Is it normal to have a crush on this forum?

[Erik30]

On 9/13/2020 at 3:59 PM, elaine567 said:

HE could be a SHE or gay or dating or happily married, or a confirmed bachelor or just not interested in meeting anyone from an anonymous forum.
Also he may be highly embarrassed about being singled out publicly.
A PM message may have answered some of those questions before you got so invested. 

Yup, that picture you like so much might not even be him. I would never use my own pictures on this forum, it would be way too embarrassing if someone I'm dating or an ex found one of my threads. (Especially if it's about them)

I do get it though, it's kind of like a celebrity crush. Don't expect it to go anywhere. It would be different if you exchanged numbers and if he also knew what you look like. If it's all just posts on your threads, he's basically a friendly stranger, nothing more. I doubt he has any feelings in that case, sorry 

[JRabbit]

Just be careful, the person you think may know on this forum might not be at all who they are in real life. They may be who their photo is, but they may also be giving advice they don't take themselves and acting a way that doesn't match their real life actions.  I have seen that a few times!

I would also be careful about messaging them, since most would like their forum time to be a safe space.

Edited September 14, 2020 by JRabbit

[SumGuy]

Sounds like a question that would be good for a poll.  Was going to do it but realize have no idea how to set up a poll here.

[Piddy]

Full disclosure:  Just in case anyone has a crush on me because of my avatar.    That's not me.    I'm actually much better looking. 

[MeadowFlower]

1 hour ago, Piddy said:

I'm actually much better looking. 

And incredibly modest.. lol

 

OP - I'd say it's fairly normal to have a crush on someone on a forum. They are people after all, behind the words. And you can get to see their inner selves sometimes, through what they write. 

 

And if any one is keeping tally here lol, I too have a crush. 

[CaliforniaGirl]

1 hour ago, Piddy said:

Full disclosure:  Just in case anyone has a crush on me because of my avatar.    That's not me.    I'm actually much better looking. 

We knew that.

[La.Primavera]

A crush is totally normal, but creating a thread about it is just way too thirsty in my opinion.

[Piddy]

@basil67  You are confused for a very good reason.  The guy in my avatar is Tom Brady.  A very famous American football player.  He's won 6 Super Bowls (Championships).   Understandable that you've never heard of him in Australia.

However, I think you and I are similar in age.  In my /your younger days I was told I looked like a very famous actor who's no longer with us.  So, not a complete untruth about being better looking. lol   

Edited September 15, 2020 by Piddy

[Piddy]

38 minutes ago, CaliforniaGirl said:

We knew that.

What did you know?  That it wasn't me or that I was better looking. haha.  Being a 'California' Girl I'm sure you knew it was Tom Brady.  Because for those that don't know that's where Tom is from.  

And actually it's my wife that has the crush on Tom Brady.  🥰  I like Giselle (his wife) better myself.  

Edited September 15, 2020 by Piddy

[basil67]

Oh Piddy, I feel so let down.  I knew we were of a similar age, and I thought you'd done so remarkably well in your appearance.    And you're right - I haven't heard of Tom Brady 

[CaliforniaGirl]

11 minutes ago, Piddy said:

What did you know?  That it wasn't me or that I was better looking. haha.  Being a 'California' Girl I'm sure you knew it was Tom Brady.  Because for those that don't know that's where Tom is from.  

And actually it's my wife that has the crush on Tom Brady.  🥰  I like Giselle (his wife) better myself.  

That you're better looking!

P.s. I'm not sure who doesn't have a crush on Tom Brady. (Did you see the movie Ted, BTW? So funny. ETA: sorry, it might have been Ted 2.) I think if Tom were to join this forum that poll SumGuy is pulling together would lean so heavily it will basically fall right over. 

Tom Brady is impossibly capable at an older age (for football) and is kind of a freak of nature. 

I'm thinking...aliens.

Sorry, folks, carry on.

Edited September 15, 2020 by CaliforniaGirl

[Piddy]

23 minutes ago, basil67 said:

Oh Piddy, I feel so let down.  I knew we were of a similar age, and I thought you'd done so remarkably well in your appearance.    And you're right - I haven't heard of Tom Brady 

@basil67 I'm so sorry I let you down.   If you want to see what I used to look like back in our day, look up the movie Superman (1978).  😉  Those days are gone of course, but great memories.  

 

Edited September 15, 2020 by Piddy

[Piddy]

15 minutes ago, CaliforniaGirl said:

That you're better looking!

P.s. I'm not sure who doesn't have a crush on Tom Brady. (Did you see the movie Ted, BTW? So funny.) I think if Tom were to join this forum that poll SumGuy is pulling together would lean so heavily it will basically fall right over. 

Tom Brady is impossibly capable at an older age (for football) and is kind of a freak of nature. 

I'm thinking...aliens.

Sorry, folks, carry on.

Both Ted movies are a riot.  🤣  Tom played his part very well.  haha   And Mark Wahlberg is from Boston.  I happen to have a thick Boston accent (Cape Cod actually) myself.  I'm in Florida now and Tom is playing for the Tampa Bay Buccaneers.  Tom doesn't owe us New England fans anything.  He's given us a lifetime of memories.  

