I feel like just giving up on myself.

[xoxobby_25]

Is there honestly something wrong with me? Every guy I approach ghosts me. Every. Single. One. I am almost 20 years old (female) and I can't get into a relationship. I am still a virgin because I am waiting to have a relationship. 

All I want is to physically meet someone. But no one asks to go on a date, and COVID is no excuse, these guys go out with their friends anyway. I've literally had enough. I dealt with all this s***  with this one guy (previous posts). Alot of people already hate me because of this situation. I feel pressured to move on because of this situation. 

I am not beautiful, but I am definitely not ugly. I stopped looking after myself, there's no point. I don't even want to get out of bed. I couldn't even go to uni yesterday because I felt so disgusting. Life doesn't feel worth living anymore. All my friends are in relationships and act like it's so easy. My therapist thinks I am not trying hard enough to talk to people. I've reached out to so many guys (most guys in person don't want to talk either) and they all ignore me. I can't date someone unless I'm physically attracted to them, attraction is really important for me. So the guys that do message me i'm not attracted to in the slightest.

I have dating anxiety. I truly think the last tinder fling, he was the most attractive guy in the world, and the only one who wasn't conceited. I feel anxious I'll never find a guy like him again. And I feel anxious if they are not as good as him.

I hate weekends because I know everyone is having sex and going on cute sunday beach dates while I'm alone or working. I hate looking at my virginless body and I know no guys would want to date me if they find this out. I don't even feel like me anymore. I feel like ending it all.   

[basil67]

Sorry to say xoxobby_25, but you're twisting the story to make this all sound worse than it is.   You say that guys don't want to talk to you or ignore you...and not guys ask you on dates.  Then you go on to talk about the guys who do message you who you aren't attracted to.   Therefore, your assertion that guys won't talk to you or ignore you is clearly false.

Have you discussed your disconnect with reality with your therapist?   

 

[Datingdisabled]

There are a couple posters who I would love to see how they would socialize in a room with someone like me at the table. Someone without a university degree and no desire to go and get one! 

The answer is right in your post. This guy was the most attractive man to you, your words, and you will never find someone better, again, your words. 

The issue you have is that you are still obsessed with this person even though he himself has rejected you and found another girlfriend. My advice is as follows. 

Be careful who you seek advice from online. In my experience, some people are going to be quick to respond to your posts and give you advice when they don't even attempt to understand yet that the world doesn't revolve around them or their degrees. They don't know you in RL so let that advice go in one ear and out the other and look for genuine people who genuinely know and understand. 

I can already tell you that this guy and this women and these peoples friends, as kind as some of them were, are not the end all and be all. Rather then think about dating or sex right now, you need to dig deep. You need to now find yourself and your place outside and after this incident. You need to be able to accept that people are going to judge you or forget about you. No one worth holding onto is ever going to sit there and find pleasure out of hurting someone else. I would never find pleasure in someone else's agony. I would never laugh, or judge. I would reach out and try to help them. I know more people who would do the same. 

When I first got here, I was a write off and people judged me. These days they come around and try to talk to me but I don't have the time of day. I've had a few give me gifts that are still in the bags. I'm kind, sure, but they aren't coming into my life because I no longer have a desire for them to be here. 

You will find that strength. You need to sit and think really hard about what in this life would motivate you and inspire you without a man in it. 

I painted and fixed my house and applied for a dog. For those of you who want to judge my ability to care for an animal, I have a cat and am the best dog owner as I adore animals and would want to care for one.

[chillii]

You also tell how your no stunner yet you insist on scoring a stunner yourself and say it can't be any other way. But don't forget , that goes both ways and they'll be wanting a stunner too. But then say most of them are conceited yet your not doing too bad in that department yourself either in that case.  Just pointing a few things out here that will just go on biting you back because what goes around comes around.

