emotionsmessmeup Posted October 12, 2005 Share Posted October 12, 2005 I have a question for some of u... ok as simple as that... if there is a woman or a man who hang out with all the time...can have a conversation with...care for....and like to have sex with every week...and have been doing so for a year... what the hell stops u from a relationship? just a thought...what are everyones reasons? Link to post Share on other sites
basscatcher Posted October 12, 2005 Share Posted October 12, 2005 I think it is a relationship if neither of you are involved with anyone else; they just won't admit its a relationship. I have a friend who says to me "Don't use the word RELATIONSHIP, 'yuck"", he says "The word relationship has expectations to people and it puts rules and restictions on your partnership. There is a social standard to what a relationship is. A PARTNERSHIP, can grow, evolve, expand, and go is directions and places relationships cant because of the definition of it." If you really think about it you can understand where he is coming from. I personally still call a partnership a relationship!! I could not be a FWB. I recognized that I was in a FWB situation and I have been declining his attempts to get with me. I don't want that.. I want to invest my heart with someone. Link to post Share on other sites
LucreziaBorgia Posted October 12, 2005 Share Posted October 12, 2005 1. if there is a woman or a man who hang out with all the time...can have a conversation with...care for....and like to have sex with every week...and have been doing so for a year... 2. what the hell stops u from a relationship? 1. Pressure free, commitment free, hassle free sex with a friend that doesn't stop you from looking for a relationship with someone else. 2. See above. Why have a relationship with someone you don't want to commit to? It would be hard to find a relationship with the type of person you want more than a FWB with if you are having a relationship with your FWB. Link to post Share on other sites
Author emotionsmessmeup Posted October 12, 2005 Author Share Posted October 12, 2005 1. Pressure free, commitment free, hassle free sex with a friend that doesn't stop you from looking for a relationship with someone else. 2. See above. Why have a relationship with someone you don't want to commit to? It would be hard to find a relationship with the type of person you want more than a FWB with if you are having a relationship with your FWB. well....when u dont wanna commit why continue having sex.... why dont u wanna commit when there is chemistry, caring and the relationship is easy going...no jealousy...nothing. isnt that the basis of a perfect relationship in the first place? and then dont u always always want more. Link to post Share on other sites
LucreziaBorgia Posted October 13, 2005 Share Posted October 13, 2005 1. well....when u dont wanna commit why continue having sex.... 2. why dont u wanna commit when there is chemistry, caring and the relationship is easy going...no jealousy...nothing. isnt that the basis of a perfect relationship in the first place? 3. and then dont u always always want more. 1. When the sex was good but the person wasn't relationship material for me or I simply wanted to keep my options open - having great sex with someone under ideal circumstances didn't mean that I wanted to commit to them. 2. Because sometimes the chemistry, caring, easy going and no jealousy stuff simply wasn't enough to override the fact that they weren't relationship material for me. 3. No. I've been pretty careful not to mislead someone into thinking that the FWB is something that it is not, and made very sure that it was a mutual thing and not a case of someone wanting more than I can give. While I'm more on the 'bad guy' side of things these days, I can understand where you are coming from though - having been on that painful side of it in my younger years. Link to post Share on other sites
newbby Posted October 13, 2005 Share Posted October 13, 2005 according to some reading i did recently, men cannot see their fwb as a candidate for a serious relationship. once it is casual, it is pretty much permanently set in their minds as casual. i think it can be the same with women too. Link to post Share on other sites
anonymousgrl Posted October 14, 2005 Share Posted October 14, 2005 My boyfriend had a FWB shortly before we started dating and she still calls him every now and then. I'm still trying to figure out how he could screw around with her on and off for 6 months, take a couple of vacations with her, and then when he met someone else, he let her off easily. Just a few weeks after he met this other chic, the FWB broke them up and he went back to her. Luckily I met him 3 months after all this mess ended, but the tricky thing is that this ex-FWB still continues to call my boyfriend randomly even though he never answers or speaks to her. She also works with him, so this makes it challenging for him to say much to her about the random calls. The ex-FWB has calmed down a lot though, as when she first found out he was seeing someone else, she called CONSTANTLY. I used to work in the same office as both of them, so that just added to the drama of dealing with her. She is 4 years younger than him and 6 years younger than me, and very immature. There were a couple of instances when we ended up at the same bar/club with a group of people and she would be there and proceed to be touchy feely with him. He did NOT reciprocate, but I still got very annoyed. After seeing how she behaved around him 3 different times and she failed miserably and had no respect that he was in a serious relationship with me, I told him that he needed to stop communicating with her outside of work hours. The girl is out of control and very immature. She has only called 1-2 times in the last 4 months, but it happened again a few days ago, and this angered me, even though it is clearly not his fault. I'm just looking for insight from others on this topic. Link to post Share on other sites
Mary3 Posted October 15, 2005 Share Posted October 15, 2005 FWB * is * a form of a relationship. Only the rules are a little different than when in a committed monogamous relationship. Link to post Share on other sites
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