breakthrough

[dali]

Hi,My boyfriend of 3 years just broke up with me, 3 weeks ago. we still live in the same Appartment. I'm looking for the new House.

 

Before one month, he went to Moroko for Meeting, and just met a girl.As this Time we were together.

 

He came Back, they just talk in Moroko, they didn't start and Romance. After he came, he break up with me, He went yesterday to her (she lives 6Hours Drive from his place) and told me he will be back on Sunday. I'm so seek, i lost my brother 2 weeks ago, i'm already down, and i don't know how to survive the break up. I feel sick, i'wont him back,but i don't think that he wants me back, because he woudn't do that if he thinks about us??????

 

so please help, How can i breakthrouh??

[Tony T]

This is a very difficult time for you. I am so sorry for the loss of your brother. The fact that your ex boyfriend is not there and being supportive during your time of grief is absolute proof that this relationship is over.

 

MOVE OUT AS SOON AS POSSIBLE. You must get away from this guy. Go back to family, move in with friends, or do whatever you have to do to get away from this man and the pain you will constantly go through if you stay. Forget him and forget getting back with him.

 

This guy is a total jerk, knowing you still care for him yet letting you know he is leaving for days to see another girl somewhere.

 

Do whatever you need to do to forget this guy. You must face the fact that this relationship is over. You do not need to be around a guy who is so unfeeling and inconsiderate.

 

I know this is extremely painful for you but you must begin to heal now and the only way you'll be able to do this is to get away from where you are now.

 

And if you expect to have love without some pain here and there, you are very wrong.

 

It is tragic that you are having to deal with this and the grief of the loss of your brother at the same time. Please be sure to get the emotional support of friends and family during this period. If none are available, be sure to talk to a psychologist or counsellor who can help you deal with all this.

[dali]

Hi Tony, how can i lose 2 people as the same time.

 

how can i deal with it. you know my brother i can't get him back. but my bf atleast i can try. you know the pain thing is i beg and cry not to do it, and he said no and he went. i called him this morning, and i told him i can't, please visit her another time but not now, and please be back. and you know what he said, why do you call me , i told you it is over, go to your family or somewhere. i'll back on sunday. i feel very good right now please don't disturb and don't call me. betwwen us is over and over. and you have to learn to be without me, i will never be around for you.

 

DOES HE REALY MEANS THAT OR NOW HE IS JUST IN LOVE WITH THE GIRL, and eager to know her more so that he doesn't thind reasonable.It IS THERE'S FIRST MEETING.

 

this kills i can't imagine a person who is 3 Y with you, feels nothing right now. is that because i lost my brother and he doesn't want to share my sorrow. or he wants to start

 

a relationship with her.

[Tony T]

I know this is very difficult for you but you MUST listen to him and take him at his word.

 

Do not cry or beg for him to come back. The more you do this, the more unattractive you will be to him. Nobody likes for this to happen and it just makes you look pathetic.

 

I know this is so hard for you now but often in life many things happen at once. You must be strong and GET AWAY FROM THIS GUY.

 

Right now, you think you want him back. But in a month or two, you will begin to see how very wrong he is for you and that he is not worthy of even your time much less your love.

 

Follow my original advice...or you may get advice from others. But you MUST cease all contact with him, no matter how painful. Get together with friends, family and others. Keep yourself busy and stop obsessing with this relationship. He has insulted you, he has been very inconsiderate and extremely disrespectful. You don't need him for anything.

[dali]

Hi, Tony do you think he is not fare.

 

i mean, wenn mann start to like another girl, and knows he can't go right now to her because his ex-girl has problem.

 

i think this drives crazy, he is maybe eager to know her, maybe he thinks, she is the best, which can happen to him, and he is 30 right now. he was 27 wenn he met me. so i'm his first long relationship, so maybe now he wants to be free knowing someone else. and just be free, i lost my brother a week after,we break up.

 

so he was realy a nice guy, for the last 3y.

 

my question to you, shall i try to speak to him, wenn he comes back on sunday, so we can be back again.

[Tony T]

That's totally a decision YOU have to make.

 

From my view, I don't think he's the guy for you. But it may look different from where you are. Do what you feel right doing and be willing to accept the consequences.

 

I've already told you how I feel in my previous posts.