Edited September 11, 2020 by chillii

[Datingdisabled]

3 hours ago, chillii said:

You also tell how your no stunner yet you insist on scoring a stunner yourself and say it can't be any other way. But don't forget , that goes both ways and they'll be wanting a stunner too. But then say most of them are conceited yet your not doing too bad in that department yourself either in that case.  Just pointing a few things out here that will just go on biting you back because what goes around comes around.

She doesn't say that and I personally don't agree in dating someone you aren't physically attracted to nor would I expect someone to date me if they weren't physically attracted to. She felt a connection to a man who she found to be gorgeous and felt like he liked her back. He didn't and she had to get over that drop. When a feeling is mutual like that then it is exciting and when they drop you like that, it's disappointing. She had every right to find that again and it's almost like you are advising her to settle. She doesn't sound conceited and you can't tell if someone is on this forum. You sound like you are trying to kick an ego that isn't there. You also can't kick an ego on a forum like this. The power bar solves it. 

Edited September 11, 2020 by Datingdisabled

[stillafool]

Yes there are good looking people who will date below their looks but most will seek the best they can get because of what they have to offer.  OP you don't have to settle but you can't be angry at people because they, like you, want someone they are highly attracted to.  It is what it is and isn't anyone's fault.

[SincereOnlineGuy]

7 hours ago, xoxobby_25 said:

Is there honestly something wrong with me? Every guy I approach ghosts me. Every. Single. One. I am almost 20 years old (female) and I can't get into a relationship. I am still a virgin because I am waiting to have a relationship. 

All I want is to physically meet someone. But no one asks to go on a date, and COVID is no excuse, these guys go out with their friends anyway. I've literally had enough. I dealt with all this s***  with this one guy (previous posts). Alot of people already hate me because of this situation. I feel pressured to move on because of this situation. 

I am not beautiful, but I am definitely not ugly. I stopped looking after myself, there's no point. I don't even want to get out of bed. I couldn't even go to uni yesterday because I felt so disgusting. Life doesn't feel worth living anymore. All my friends are in relationships and act like it's so easy. My therapist thinks I am not trying hard enough to talk to people. I've reached out to so many guys (most guys in person don't want to talk either) and they all ignore me. I can't date someone unless I'm physically attracted to them, attraction is really important for me. So the guys that do message me i'm not attracted to in the slightest.

I have dating anxiety. I truly think the last tinder fling, he was the most attractive guy in the world, and the only one who wasn't conceited. I feel anxious I'll never find a guy like him again. And I feel anxious if they are not as good as him.

I hate weekends because I know everyone is having sex and going on cute sunday beach dates while I'm alone or working. I hate looking at my virginless body and I know no guys would want to date me if they find this out. I don't even feel like me anymore. I feel like ending it all.   

 

You are sooooooooooooooooooooooo up-in-your-head   on this subject (and it's not helping your life at all).

 

You're probably a million ways of NORmal...   (even if it is temporarily:  pandemic NORmal )

 

Somebody with 'dating anxiety' who (seems to need IN-person interaction to warm to the idea of dating someone)... definitely needs to put herself in places where LOTS of people ARE.

 

(that is next to impossible during Covid (while maintaining sensibility in terms of long-term health)...   so your goal at this point should be to NOT do yourself any worse esteem-wise while you wait this thing out)

 

Spend some of this Covid time listing the ways you intend to alter your life once we can live again without immediate covid concerns...

Plant yourself at a Starbucks...   every Sunday... for two hours...  reading the newspaper...  or working/surfing on your laptop...

The goal is to make yourself part of the woodwork there.    You want to BE the norm...

Become familiar TO (not just with ) the surroundings...           and in a short while you will begin to make little connections THAT way...

 

it seems like NOTHING, right here,  as we're manufacturing your plan on LS...     but stop assessing (every male who happens along) first with (could he potentially get my virginity?) before never ID'ing a suitable candidate and then frustrating yourself into not getting out of bed.

 

Your plan  for visiting Starbucks as prescribed is enough to inspire you to 

 

1)  get out of bed

2)  become presentable

3)  step away from the dangerous empty time where your mind can wander into self-loathing

 

FOCUS ON something ELSE when at Starbucks...   I don't care whether you're ordering on Amazon prime, or looking at rugs online...   just dedicate 2 hours every Sunday...  

