I feel like just giving up on myself.

[Datingdisabled]

16 hours ago, basil67 said:

I'm sorry that happened to you.  I'm old enough to be of an age where we could work our way up from the bottom in many jobs without requiring a degree and so I know that there are canny people who don't have degrees and people who have degrees who are completely lacking in commonsense.

My builder's apprentice scored a university entrance score which would have given him access to any Uni in the country, but he wanted to work with his hands.   Nothing wrong with a non academic outcome.

You may believe age is a factor but I'm in the trades. I can assure you that tickets and apprenticeships don't mean anything unless you are being pulled on with no experience. It doesn't matter how long you have been doing it, as long as you can deliver and your skills set. I know men in my field who picked the trade up in six months and make a killing. I also have a legit and legal business and am considered a sub contractor. The funny part about this, you can't do anything besides form an opinion of me that won't change anything. I don't need approval from anyone if i am happy and paying the bills legally and morally if I may say. I can show you pictures of the final product and that's what matters. 

Edited September 12, 2020 by Datingdisabled

[Azincourt]

Yeah, but these days most women feel that unless a man has a college-education, he can't support a family.  

Tho, why raise a family when you can get a good job and buy a lamborghini instead for the same amount of cash, is beyond me *shrugs*

[Datingdisabled]

Just now, Azincourt said:

Yeah, but these days most women feel that unless a man has a college-education, he can't support a family.  

Tho, why raise a family when you can get a good job and buy a lamborghini instead for the same amount of cash, is beyond me *shrugs*

I know tons of people who make a killing and can't write or speak like an engineer. I know women who just want to date an engineer. It's society and how involved someone is with fitting into it. It's all preference. 

[Azincourt]

Yeah, there are plumbers making 100k a year, but being married to a doctor or a dentist has more social gravitas, and I guess they feel great about themselves when they meet new women and those women ask what their husbands do for a living.

[Datingdisabled]

11 minutes ago, Azincourt said:

Yeah, but these days most women feel that unless a man has a college-education, he can't support a family.  

Tho, why raise a family when you can get a good job and buy a lamborghini instead for the same amount of cash, is beyond me *shrugs*

 

7 minutes ago, Azincourt said:

Yeah, there are plumbers making 100k a year, but being married to a doctor or a dentist has more social gravitas, and I guess they feel great about themselves when they meet new women and those women ask what their husbands do for a living.

There are some gorgeous men in the trades who do very well in dating and with what they have in assets. I think most women would feel great around these men then drs but again, it is preference. I've worked with men that have made me melt but not too often. I am always gonna back trades guys over corporate any day!

Edit: I've also met one dr who made me melt. He was the sweetest Chinese dr and I knew he would be a compassionate and caring husband to his wife. 

Edited September 12, 2020 by Datingdisabled

[Datingdisabled]

Further @basil67, the highest level you can reach in the trades if you want tickets is red seal. All a red seal means is you can work anywhere. It holds no values to anyone on site. It's finished product and time in this industry. 

[basil67]

I would say that the highest level you can reach in a trade is owning your own successful business and then employing others and further expanding.  

To be honest though, I haven’t seen anyone here being rude about tradespeople.   I’m not denying something your experience, but I would not say it’s the usual.

[Datingdisabled]

25 minutes ago, basil67 said:

I would say that the highest level you can reach in a trade is owning your own successful business and then employing others and further expanding.  

To be honest though, I haven’t seen anyone here being rude about tradespeople.   I’m not denying something your experience, but I would not say it’s the usual.

I'm not discussing the trades with you. My experience and my career is quite frankly, not your business and it shouldn't be your concern. 

Edited September 12, 2020 by Datingdisabled

[Datingdisabled]

27 minutes ago, basil67 said:

I would say that the highest level you can reach in a trade is owning your own successful business and then employing others and further expanding.  

To be honest though, I haven’t seen anyone here being rude about tradespeople.   I’m not denying something your experience, but I would not say it’s the usual.

Exactly. I own my own company and I just hired four guys. You can complain and think you know an industry, but I make money at it, and you can't stop me. 