I like your Daenerys Tagaryen / Emilia Clarke avatar.

Edited September 15, 2020 by Piddy

[CaliforniaGirl]

6 minutes ago, Piddy said:

Both Ted movies area riot.  🤣  Tom played his part very well.  haha   And Mark Wahlberg is from Boston.  I happen to have a thick Boston accent (Cape Cod actually) myself.  I'm in Florida now and Tom is playing for the Tampa Bay Buccaneers.  Tom doesn't owe us New England fans anything.  He's given us a lifetime of memories.  

Yeah, we watched the Bucs yesterday. I am originally from the northeast. The Pats are more or less rivals to the teams I like. Plus, they win too often. So I always disliked the Pats...except for Brady. Oh the pain and confusion. My husband laughs because the quarterback is pretty much like an engine, take it out and you no longer have a car. 😂 He gives my logic a big old WTF there.

Just so the mods don't get annoyed with me...the point stands...a pic isn't necessarily the person...we all known that but I'm this case I think it bears repeating.

FWIW, in my case, I actually am the person in my avatar.

[DarrenB]

1 hour ago, CaliforniaGirl said:

FWIW, in my case, I actually am the person in my avatar.

I bend the knee to you, Queen Daenerys 👸

[Chilli]

7 hours ago, DarrenB said:

I bend the knee to you, Queen Daenerys 👸

 Careful , you know how temperamental knees can be.

 

[Datingdisabled]

Okay, the moment you have all been waiting for! UPDATE; My crush doesn't feel the same. He felt bad telling me because he didn't want to hurt my feelings and he didn't want me to give up since I had a bad experience. He had another poster message me and try to show me all the reasons why I don't have a crush on him and need to go find someone in the real world. He's so sweet ☺️

So I'm off for another week and maybe a few days next week with my injuries. I am taking it easy and resting as much as I can. I'm still on the hunt for a dog and trying to join some social groups offline but I think I don't want anything to do with crushes for a while! A long while. Hehe blush blush. 

Edited September 15, 2020 by a LoveShack.org Moderator
Removed quoted deleted comment.

[MeadowFlower]

@Datingdisabled You're taking that well. That would stink. 

[Datingdisabled]

29 minutes ago, MeadowFlower said:

@Datingdisabled You're taking that well. That would stink. 

He was kind enough to leave me alone after he did that. Wasn't like there was any over kill or people over doing it. It was done with class so how can I not take it well. He also chose the messenger wisely. No one too questionable! 

Edited September 15, 2020 by Datingdisabled

[lana-banana]

Eeeugh. Talking about romantic feelings or lack thereof and interactions with other people who are (virtually) here, without their consent---I'm not a fan. Furthermore, I think what happens in private messages should stay in private messages unless you have the express permission of the other party. 

I don't know! This whole thing makes me feel weird! Maybe I'm just weird.

[poppyfields]

3 hours ago, Datingdisabled said:

He was kind enough to leave me alone after he did that. Wasn't like there was any over kill or people over doing it. It was done with class so how can I not take it well. He also chose the messenger wisely. No one too questionable! 

Hey DD, how did you convey your crush to him, via private message?  And the messenger's response to you, also private message?  

Or was this all done on the open forum, if so I missed it!  😂

Glad to hear you're okay with it and I'm sorry to hear that your injuries are keeping you off work.

Feel better.  

Edited September 15, 2020 by poppyfields

[poppyfields]

I wasn't allowed messaging privileges until at least two months after I joined, apparently that's changed, which is great, I thought two months was way too long! 

[poppyfields]

2 hours ago, lana-banana said:

Furthermore, I think what happens in private messages should stay in private messages unless you have the express permission of the other party. 

Agree!  But wondering if this was done via private messaging; DD joined this forum less than two weeks ago, too soon to be allowed messaging privileges.

Like I said, it took literally two months from the day I joined to be allowed messaging privileges!

Maybe that's changed but two weeks sounds awfully soon.  

 

Edited September 15, 2020 by poppyfields

[Datingdisabled]

2 minutes ago, poppyfields said:

Agree!  But wondering if this was done via private messaging; DD joined this forum less than a week ago, too soon to be allowed messaging privileges.

Like I said, it took literally two months from the day I joined to be allowed me upssaging privileges!

Maybe that's changed but one week sounds awfully soon.  

It was done on the forum but the posts got deleted. My responses did too so I don't know what happened. I don't yet fully know my way around the forum. I think this poster also mentioned a girlfriend of three years. I respect how quick he put my infatuation to rest. It was very kind of him! There are definitely great men out there but I haven't met one yet. I will but in the mean time, I think I deserve to heal from two rejections in a row! 

[gaius]

Crushes and flirtations of varying degrees happen here all the time, I married another poster for example, and it's fine to talk about them honestly on the open board.

But the way you went about it, announcing you had a crush to everyone instead of trying to create intimacy with the person in a one on one setting, it's like you deliberately set yourself up for failure. Like it wasn't a real attempt on your part. That's not how you act if you're really attracted to someone and want them. 

Depression can do that, make you self sabotage. It's entirely possible your recent string of rejections are entirely self inflicted and you don't even realize it.