(once the COVID coast is clear)

 

Your life probably isn't going to change a great deal without your consent...    so start envisioning a simple-ish plan like this and be ready to implement it when the coast is clear.

 

 

[ZA Dater]

9 hours ago, xoxobby_25 said:

Is there honestly something wrong with me? Every guy I approach ghosts me. Every. Single. One. I am almost 20 years old (female) and I can't get into a relationship. I am still a virgin because I am waiting to have a relationship. 

All I want is to physically meet someone. But no one asks to go on a date, and COVID is no excuse, these guys go out with their friends anyway. I've literally had enough. I dealt with all this s***  with this one guy (previous posts). Alot of people already hate me because of this situation. I feel pressured to move on because of this situation. 

I am not beautiful, but I am definitely not ugly. I stopped looking after myself, there's no point. I don't even want to get out of bed. I couldn't even go to uni yesterday because I felt so disgusting. Life doesn't feel worth living anymore. All my friends are in relationships and act like it's so easy. My therapist thinks I am not trying hard enough to talk to people. I've reached out to so many guys (most guys in person don't want to talk either) and they all ignore me. I can't date someone unless I'm physically attracted to them, attraction is really important for me. So the guys that do message me i'm not attracted to in the slightest.

I have dating anxiety. I truly think the last tinder fling, he was the most attractive guy in the world, and the only one who wasn't conceited. I feel anxious I'll never find a guy like him again. And I feel anxious if they are not as good as him.

I hate weekends because I know everyone is having sex and going on cute sunday beach dates while I'm alone or working. I hate looking at my virginless body and I know no guys would want to date me if they find this out. I don't even feel like me anymore. I feel like ending it all.   

Never ever give up. You need to look after you, take a step back and look at your life and I can assure you there is always something to be thankful for. Dating is but one part of life, you should never let it define your life or your self worth. You are very young so you have no reason to give up, challenge yourself but don't put yourself under massive pressure. Life is always worth living, even at the worst of times, the bad times make us appreciate the good times even more.

Take a break from dating and try clear your mind of these negative thoughts, never let dating take over your life, as someone who at 36 has nothing to show for my dating effort I can relate to how you feel but you need to be strong, at 20yo you have an entire life ahead of you, amazing opportunities and you need to look to the future with positivity.

[chillii]

5 hours ago, Datingdisabled said:

She doesn't say that and I personally don't agree in dating someone you aren't physically attracted to nor would I expect someone to date me if they weren't physically attracted to. She felt a connection to a man who she found to be gorgeous and felt like he liked her back. He didn't and she had to get over that drop. When a feeling is mutual like that then it is exciting and when they drop you like that, it's disappointing. She had every right to find that again and it's almost like you are advising her to settle. She doesn't sound conceited and you can't tell if someone is on this forum. You sound like you are trying to kick an ego that isn't there. You also can't kick an ego on a forum like this. The power bar solves it. 

 

 

Stillafool explained it better .

 

 

 

[Datingdisabled]

4 minutes ago, chillii said:

 

 

Stillafool explained it better .

 

 

 

I know what it's like to suffer mentally and she was consumed by an obsession. You react out of intense and raw emotion. The behavior is completely irrational and deluded by the situation, but that doesn't mean she is conceided. I don't like conceded or arrogant people either.

Edited September 11, 2020 by Datingdisabled

[chillii]

l wasn'tsaying she is conceited as such in that way , she actually sounds quite sweet in many ways, but the outcome is the same , in life and love reality checks us, we reap what we sew.

Edited September 11, 2020 by chillii

[Gemini3]

A lot of guys today dont like to be approached in person probably because our generation is all on dating apps now so meeting someone in person is like meeting a unicorn. People consider me attractive and this is 100% true for me too. So the whole "approaching a guy in person" thing probably has less to do with rejection and more to do with the fact that a lot of people are shy in person when flirting. 

