Why is it that the act of reciting poetry to women as a means of flirting no longer popular?

[JosephTheDetroitLion]

   Reciting poetry to girls is how I got all of my dates since I started doing it. It's incredibly effective, and has a higher success-rate with my experience than using pick-up lines. People have been doing it for centuries and it certainly is quite romantic. I feel that 21st century dating is more about satisfying each others carnal desires than generating "true love," whatever you consider that to be. Of course, when you recite poetry to her, she should be preferably alone or her more annoying friends will probably interrupt and it can either be something you made up or memorized online. While reciting you should be confident, and body language means everything. I, personally, am not noticeably attractive and only a bit above average, but it works like a charm for me. The thing is, with reciting poetry, more often than not the girl will think about the words you have told her and be undoubtedly flattered, even if she doesn't find you attractive. I don't really know, I'm just venting here but I honestly don't understand why it isn't popular anymore. I mean, one could argue that they are "cheesy," but then again we have pick-up lines and those aren't much better. What are your thoughts, girls, would poetry work with you? Or have I just been incredibly lucky?

                                                                                       

Edited September 23, 2020 by JosephTheDetroitLion
Bad formatting

[Wiseman2]

Worked for Cyrano de Bergerac , go for it.

[LuckyM]

Really depends on which poems. Do you write them? That is more endearing even a limerick. I don't have the courage to recite poetry because a girl might think it is silly or not understand the meaning or think it is uncool and so corny. If she is taken or not interested in you then forget it. Robert Herrick wrote naughty poems in the Renaissance

[Ruby Slippers]

1 hour ago, JosephTheDetroitLion said:

I feel that 21st century dating is more about satisfying each others carnal desires than generating "true love," whatever you consider that to be.

Yes. But of course, fleeting pleasures... quickly flee. True love relationships and those that aspire to it are the ones we'll take comfort in on our death bed. As Rumi said, "To love is to know God."

I think a couple of choice lines of poetry could be delivered even today, if done well. I'm a romantic dreamer, so if delivered right it'd get me a little swoony for sure.

Edited September 23, 2020 by Ruby Slippers

[Chilli]

Depends on your country. But l haven't seen too many women genuinely truly sensitive enough to even bother with if that's any kind of world gauge , in the end so many are just as superficial as the next these days. But if l were meeting someone that was so special , l'd love to use poetry and l did, it wouldn't be for just anyone though.

Edited September 23, 2020 by Chilli

[Sunnyzwei1989]

Honestly if the right guy did this I would love it, it’s so romantic.
 

Me and an ex used to find song lyrics that we would exchange with each other and I loved it.  That was 30 years ago though.  And I did write a haiku for him that was about him and he loved it.  

[JosephTheDetroitLion]

2 hours ago, Chilli said:

But l haven't seen too many women genuinely truly sensitive enough to even bother with if that's any kind of world gauge , in the end so many are just as superficial as the next these days.

Agreed, and it's unfortunate. And of course I don't recite poetry to any girl that I find to be "attractive' it gets pretty obvious which type of girl will be receptive to this kind of flirtation device after a few encounters.

[mark clemson]

Be the trendsetter who brings it back. Mad p*ssy, my man...

[snowboy91]

8 hours ago, JosephTheDetroitLion said:

I mean, one could argue that they are "cheesy," but then again we have pick-up lines and those aren't much better.

And hardly anyone uses pickup lines anymore.

I don't think "true love" has to necessarily hinge on reciting poetry - I think some consider it a bit old fashioned and adds unnecessary structure to the dating process. But, of course, some enjoy the old fashioned approach.

Myself - I think a solid relationship is a lot more about a deep connection, shared values and experiences and enjoying time with each other (and of course attraction!).  Poetry doesn't really add a lot to much of that over the long term for most, unless both you and your partner are into poetry.

[CaliforniaGirl]

Because it sounds like you're trying to get laid.

 

[CaliforniaGirl]

10 hours ago, Wiseman2 said:

Worked for Cyrano de Bergerac , go for it.

Yes. That's because he was the star of a rom-com.

[Shining One]

The "right" guy doesn't need to do it because you're already interested and it's useless for the "wrong" guy because it won't accomplish anything.

If poetry produced positive results, it would be more common.

[Weezy1973]

If it’s working for you why not keep doing it. That being said, I get the impression that you’re using poetry instead of pick up lines. So using it to get dates, rather than reciting it to a woman you’re already in love with? If so, it’s somewhat less romantic, but again if it’s working for you, no need to change.

[Lotsgoingon]

Sure, I can see a woman being pleasantly surprised by someone reciting poetry to her. The novelty is pretty cool. 

