ironpony Posted September 19, 2020 Share Posted September 19, 2020 I feel like I keep failing in relalionships with women and I feel like maybe it's because I am autistic. I wonder maybe I should just stick to women who are as well, and not bother with non-autistic women, unless of course they approach me and all, but otherwise not bother to actually pursue any more that are not autistic as well. Or is this a bad idea, and it's just too limiting, and therefore not the answer? Link to post Share on other sites
CaliforniaGirl Posted September 19, 2020 Share Posted September 19, 2020 I don't know...have you dated any autistic women? How did it work out? Link to post Share on other sites
Author ironpony Posted September 19, 2020 Author Share Posted September 19, 2020 No I haven't before. Link to post Share on other sites
ExpatInItaly Posted September 19, 2020 Share Posted September 19, 2020 I would begin by getting a professional evaluation done, OP. Try to understand yourself more before you go about dating again. 3 Link to post Share on other sites
Author ironpony Posted September 19, 2020 Author Share Posted September 19, 2020 Oh okay, what kind of professional evaluation? Link to post Share on other sites
CaliforniaGirl Posted September 19, 2020 Share Posted September 19, 2020 2 hours ago, ironpony said: Oh okay, what kind of professional evaluation? You haven't been diagnosed autistic? I wouldn't self-diagnose, personally. A psychiatrist or neuropsych can diagnose you. 1 Link to post Share on other sites
alphamale Posted September 19, 2020 Share Posted September 19, 2020 5 hours ago, ironpony said: Oh okay, what kind of professional evaluation? that's where an evaluation is done by a professional Link to post Share on other sites
elaine567 Posted September 19, 2020 Share Posted September 19, 2020 ironpony is 36. I don't really think we should be questioning his autistic diagnosis. 2 Link to post Share on other sites
Wiseman2 Posted September 19, 2020 Share Posted September 19, 2020 7 hours ago, ironpony said: I feel like I keep failing in relalionships with women and I feel like maybe it's because I am autistic. I wonder maybe I should just stick to women who are as well, and not bother with non-autistic women, unless of course they approach me and all, but otherwise not bother to actually pursue any more that are not autistic as well. Or is this a bad idea, and it's just too limiting, and therefore not the answer? It's a bad idea to self diagnose . It's a bad idea to not see a neurologist. It's an even worse idea to post discriminatory posts. 2 Link to post Share on other sites
Author ironpony Posted September 19, 2020 Author Share Posted September 19, 2020 (edited) Oh I see what you mean. Yes I have been diagnosed with autism, twice in my life. The first time was as a kid, but I don't know if it was a neurologist that did it. The second time was by a psychologist though, unless I should see a neurologist, instead of relying on a psychologist's diagnosis? Edited September 19, 2020 by ironpony Link to post Share on other sites
alphamale Posted September 19, 2020 Share Posted September 19, 2020 23 minutes ago, ironpony said: Oh I see what you mean. Yes I have been diagnosed with autism, twice in my life. The first time was as a kid, but I don't know if it was a neurologist that did it. The second time was by a psychologist though, unless I should see a neurologist, instead of relying on a psychologist's diagnosis? some form of M.D. with a stellar reputation would be ideal Link to post Share on other sites
Author ironpony Posted September 19, 2020 Author Share Posted September 19, 2020 Oh okay, well even other people say they think I am who are not even doctors when I talk about it, so if other people are thinking I am, then wouldn't the doctors who have diagnosed me before likely have been right? 2 Link to post Share on other sites
CautiouslyOptimistic Posted September 19, 2020 Share Posted September 19, 2020 20 minutes ago, ironpony said: Oh okay, well even other people say they think I am who are not even doctors when I talk about it, so if other people are thinking I am, then wouldn't the doctors who have diagnosed me before likely have been right? I would assume since you've been told twice you are autistic by medical professionals, you are most likely autistic. I don't think a third opinion is necessary. How about giving it a try to date someone autistic. Is there a dating app for folks on the spectrum? Link to post Share on other sites
Ruby Slippers Posted September 19, 2020 Share Posted September 19, 2020 Try it and see how it goes. Link to post Share on other sites
Author ironpony Posted September 19, 2020 Author Share Posted September 19, 2020 Oh okay. Well it's just I haven't been able to find many on dating sites so far, but I can keep looking. Link to post Share on other sites
alphamale Posted September 19, 2020 Share Posted September 19, 2020 4 hours ago, ironpony said: Oh okay. Well it's just I haven't been able to find many on dating sites so far, but I can keep looking. go to the internet and find a group that specializes in autistic folks near you. Link to post Share on other sites
Watercolors Posted September 19, 2020 Share Posted September 19, 2020 (edited) Deleted. Edited September 19, 2020 by Watercolors Link to post Share on other sites
CaliforniaGirl Posted September 19, 2020 Share Posted September 19, 2020 7 hours ago, elaine567 said: ironpony is 36. I don't really think we should be questioning his autistic diagnosis. I thought he was the one who asked about how to get diagnosed. I was answering that. Link to post Share on other sites
CaliforniaGirl Posted September 19, 2020 Share Posted September 19, 2020 5 hours ago, ironpony said: Oh okay, well even other people say they think I am who are not even doctors when I talk about it, so if other people are thinking I am, then wouldn't the doctors who have diagnosed me before likely have been right? Just forget this part, if you've been diagnosed you've been diagnosed. If you want to go out with an autistic person then do. But you know as well as anyone that autistic people are as varied as neurotypical people. You do have autism as a common ground so it could be your starting off point. The rest is up to you guys. IMO it doesn't make much sense to decide ahead of time to exclusively date one category of people, though, especially never having dated anyone in that category, though not only for that reason. Slow down, just get to the date first. Link to post Share on other sites
ShyViolet Posted September 19, 2020 Share Posted September 19, 2020 You don't need to make an all-or-nothing decision now, like "from now on I'll only date autistic women". Just try dating an autistic woman and see how it goes. Maybe you'll have more in common and understand each other better. It doesn't necessarily mean you will ONLY date autistic women for the rest of your life. You will meet different people, some autistic and some not, and take it on a case-by-case basis. Link to post Share on other sites
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