NEVER give up on yourself or your appearance, you will regret that especially being so young. There are things you can do to improve yourself physically if you honestly dont like the way you look. For example, working out, eyebrow tweezing, shaving your legs, wearing your favorite outfits and perfume, finding new ways to do your make up, curling or straightening your hair or doing a cute style, etc. 

I stick to dating apps because its easier to start a conversation that way, but please realize that being in a relationship isnt something to be jealous about. For example, I already said people consider me attractive, but I just recently found out my boyfriend has been cheating on me. So count yourself lucky you arent dealing with the horrible issues that occur in relationships. If I had a dollar for every time I was cheated on...well...I'd have like, around, six dollars probably. ANYWAY...

My point is, you WILL meet the guy for you. I actually kind of wish I was a virgin still because all those ex's of mine didnt deserve my body. You just need a different perspective on things, thats all. Do not give up. 

Edited September 11, 2020 by Gemini3

[basil67]

10 hours ago, Datingdisabled said:

There are a couple posters who I would love to see how they would socialize in a room with someone like me at the table. Someone without a university degree and no desire to go and get one! 

I have no uni degree and am a full time carer to my disabled son.  My friends are all graduates and can easily converse with me despite our educational backgrounds being different.   Not sure where you're going with this.    Are you particularly difficult to talk with?

[Datingdisabled]

1 hour ago, basil67 said:

I have no uni degree and am a full time carer to my disabled son.  My friends are all graduates and can easily converse with me despite our educational backgrounds being different.   Not sure where you're going with this.    Are you particularly difficult to talk with?

Did I mention your name and to be fair, you are typically the first to comment on my posts as if you know me. If you do not like talking to me, don't post on my posts. 

[basil67]

You didn't mentioned anybody's name.   

I'm sure we could easily have a conversation if we met.  We may well find things in common.   I just couldn't figure out why you thought a university educated person couldn't talk with you.

I don't know how it happens that we see some people's posts more often than others.  Some posters I see loads of and other posters may come out of the blue and I don't realise that I've never seen any of their posts before.   I do wonder if there are Cookies going on in the background....but I suspect that coincidence of using the site at the same time is more to blame.  

[DarrenB]

For context:

• https://www.loveshack.org/forums/topic/595320-how-to-stop-being-so-obsessed-with-him/
• https://www.loveshack.org/forums/topic/596623-really-trying-hard-to-improve-my-life-but-it-is-so-difficult/

I feel it is correct to assume you are still majorly envious and obsessing over someone who previously ghosted you back in August last year.

Judging by your previous posts and topics, it's fairly evident that your desire to move forward has been minimal, as you've previously stated that you use obsession as a coping mechanism and as an escape from reality. 

The way you have depicted this guy in your head has made dating even harder for you, as you are not wanting to settle for anything less than what you personally assume this guy to be. 

I have a few questions:

• What steps have you taken since the beginning of August to detach from your unhealthy obsession with Mr 2019 and his girlfriend? you mentioned back in August that you took a social media break, but judging by this post it sounds as if that break was short lived.
• Are you still at your retail job? Have you considered every other possible option of employment within your area? Is your current finances stable enough to allow you to quit and take a few months off as a resting period? Among everything your health and well-being will always be more essential, and it is fair to say working in this role for over 3 years has contributed significantly to your discontent towards life.
• How often do you engage in social activities with other friends? not couples, but single friends. 

 

 

 

Edited September 12, 2020 by DarrenB

[Datingdisabled]

21 minutes ago, basil67 said:

You didn't mentioned anybody's name.   

I'm sure we could easily have a conversation if we met.  We may well find things in common.   I just couldn't figure out why you thought a university educated person couldn't talk with you.

I don't know how it happens that we see some people's posts more often than others.  Some posters I see loads of and other posters may come out of the blue and I don't realise that I've never seen any of their posts before.   I do wonder if there are Cookies going on in the background....but I suspect that coincidence of using the site at the same time is more to blame.  