[basil67]

I was being positive talking about how successful one can be in the trades.   Your response sure took a turn I wasn't expecting.

Anyway, probably best to be back to the OP and her issues anyway - we were going very off topic. 

[xoxobby_25]

14 hours ago, Azincourt said:

Oh, please. Take it from me.  The world  is populated with hot men, and no man is truly that special that he can't be easily replaced given enough time. Even Brad Pitt himself has stated with a smile that his romantic life is a disaster.

Oh trust me. This guy wasn't only attractive but he's literally the perfect partner. Like it seems too good to be true how perfect their relationship is. He's one of a kind. 

14 hours ago, Azincourt said:

Plenty of guys would reject you if they find out you're a virgin, but that's easy enough to find out about a woman without the need for words, yes. I would totally reject you if you were a virgin, but that's because I'm in my 30s and the thought of sleeping with a virgin is as exciting as getting my teeth cleaned out by the dentist.

Well that defs didn't increase my anxiety 🤣

[Datingdisabled]

1 minute ago, xoxobby_25 said:

Oh trust me. This guy wasn't only attractive but he's literally the perfect partner. Like it seems too good to be true how perfect their relationship is. He's one of a kind. 

Well that defs didn't increase my anxiety 🤣

That's the obsession talking. Is this your first experience with an obsession? I wouldn't recommend dating at all right now but I can assure you, with a little reflection and looking at other men, even if not in person, he wasn't the perfect man.

[Datingdisabled]

7 minutes ago, xoxobby_25 said:

Oh trust me. This guy wasn't only attractive but he's literally the perfect partner. Like it seems too good to be true how perfect their relationship is. He's one of a kind. 

Well that defs didn't increase my anxiety 🤣

People have told me on this forum that i am left overs for being single at my age. In real life, they say stay single, you are smart. No one is going to change my oppinion on this forum. 

Edited September 13, 2020 by Datingdisabled

[basil67]

6 minutes ago, xoxobby_25 said:

Oh trust me. This guy wasn't only attractive but he's literally the perfect partner. Like it seems too good to be true how perfect their relationship is. He's one of a kind. 

Nobody is perfect.   Those we think are perfect are people who we don't know properly.  

[xoxobby_25]

7 hours ago, Azincourt said:

Yeah, but these days most women feel that unless a man has a college-education, he can't support a family.  

Tho, why raise a family when you can get a good job and buy a lamborghini instead for the same amount of cash, is beyond me *shrugs*

Funny how you guys are discussing this on my posts. In Australia "tradies" are literally frothed over. They are definitely capable of supporting families and being successful (more likely if they start their own business). The guy I wanted is a carpenter and his hardworking ethic and tanned physique is one of the many reasons why I think he is so great. 

Edited September 13, 2020 by xoxobby_25

[Datingdisabled]

20 minutes ago, xoxobby_25 said:

Funny how you guys are discussing this on my posts. In Australia "tradies" are literally frothed over. They are definitely capable of supporting families and being successful (more likely if they start their own business). The guy I wanted is a carpenter and his hardworking ethic and tanned physique is one of the many reasons why I think he is so great. 

I'm a female though. I have my own business but I don't do it for the status. I am very disappointed that people would go as far as to do an engineer's dirty work for him. I am glad he was that valuable to you all. I really am 

[Datingdisabled]

33 minutes ago, xoxobby_25 said:

Funny how you guys are discussing this on my posts. In Australia "tradies" are literally frothed over. They are definitely capable of supporting families and being successful (more likely if they start their own business). The guy I wanted is a carpenter and his hardworking ethic and tanned physique is one of the many reasons why I think he is so great. 

No, trades men can be more successful working for companies. It's very difficult to start your own business and make money. It's not a guarantee. A lot if people do it then back out. You can be successful at any business but don't assume all trades guys are gonna make a fortune from business. You need to understand not assume. I do understand. 

[xoxobby_25]

18 minutes ago, Datingdisabled said:

No, trades men can be more successful working for companies. It's very difficult to start your own business and make money. It's not a guarantee. A lot if people do it then back out. You can be successful at any business but don't assume all trades guys are gonna make a fortune from business. You need to understand not assume. I do understand. 

