and bad breath. Nice guy though, mid-50s, and has a mid-30s HOT arse wife. She's a belly dancer/model. Met him as a, well, a photographer obviously. (Great way to meet the ladies, lol)

And no, he has no lucrative job. Was able to snag her soley on his personality. 

He couldn't believe he was able to snag a woman like her...handsome men always approach her, and he watches in his baseball cap, frumpy jeans and polo shirt, snickering. 

Well that goes both way too, its easy to impress someone who has never had a certain experience, its much much harder to impress someone who has had many experiences. I am very difficult to impress because of the people I have met. Of course one should be open minded enough to take each person on their own merits but we all know that does not happen.

Its good to know that people can snag people based on personality alone but I think that is rare. Of course its easy to be become jaded about this and believe that personality counts but does it really to MOST people. 

I think that beyond a certain point some people just stop caring and settle for anyone who sort of finds them attractive. Me, I'd rather chase someone who I like who does not like me than settle for that scenario but I realise the huge price I am going to ultimately pay for that decision. 

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15 minutes ago, ZA Dater said:

....

Its good to know that people can snag people based on personality alone but I think that is rare. Of course its easy to be become jaded about this and believe that personality counts but does it really to MOST people. 

...

I'd say the personality counts more than anything, both good and bad ones...especially "bad" or mismatched ones...for most people.  Alas most people have a poor conception of the personality they convey to others and if confused usually think it is much better and more appealing than it is...that is assuming they are not confusing things and activities with their personality, which is a whole other area of mistake.

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16 minutes ago, SumGuy said:

I'd say the personality counts more than anything, both good and bad ones...especially "bad" or mismatched ones...for most people.  Alas most people have a poor conception of the personality they convey to others and if confused usually think it is much better and more appealing than it is...that is assuming they are not confusing things and activities with their personality, which is a whole other area of mistake.

I agree with you. Personality counts for everything, and physical appearance and financial stability - while necessary AND important to the health of a relationship - are concurrent. But, if your personality is offensive, why would you think your wealth or physical appearance is enough to make up for it. Eventually, you'll be called out for having a sh*tty personality by your relationship partner and they will expect you to either change that sh*tty behavior, or they will break up with you. 

I know a lot of couples who are physically mismatched but who are extremely happy together. That's proof enough for me, that you fall in love with the person's personality and character first (if you are genuinely looking for real love, and not some sugar daddy/mommy situation). 

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