I have been offended by a couple posters, and I'm not typically a sensitive person. I sympathize with you for caring for your disabled son full time and I commend you for doing that. your children should always come first and if they are the first choice then you made the right choice. I sympathize because it's not easy being a full time parent period. I had some online harassment regarding my education and have had one poster suggest someone was a loser for not having the same degree as she did. That aggravates me because although I am not university educated and I don't type like I am one, I make a good living now. It was definitely harder for me and took me longer but I managed. I get easily offended now because while this was happening, there was a real struggle moving past this person. 

Edited September 12, 2020 by Datingdisabled

[Datingdisabled]

20 minutes ago, DarrenB said:

For context:

• https://www.loveshack.org/forums/topic/595320-how-to-stop-being-so-obsessed-with-him/
• https://www.loveshack.org/forums/topic/596623-really-trying-hard-to-improve-my-life-but-it-is-so-difficult/

I feel it is correct to assume you are still majorly envious and obsessing over someone who previously ghosted you back in August last year.

Judging by your previous posts and topics, it's fairly evident that your desire to move forward has been minimal, as you've previously stated that you use obsession as a coping mechanism and as an escape from reality. 

The way you have depicted this guy in your head has made dating even harder for you, as you are not wanting to settle for anything less than what you personally assume this guy to be. 

I have a few questions:

• What steps have you taken since the beginning of August to detach from your unhealthy obsession with Mr 2019 and his girlfriend? you mentioned back in August that you took a social media break, but judging by this post it sounds as if that break was short lived.
• Are you still at your retail job? Have you considered every other possible option of employment within your area? Is your current finances stable enough to allow you to quit and take a few months off as a resting period? Among everything your health and well-being will always be more essential, and it is fair to say working in this role for over 3 years has contributed significantly to your discontent towards life.
• How often do you engage in social activities with other friends? not couples, but single friends. 

 

 

 

To be fair, I suffered with an obsession but he wasn't innocent. I wasn't in a good place mentally, he could sense the feelings towards him were intense and he messed with me which fed the obsession and kept it alive. I'm not obsessed today for many reasons. 

1. I fought back to his abuse. I told him exactly how it was. He did have a few come backs but I have clearly stated my point that he's not innocent in this. 

2. I got my mental health on track. I am awaiting treatment for my back problem and using online avenues to pass time. 

3. I developed my career.

4. I connected with old friends and one is coming over when I get settled. 

5. I fixed up my space.

6. Time. I spent enough time suffering before I realized this guy isn't ever going to want to go on a date like he wrote about and so I need to move on. Not that I would want to but that's how sick he was. 

Everything you write in your post is bang on! 

Edited September 12, 2020 by Datingdisabled

[basil67]

40 minutes ago, Datingdisabled said:

 have had one poster suggest someone was a loser for not having the same degree as she did. 

I'm sorry that happened to you.  I'm old enough to be of an age where we could work our way up from the bottom in many jobs without requiring a degree and so I know that there are canny people who don't have degrees and people who have degrees who are completely lacking in commonsense.

My builder's apprentice scored a university entrance score which would have given him access to any Uni in the country, but he wanted to work with his hands.   Nothing wrong with a non academic outcome.

[xoxobby_25]

12 hours ago, stillafool said:

Yes there are good looking people who will date below their looks but most will seek the best they can get because of what they have to offer.  OP you don't have to settle but you can't be angry at people because they, like you, want someone they are highly attracted to.  It is what it is and isn't anyone's fault.

Idk if this is just general advice or it is supposed to be specific to my situation. But if it is the latter I'm not angry at anyone. I am unfortunate that I can't date a near-perfect guy that I dream of but I know it's no one's fault.

[xoxobby_25]

5 hours ago, DarrenB said:

For context:

• https://www.loveshack.org/forums/topic/595320-how-to-stop-being-so-obsessed-with-him/
• https://www.loveshack.org/forums/topic/596623-really-trying-hard-to-improve-my-life-but-it-is-so-difficult/

I feel it is correct to assume you are still majorly envious and obsessing over someone who previously ghosted you back in August last year.