I meant a successful business. Trades are always in demand.

[xoxobby_25]

2 hours ago, Datingdisabled said:

People have told me on this forum that i am left overs for being single at my age. In real life, they say stay single, you are smart. No one is going to change my oppinion on this forum. 

Being single just feels so lonely now. For some reason 2020 is the year where everyone got into relationships. I get jealous of the "perfect" dates that everyone seems to be going on. Even my trusty single friend is seeing someone that will likely turn into a relationship and I honestly will not have any more avaliable single friends. I even tried going on Bumble BFF but they are all flakey and majority of those girls have boyfriends. I feel really left out for some reason and like a loser. 

Guys on dating sites are getting worse. More flakey/always ignore and just weird in general. I want to be happy single but it's worse as you are losing all your friends to relationships. We even lost one good friend this year because she kept putting her boyfriend first. 

[xoxobby_25]

2 hours ago, basil67 said:

Nobody is perfect.   Those we think are perfect are people who we don't know properly.  

He was never "perfect" when I was talking to him (for obvious reasons which I explain in my previous posts). But what I've witnessed this guy do for his gf no guy would ever think of doing (I also explain that in my previous posts). Everyone thinks he's the "best boyfriend ever". Honestly if I showed you his socials (which I wouldn't because I have not checked for 2 months and don't want to check because it hurts me so terribly) you'd think he's a perfect bf as well. He's what every girl wants including myself in a partner. They always look cuter than every other couple, one friend posted a polaroid picture with them in it for their friend's birthday. Only the couple were tagged, and the only couple holding each other sharing a blanket. Why would her supermodel friend mention how "loving and committed" her relationship is to me and how amazing his gf is publicly if it isn't close to perfect. I also saw that her work boss heart reacted that ultra cute Facebook profile picture he updated. I was in a bad place and was intensely stalking, and I saw that this boss doesn't support other relationships and no one seemed to care when about his gf's ex bf when they were dating. 

He's just a great guy overall and has definitely changed from his old ways that I witnessed. He's very popular and liked by a lot of people. Has most of his life put together. It's understandable that he chose to date someone as popular, beautiful, and wealthy as he was. I can see why they are together. Their families are even more compatible than mine (they've both got a healthy opposite sex sibling (he would have never have befriended my brother as he has a severe intellectual disability) and her dad owns a successful construction company, he works in construction). I haven't been out of the country in years and they both got to go on holidays. His GF owns two Gucci bags (I'm pretty sure he got her one). He probably thinks I'm a loser as he knows about my virginity and the fact that I've never been in a relationship while all the girls and his friends around him have partners. He managed to get people I don't know against me for my regretful behaviours. Heck, everyone around me has a partner now. 

I do believe amazing people are compatible with amazing people. The guys I seem to be interested to him and that are similarly on his level never want me. I feel like I need to find someone as good or better (which feels impossible) otherwise I feel like i've failed myself. I've accepted that there is no chance between me and the other guy. 

[basil67]

I'm sorry Hon, but it really sounds like you've placed them on some kind of pedestal.  Their relationship isn't perfect because no relationship is perfect.    Friends may make observations about them based on superficial criteria, but nobody knows what's going on behind the scenes.

[Azincourt]

8 hours ago, basil67 said:

I would say that the highest level you can reach in a trade is owning your own successful business and then employing others and further expanding.  

To be honest though, I haven’t seen anyone here being rude about tradespeople.   I’m not denying something your experience, but I would not say it’s the usual.

The highest level?

A person can have a comfortable life without having to reach the highest level, and making good money doesn't really mean that much where it concerns having a happy life. My dad had a boss when he was 21 who used to make 10k a month, then there were the annual bonuses based on performance, but the guy was unhappy with all of the responsabilities and stress laid out on him, and he aged out FAST.

When I was 17 I was working for a dude during the summer who worked for another dude. House paid off before he was 50 years old, attractive young blonde wife, 2 daughters, nice car, and he had no stress about him.  Just two dudes working out of a van fixing windows and doors and floors,  and the only worker they employed was me, and that was more of a favor they did for my father than out of a need for workers. Good times.

