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I don't know if he has cheated on me


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3 hours ago, kendahke said:

not on instagram.... they are death about that sort of thing.

Sounds like you're talking about crotch shots, not raw shots of the vj-j.

Of course not raw shots, all pictures on underwear but I would sau these are typical pictures someone would send to initate sexting 

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I haven't talked to the guy yesterday and today he has posted a quote on story "sometimes is better to not have someone part of your life anymore, even if you miss this person" and he has typed "it doesn't matter if you miss this person" 

It hurts. He brings the problems and tries to appear ungulty... 

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45 minutes ago, Veronica73 said:

How immature and passive aggressive. 

I don't know why is so hard to give up on him. I mean I love him, but I am kind of losing respect for him based on his behaviour. 

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1 hour ago, migi said:

I don't know why is so hard to give up on him. I mean I love him, but I am kind of losing respect for him based on his behaviour. 

Losing respect for him? [shakes head in derision]   You appear to have little respect for yourself.  You need to chose you.  Stop choosing him to your detriment. 

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You were right. He is not a relationship material. He called me and he was angry. He was videocalling to show me that he doesn't care for me and he was throwing away all presents I have given him. And that was offensive how he threw them on the trash. They were not much or expensive, but that was all I had and I have done them with love. He was yelling at me and insulting me, telling that I am a bitch and a whore and not thankful. Saying that I destroyed the relatioship. He was threatening that he would come to me and kill me so my mom sees me dead when she comes home and he doesn't care for the police. He told me that he regrets falling in love with me and the time he wasted with me. He told me that I never loved him and he knew from the begining that I would make his life terrible. He said that he doesn't care if I die or whatever happens to me. That I was a bad person and slut. He considered me his wife but I wasn't wife material because I was a slut 

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Just now, migi said:

You were right. He is not a relationship material. He called me and he was angry. He was videocalling to show me that he doesn't care for me and he was throwing away all presents I have given him. 

Don't even entertain his abuse. Delete and block him and all his people from all your messaging apps and social media. Don't let him train you like a fearful dog. Stop complaining about how bad he treats you as if it's a badge of honor, just end it.

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On 9/26/2020 at 11:40 AM, migi said:

He is threatening me. I am telling him that I am sick today and I can't talk right now but we have to meet. He is threatening to talk right now because he doesn't even want to see me. I don't know what to do. I am frightened 

If he doesn't even want to see you what are you frightened of, his immature threats?  If you are sick why would you want to meet with him?  Just talk to him and get it over with and be done with him.  He's a psycho.  After threatening to kill you I hope you have better sense than to get back with this nut.

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1 minute ago, stillafool said:

If he doesn't even want to see you what are you frightened of?  Just talk to him and get it over with and be done with him.

Because he said he doesn't care for me anymore and doesn't want to see me or hear anything from me but kept calling me and was threatening me to come to me and make me feel the way I made him feel.. 
It was something I should have ended before when I saw the first red flags but I loved him and kept hoping that things would change. I had a lot to say all the time through out our relationship but didn't have the courrage because I was afraid that he would get angry and agressive and I didn't want to fight. I was the one who always asked for forgiveness even though I didn't know what I did wrong. When I asked him what was I doing wrong, he used to get angry, so most of the time I asked for forgiveness without even knowing why should I ask for that. I am so broken and hurt, mostly because I was hearing that stuff from someone I loved with all my heart...

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Btw he texted me and told me that he can't end things from phone because I destroyed him, so we have to meet. It is not me asking to meet him, it's him that expect me to make everything work again (as I have always done), while he is telling and doing what he wants with me.. 

It was the first time I was accepting to break up with him, what he actually asked for and still he kept calling

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Please do not go and meet this man.
The most dangerous time for women with abusive partners is when they tell him they want to leave.
He may feel like he has lost control over you – and he may resort to more extreme measures to regain that control, so do not take any chances.
 