Judging by your previous posts and topics, it's fairly evident that your desire to move forward has been minimal, as you've previously stated that you use obsession as a coping mechanism and as an escape from reality. 

The way you have depicted this guy in your head has made dating even harder for you, as you are not wanting to settle for anything less than what you personally assume this guy to be. 

I have a few questions:

• What steps have you taken since the beginning of August to detach from your unhealthy obsession with Mr 2019 and his girlfriend? you mentioned back in August that you took a social media break, but judging by this post it sounds as if that break was short lived.
• Are you still at your retail job? Have you considered every other possible option of employment within your area? Is your current finances stable enough to allow you to quit and take a few months off as a resting period? Among everything your health and well-being will always be more essential, and it is fair to say working in this role for over 3 years has contributed significantly to your discontent towards life.
• How often do you engage in social activities with other friends? not couples, but single friends. 

1. I went on over a month hiatus and discussed it with my therapist for when I was deciding to get back on again. I haven't stalked him or his gf for 2 months (since the incident with his gf's supermodel friend). Social media isn't the problem as like I said, I no longer feel urges to look at what was hurting me. But I do fear that no one will ever be as near-perfect and treat me like he treat his gf (and how he treated me when he "liked" me). The fact that everyone wants a relationship like theirs and glorifies it, fills my obsessive thoughts. He's a very liked person. Even dumb things like the fact he owns a swimming pool, the newest phones, and doesn't post shirtless photos, and doesn't work on the weekend makes him a "near-perfect" guy in my eyes. I feel like there's no guy as good as him. 

2. Yes I am. December will be 3 1/2 years. It's my first and only job I've ever had since I was 16. I am a full time uni student and live at home. I went for a job interview recently but didn't get the job because of my uni schedule, not many employers want to employ full-time students, especially during these times. I've applied for many jobs. I want to quit so bad...but I still am saving up for things and need the money. I feel that things would be worse if I didn't have a job at all.

3. Majority of my friends aren't single and live far from me.  All my university friends are all studying online while I'm on campus so I am alone all day at uni. My friends were all single when I met them but got into relationships just before the pandemic. The few single friends I have are always working. So to answer that question, barely. I feel embarrassed asking my taken friends out because I know they will always respond that they are spending time with their bf's or they always want to do things at times when I'm at work. I feel like taken people are better than me at this point like him and his gf for example. His gf probably never feels loneliness going on perfect dates and having amazing sex with him.

 

Edited September 12, 2020 by xoxobby_25

[xoxobby_25]

7 hours ago, Gemini3 said:

A lot of guys today dont like to be approached in person probably because our generation is all on dating apps now so meeting someone in person is like meeting a unicorn. People consider me attractive and this is 100% true for me too. So the whole "approaching a guy in person" thing probably has less to do with rejection and more to do with the fact that a lot of people are shy in person when flirting. 

NEVER give up on yourself or your appearance, you will regret that especially being so young. There are things you can do to improve yourself physically if you honestly dont like the way you look. For example, working out, eyebrow tweezing, shaving your legs, wearing your favorite outfits and perfume, finding new ways to do your make up, curling or straightening your hair or doing a cute style, etc. 

I stick to dating apps because its easier to start a conversation that way, but please realize that being in a relationship isnt something to be jealous about. For example, I already said people consider me attractive, but I just recently found out my boyfriend has been cheating on me. So count yourself lucky you arent dealing with the horrible issues that occur in relationships. If I had a dollar for every time I was cheated on...well...I'd have like, around, six dollars probably. ANYWAY...

My point is, you WILL meet the guy for you. I actually kind of wish I was a virgin still because all those ex's of mine didnt deserve my body. You just need a different perspective on things, thats all. Do not give up. 