The guy is in his 70 and still has all of his thick hair!

And he's still healthy.I reckon the lack of stress and drama in his life is the one major reason for that. I wouldn't want to be the president of a company.  The money is alright, I guess, but I don't really have that many expenses, so the stress would just not be worth it.

[Azincourt]

Quote

Funny how you guys are discussing this on my posts. In Australia "tradies" are literally frothed over. They are definitely capable of supporting families and being successful (more likely if they start their own business). The guy I wanted is a carpenter and his hardworking ethic and tanned physique is one of the many reasons why I think he is so great. 

I realy don't know much about Australia other that it's the Country from where Chris Hemsworth comes from, and that they filmed the Mad Max movies with Mel Gibson there, so I'll take your word for it.

Well, maybe the guy felt like you've transformed him into a success object? 

Hardworking, making good money, being able to support a family. I mean, think about it. How many women enjoy being treated as sex objects? Men feel the same way, albeit when it happens to a man, it's mostly him being treated as a way to make a woman's life better, easier, and to facilitate her societal-imprinted desire to have children. And that's not sexy. Not sexy at all. It doesn't make me feel hot at all.

Maybe the guy wants to feel like you are attracted to him, not to his money, and I'm assuming the majority of Australian men are toned and jacked, which would make the guy feel like you ain't all that much into his body because his body-build is common place amongst Australian men?

When I was working in Greece, I always made it a point to not let women know that I was working there, and that I had a house(I was renting it from a friend) because this was way back in 2010,  only a couple of years after the total obliteration of the Greek economy, and I didn't want women to start getting any funny ideas of how good of a husband I'd be, you know, being one of the few guys who can actually afford a family and a wife.

So I played it smart and told them I was broke,  lived with a bunch of roomates, and wasn't going to be getting any job any time soon. This weeded out the women who were only interested in dating me because I could provide a better life for them and for any kid they wanted to have, from the women who were actually interested and attracted to me. 

Now that's some big brain 500IQ play right there.

Quote

People have told me on this forum that i am left overs for being single at my age. In real life, they say stay single, you are smart. No one is going to change my oppinion on this forum. 

Who cares? There's lots of bitter people residing on relationship forums. If you enjoy your life(you don't seem tho, and you need to fix that) that's all that matters.

Quote

He was never "perfect" when I was talking to him (for obvious reasons which I explain in my previous posts). But what I've witnessed this guy do for his gf no guy would ever think of doing (I also explain that in my previous posts). Everyone thinks he's the "best boyfriend ever". Honestly if I showed you his socials (which I wouldn't because I have not checked for 2 months and don't want to check because it hurts me so terribly)

You're interested in a guy who is already in a relationship? A happy one? Maybe you should strive to meet men who aren't in a relationship?

You might want to talk to your psychologist about how much it hurts to stalk his social media to see how happy he is with his girlfriend and how unhappy you are over not being his picture-perfect barbie doll of a girlfriend, and honestly, dude sounds like a Ken. Don't you think you're reaching out for the stars when getting onto the first step on a ladder is already a bit hard with your depression, lack of experience in the dating world etc?

Quote

 

you'd think he's a perfect bf as well. He's what every girl wants including myself in a partner. They always look cuter than every other couple, one friend posted a polaroid picture with them in it for their friend's birthday. Only the couple were tagged, and the only couple holding each other sharing a blanket. Why would her supermodel friend mention how "loving and committed" her relationship is to me and how amazing his gf is publicly if it isn't close to perfect. I also saw that her work boss heart reacted that ultra cute Facebook profile picture he updated. I was in a bad place and was intensely stalking, and I saw that this boss doesn't support other relationships and no one seemed to care when about his gf's ex bf when they were dating. 