On the other hand, I bet the women you are reciting poetry to are most likely women who would like you if you just talked to them.  I don't think poetry presses some button such that women who otherwise wouldn't be interested suddenly become interested in us. If poetry had the kind of power you're talking about--the power to seduce someone otherwise not interested--then men would be reciting poetry all day long.

Sounds like this works for you. And that's great. Lots of "moves" only work if we really feel comfortable with the move. And again, you're likely approaching people who are already predisposed to liking you. 

And just to be clear, human beings have been obsessed with sex since the time they arrived or evolved on this earth. The idea that people were more sincere or committed or less obsessed with sex in the past is just a fantasy each generation tries to create. My mother was a religious woman who taught an adult Sunday School from a pretty intellectual and open-minded perspective. I remember her preparing for a class on David in the Old Testament/Hebrew Bible. David was obsessed with women, obsessed with sex. He sent off to war the husband of a woman he wanted to sleep with.  Right there in an sacred text of two of the world's major religions.

My mother's lesson: men have always been obsessed with sex--of course some more than others . Otherwise the Biblical writers would not have included such a story. in the Bible. Actually I think these days my mother would update things and say that men and women have always been obsessed with sex.

 

[FMW]

I'll be the one who swims against the current here.

In theory, it sounds like a nice idea, very romantic.  I love to read poetry on my own and appreciate its beauty and emotion.

In reality, if a guy quoted poetry to me I would probably be put on guard.  I would either think he was just trying really hard to get laid (as CaliforniaGirl said), or that he was too intense and emotional for my comfort level.  I'm also put off by pickup lines.  I like a more subtle natural flow to things.  But that's me.  I'm sure I wouldn't be the kind of woman that a poetry reciting kind of guy would be interested in anyway.  

 

[lana-banana]

Poetry was used the exact same way pick-up lines were today. There's plenty of 16th-c literature and before featuring women who are tired of hearing the same old verses. Folks can put a romantic spin on it all they want, but it wasn't some grand or noble endeavor. Both parties involved knew what they were after. 

As to whether it would "work", only to the extent that it seemed sincere or authentic. If a guy recited a couple verses and I felt I saw myself in them, it'd be pretty cool. If I got the sense that he recited the same thing to every woman he met, I'd be bored. And if he only recited boring English poets I'd be bored out of my mind. A guy who reads you Rumi or Farid ud-Din is waaay cooler than a guy whose idea of poetry is limited to Shakespeare.

[Wiseman2]

Roses are red🌹

Violets are blue🌺

You are hot🔥

Can I do you? 😍

[JosephTheDetroitLion]

17 minutes ago, Wiseman2 said:

Roses are red🌹

Violets are blue🌺

You are hot🔥

Can I do you? 😍

Hybrid of poem and pick-up line lmaoooooooo, you might just be on to something!

[GorillaTheater]

If we were running

From cops, I'd run slower just

To look at your butt.

[Shining One]

1 hour ago, lana-banana said:

And if he only recited boring English poets I'd be bored out of my mind.

Now that you mentioned this, I did persuade a woman into bed with: Amor vincit omnia, et nos cedamus amori. In retrospect, I can't say for sure how much that line contributed to the result. She was Catholic and impressed by my knowledge of Latin.

[MsJayne]

I've always thought that spouting poetry in public is a bit like pulling your pants down on a train. Some people are mesmerised and impressed, but most look away in embarrassment. However, despite my anti-poetry stance, I can recite both 'The Owl & the Pussycat', and 'The Man From Snowy River' by heart.  Actually, now that I think about it, I may have forgotten a few stanzas of The Man   

[basil67]

I am one of those who, if the poem was romantic, would look away in embarrassment. 

I love The Owl and the Pussycat.   I can only remember some lines from The Man, but if someone started reciting Jabberwocky, he would get a very positive reaction from me.   And thanks to your suggestion, I'm now going the hole up inside, away from the wind and pollen and will knit while watching The Man from Snowy River.   

[Mystery4u]

For my LDR girlfriend's birthday I wrote her a poem myself, about her and my feelings about her. She absolutely loved it and showed it to all her family and even posted it on FB.

It's not something to do with someone just to flirt, but when you are in a committed relationship, and the effort is worth it.

[Caauug]

Interesting subject…. I am hopeless at memorizing anything!!! Like I had to have a second crack at my wedding vows back in the day....

Anyway, a small poem I remember from 30yrs ago? I look it up... "Reflections on ice breaking" by Odgen Nash. What's it about? What OP is talking about. Why did I ever remember this??? I can't ever see it working as a pick up line....

 

[gaius]

Poetry is an outdated medium, like silent films. But so many men have no clue how to express their lust and desire for a woman in creative form that a lot of the ladies will sit there and actually listen to some guy drone on in old english. Anything is better than nothing. 

Now if you can find a way to channel those primal desires into a more modern form of communication, a powerful tool to win over the woman of your dreams you will have.