Firstly, i'm so sorry that happened to you. I can't stand cheaters, they are all scum imo. It's a shame that the guy i've put on a pedestal is the complete opposite of that. If i found out he had a cheating past (he was always the one being cheated on as he told me) i'd be over him in an ASAP. 

I agree with you. If it's not a dating app it's usually a guy messaging me on another social media platform. I'd probably have to be really intoxicated to reach out to a guy in the flesh. I'm going out to a pub tonight that is considered a local hangout and still no one reaches out to each other. It's sad lol. 

I never cared about being in a relationship until this year. Firstly when the guy I wanted got into one and how his gf friend found out I was obsessing over him so she told me to "move on because he don't want me". I feel pressured to be as good as all those people and feel like a loser. Even though he has no way to reach out to me, I still feel like I need to "prove him wrong". Even the girls he's been with in the past and his own friends have new partners, I hate what him and his circle think about me because they are all so popular. Not to mention 90% of my friends got a bf this year. I feel like I can't relate to my friends anymore as it seems like they've settled down. 

Thank you for your sweet advice  I hope you find a man who will treat you right ❤️ 

 

Edited September 12, 2020 by xoxobby_25

[Azincourt]

23 hours ago, xoxobby_25 said:

Is there honestly something wrong with me? Every guy I approach ghosts me. Every. Single. One. I am almost 20 years old (female) and I can't get into a relationship. I am still a virgin because I am waiting to have a relationship. 

Nah, there's nothing wrong with you. I've met several young women in their early 20s who were still not sexually active. Either because men were intimidated by how pretty they were and didn't approach,  these women wanted to be in a relationship before anything happened,  or the guys were just looking for sex.

Many, many, many guys your own age and slightly older aren't looking for a relationship. They're looking for sex. Did you know these days the vast majority of young men in Spain lose their virginities in a brothel?

They interviewed some guy and he said something like, ''why waste time and money on buying women a drink when the chances of getting sex are low and I don't even know if the sex is going to be good'' which leaves many, many Spanish young women without a boyfriend, because guys these days are lazy, entitled ,and they're afraid of rejection. They also want everything given to them for free!

Quote

All I want is to physically meet someone. But no one asks to go on a date, and COVID is no excuse, these guys go out with their friends anyway. I've literally had enough. I dealt with all this s***  with this one guy (previous posts). Alot of people already hate me because of this situation. I feel pressured to move on because of this situation. 

 

hahaahaha. No, covid-19 is an excuse, a very valid excuse.

Even if you was Selena Gomez, I wouldn't go out on a date with you. Because I very much value my life. I dunno why, man, but I like being alive? It's weird ain't it. I haven't been on a date since what January or February or whatever it is, and although I'm not thrilled about it, this is a lot better than ending up 6 feet under the ground, or developing health problems due to getting infected. Can't develop health issues if you don't get infected in the first place!

Well, one thing is to go out with friends, another is with someone they barely know, despite the fact that going out with friends these days is very silly, and I wouldn't do that.

 

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I am not beautiful, but I am definitely not ugly. I stopped looking after myself, there's no point.

 

There's plenty of men out there in the world who think you look just lovely. Don't worry about that. It's not your looks that is keeping you from having a decent dating life. It's covid-19. You should continue looking after yourself. I haven't met any women for the past 6+ months and I rarely go out, but I still clean-shave myself everyday, and I still mind what I eat, and I still make sure I smell good. It's for me!  Look great, feel great.

 

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I don't even want to get out of bed. I couldn't even go to uni yesterday because I felt so disgusting. Life doesn't feel worth living anymore. All my friends are in relationships and act like it's so easy. My therapist thinks I am not trying hard enough to talk to people. I've reached out to so many guys (most guys in person don't want to talk either) and they all ignore me. I can't date someone unless I'm physically attracted to them, attraction is really important for me. So the guys that do message me i'm not attracted to in the slightest.