Dude, life isn't 'Home And Away' you ain't gonna be getting your Prince Charming because that Prince Charming already has his Cinderella. Stop worrying about other people's relationships and their happiness and focus on yourself.  You might have a bit of emotional growing up to do, not to mention the fact that if this dude is dating supermodels, he's probably independently wealthy, or he's some 22 year old Chris Hemsworth or something, so unless you can match up with his girlfriend in looks,  It's gonna be quite complicated for you to get what you want.

You remind me of that other dude on this forum who lacks absolute dating experience, has no social life, no friends,  and he wants women who could work as fashion models. Maybe I should get the two of you together... 

[Azincourt]

5 hours ago, xoxobby_25 said:

Being single just feels so lonely now. For some reason 2020 is the year where everyone got into relationships. I get jealous of the "perfect" dates that everyone seems to be going on. Even my trusty single friend is seeing someone that will likely turn into a relationship and I honestly will not have any more avaliable single friends. I even tried going on Bumble BFF but they are all flakey and majority of those girls have boyfriends. I feel really left out for some reason and like a loser. 

Guys on dating sites are getting worse. More flakey/always ignore and just weird in general. I want to be happy single but it's worse as you are losing all your friends to relationships. We even lost one good friend this year because she kept putting her boyfriend first. 

 

How is 2020 the year everyone is getting into relationships?

The entire world's feels like we're back to the black plague days, everyone's avoiding each other like they owe money to the IRS and they don't know which random person they walk by is an IRS agent on the hunt for money.

Everyone's paranoid to just stand near each other, and people already established romantic relationships are already strained with the whole putting up with each other everyday all day.

People aren't going on perfect dates. People for the most part aren't going on dates, and those people who are going on dates are staying apart from each other by 8 feet, talking to each other through a face mask, afraid of touching anything because of the possibility it might be infected with the virus.

Do you take your cues of how the world works and what people have or don't have in their interpersonal relationships from what you see on facebook? I know that people your age grew up on social media,  but has it gotten that bad that if the internet was to end for any reason you folks wouldn't know what to do with your lives?

And? Your life is going to be miserable because your friends can't give you attention? You need to be happy on your own. You need to make yourself happy. Most of my friends are living with their girlfriends,  or they're single but don't have the time anymore because having a job, a house, a dog, responsabilities, obligations, demands on their part, takes away the time they'd otherwise have to be on facebook and to stalk  other people's profiles to compare those folks lives to their own.

Dude you sound like you still have a high school mentality. Losers, cool people, the cheerleader, the jock, the nerds. You need to grow up as a person and to abandon behind you all of that teenagerish overdramatic ''my life isn't perfect, I am so lonely'' persona because you're 22, dude. You're an adult.  And you need to act your age.

Quote

Guys on dating sites are getting worse. More flakey/always ignore and just weird in general. I want to be happy single but it's worse as you are losing all your friends to relationships. We even lost one good friend this year because she kept putting her boyfriend first. 

Maybe it's because those guys you've met have the emotional intelligence to understand that romantic relationships at your age are as fickle as Johnny Depp's ex-wife and they aren't interested in putting so much of themselves into a relationship because there's stuff like, soccer, football, basebal, basketball, video games, books, movies, surfing, swimming, body building, long-walks, hiking, playing with the neighbhood's dogs, and chilling knowing that your qualit of life is much higher than that of most people around the world.

Chill. You're young. You'll meet a lot of guys in your future.

[xoxobby_25]

3 hours ago, Azincourt said:

You might want to talk to your psychologist about how much it hurts to stalk his social media to see how happy he is with his girlfriend and how unhappy you are over not being his picture-perfect barbie doll of a girlfriend, and honestly, dude sounds like a Ken. Don't you think you're reaching out for the stars when getting onto the first step on a ladder is already a bit hard with your depression, lack of experience in the dating world etc?

Yea he really is amazing. I'm surprised he showed any interest in me in the first place? I knew it was too good to be true. But I haven't stalked his or her social media in 2 months. I went crazy seeing their relationship that looked as amazing as one of those romantic Netflix original films. It hurt me. Stuff i've already seen...I still think about it. I may get another guy but it won't be amazing as him. I just wasn't met for a guy as good.

 

 

 

Edited September 13, 2020 by xoxobby_25