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Married and living with a roommate


sueme

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Hi. I just got married, I am 24 years old and I came to live here in the US with my husband. I am young and thought that living with a roommate would be easy and not much of a problem but apparently it is. 

My husband likes things organized, but lets this roommate do whatever he wants. The guy is a mess, and a spoiled rotten guy in his thirties. 

I just don't know. it is horrible that my husband and I have to buy all the cleaning products and the roomie never buys a thing, but for his personal use. And what really bugs me is that my husband doesn't has the guts to confront him. This guy never cleans, never takes out the garbage, never puts away the clean dishes, leaves his shoes everywhere. Ohhhh, but the worst part is his effing girlfriend!!! she is an Agnorant (Menaning: people who are extremely ignorant, yet are simultaneously extremely arrogant. Ex: people who think they know more about science that scientist). She is from a little town, very little education, she never cleans, is dirty, a mess. When she cleans, she does it wrong. and the cherry topping is that she talks so much, literally never shuts her mouth! it is a nightmare.  

But what I hate the most is that my husband never does anything about it and I look like the ogre here because I want a clean apartment. 

I know I'm just complaining, but we are in quarantine, and I am driving crazy with these people, the incompetence of my husband and me that I cant even work right now because I just moved from Guatemala, so I am waiting for my social security card. I have ZERO friends and no one to vent all of this with. 

 

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Why do you keep saying that your husband doesn't have the guts to confront them..... why don't you confront them?  You and your husband are both their roommates.  Do you view it as your husband's role to speak for the both of you?

Edited by ShyViolet
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Since the roommate was there before you were & he has a lease with your husband which pre-dates your marriage I would get your husband to deal with this guy. 

You need to speak with your husband about the "house rules" and the habits of this guy & his GF.  Once you & your husband agree about the new normal, your husband needs to explain this to the roommate.   Be direct with your husband about the problems & what you see as any solutions. 

As for the GF, you can't very well tell her to stop talking.  If you don't like the way she cleans take a softer approach & maybe teach her.  

Edited by d0nnivain
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