 

Yo lady, you're not feeling down because of the state of your love life. You don't want to get out of bed, you feel disgusting, you feel like life isn't worth living anymore because you suffer from clinical depression. You're highly demotivated to do anything because you're going through a very rough emotional condition, which can only be treated, can only get better, if you pursue and seek out professional medical help to deal with your emotional and psychological issues.

Jesus, what is this fixation people have with what their friends have or don't have? Are we pack animals now or what? Be yourself. You're an individual. If your friends decide to join a convent are you going to follow them  to?

Most of my friends are either married or living with their girlrfriends, meanwhile I'm living on my own, walking around in nothing but my Cristiano Ronaldo(CR7) signed boxers all day long, with no one to put up with, and nothing to do other than what I want to do(reading books;watching movies; playing video games) and I'M LOVING IT.

Live for yourself. Live for what you love. Don't make a man the center of your Universe. Dudes die. Dudes turn out to be douchebags. Dudes turn out to be good people but the relationship doesn't work and that's life. What you gonna do? Join Pope Francis and become  a bride of Jesus Christ?

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I have dating anxiety. I truly think the last tinder fling, he was the most attractive guy in the world, and the only one who wasn't conceited. I feel anxious I'll never find a guy like him again. And I feel anxious if they are not as good as him.

I hate weekends because I know everyone is having sex and going on cute sunday beach dates while I'm alone or working. I hate looking at my virginless body and I know no guys would want to date me if they find this out. I don't even feel like me anymore. I feel like ending it all.   

Oh, please. Take it from me.  The world  is populated with hot men, and no man is truly that special that he can't be easily replaced given enough time. Even Brad Pitt himself has stated with a smile that his romantic life is a disaster.

You think a hot guy has everything he wants? LMAO, look at David Beckham and the mess of a life he has, not even all of his money and beauty has kept him from having a troubled romantic life.

Chill and enjoy your life,  go to the doctor, go to the psychologist, get professional help.

Most people aren't having sex 24/7, and with 41 million people out of a job, there's countless numbers of people who'd love to be in your spot working on a sunday.

Yeah,  don't go talking like that.

''my virginless body'' or I'm going to start thinking you're a dude pretending to be a woman, trolling the forum, because you're bored out of your mind.

Plenty of guys would reject you if they find out you're a virgin, but that's easy enough to find out about a woman without the need for words, yes. I would totally reject you if you were a virgin, but that's because I'm in my 30s and the thought of sleeping with a virgin is as exciting as getting my teeth cleaned out by the dentist.

I usually fall asleep during it.

But there are lots and lots of men who don't mind sleeping with a virgin, just gotta find the guy who cares about you, respect you, takes his time, doesn't pressure you, and loves y ou and all that sweet, sweet, jazz.

Lots of guys enjoy being approached ,but you have to be decent about it to get the guy to not think something is wrong with you. I like being approached, but she gotta be self-confident, have high levels of self-esteem, and she gotta be sexy about it.  I ain't into getting approached by women who have no sexual experience.

 

Edited September 12, 2020 by Azincourt

[Wiseman2]

It would be best to get evaluated by a physician for underlying medical and mood disorders.

Not getting out of bed and neglected self care is not about anyone else or dating or social media 

A good work up and ongoing therapy support would help you a lot more than complaining.

[Azincourt]

5 hours ago, Wiseman2 said:

It would be best to get evaluated by a physician for underlying medical and mood disorders.

Not getting out of bed and neglected self care is not about anyone else or dating or social media 

A good work up and ongoing therapy support would help you a lot more than complaining.

Yeah, that's a classic sympton of depression. Plus she doesn't want to take care of herself anymore, meaning she doesn't want to eat, doesn't want to shower, doesn't want to brush her teeth, doesn't want to put on clean clothes, and doesn't want to talk to anyone or see anyone.

Complaining is a waste of time. Unless you're Jeff Bezos ex-wife and you can complain your way into a 60 billion dollars payout, I'm going to go ahead and say what you should be looking for is not a boyfriend, but a specialized doctor to listen to you, help you out, and get yourself back on your feet!