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5 minutes ago, elaine567 said:

Please do not go and meet this man.
The most dangerous time for women with abusive partners is when they tell him they want to leave.
He may feel like he has lost control over you – and he may resort to more extreme measures to regain that control, so do not take any chances.
 

Should I tell him I don't want to meet him? Or block him? Because I think he would get really agressive if I block him and it might get more extreme, even if I tell him we can't meet. 

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Just be stern with him (over the phone) that it's over because the relationship is too volatile, not what you want.  Warn him that if he comes over you will consider it a threat and call the Police.  Wish him well and hang up, block and delete.  I

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1 minute ago, stillafool said:

Just be stern with him (over the phone) that it's over because the relationship is too volatile, not what you want.  Warn him that if he comes over you will consider it a threat and call the Police.  Wish him well and hang up, block and delete.  I

He said he doesn't care if I call the police. I didn't even said that, he mentionet the police himself

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20 minutes ago, migi said:

He said he doesn't care if I call the police. I didn't even said that, he mentionet the police himself

Tell him "Good, then you and the Police can work it out outside because I'm staying behind locked doors."  Be firm with him.

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mark clemson
6 hours ago, migi said:

 but I wasn't wife material

Irony, coming from him.

You might consider filing a police report (about his threat to kill you so your mom would see you dead). They probably won't do much except record it, but it might be wise to have something on file so if he escalates, their case is already started. You might also consider researching and contacting local resources for abused women, explain what's going on, and have their resources available, their phone numbers in your phone, etc. Would probably be wise. They may be able to give advice specific to your jurisdiction on how to keep him out of your hair as much as possible.

Clearly this guy is bad news and you should act accordingly. He may stick to verbal stuff OR he MAY escalate to physical. You would not be the first woman who "thought she could handle" an abusive Ex and you won't be the last.

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Why did you even take his video call? Here's what you need to do, in this order:

Text him and say you won't meet and to leave you alone. 

File a police report.

Block him.

 

If you speak to him again after all he's said to you and all the threats, it's ALL on you. 

 

 

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22 hours ago, migi said:

Btw he texted me and told me that he can't end things from phone because I destroyed him, so we have to meet. It is not me asking to meet him, it's him that expect me to make everything work again (as I have always done), while he is telling and doing what he wants with me.. 

It was the first time I was accepting to break up with him, what he actually asked for and still he kept calling

It's time to block him.  Do not go meet with him without a guy who can kick his behind if he tries anything on you.

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On 10/2/2020 at 6:08 PM, stillafool said:

I'll bet anything she met with him anyway.

Actually I didn't. But I am broken. All memories when we met and started dating, all happy moments come back and make everything worse. I know we have had hard moments too, fights etc, but still they aren't enough to feel good. It seems like a part is missing while you don't get those text messages and calls as you used to. And I can't talk to anyone. My parents didn't know and I don't want to talk right now with my friend. She is on vacation and we will probably meet in a month but I don't want to talk with her on the phone. It is so hard to be with people and try to keep tears inside so you don't be noticed. It hurts 

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I'm sorry breaking up is hard but sometimes for the best.  It takes time to detach because of the habits like receiving texts, etc.  Keep busy and the days will pass faster.  Stay off of social media if you can.  (((Hugs))))

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48 minutes ago, stillafool said:

I'm sorry breaking up is hard but sometimes for the best.  It takes time to detach because of the habits like receiving texts, etc.  Keep busy and the days will pass faster.  Stay off of social media if you can.  (((Hugs))))

His mother and his sister keep texting me to ask if I am better (as I was sick) and it looks like they don't know anything about the break up. Everything seems harder. How can I forget him and recover while I keep contact with his family! 

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You can't.  You have to tell his family.  Send a brief text:  

Thank you for you well wishes.  Sadly it appears that [BF] didn't tell you that we broke up.  It was nice knowing you but I cannot in good conscious stay connected with you after the end of my relationship with your [son / brother].  Take care.  

Hopefully they will go away now. 

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