Yinyangblondie Posted September 28, 2020 Share Posted September 28, 2020 Long story short, I found an unused nipple tassel in his car. When I asked him about it, he insists he doesn’t know where it came from. No one drives his car or anything, the only time his friend borrowed his car a few weeks ago. He’s had the car cleaned since then. I found it on the floor in the back seat. I want to trust him but I’m having doubts. He basically just said he has no idea and made it seem like no big deal like I’m just supposed to forget about it. I’m so conflicted Bc I feel like I trust him but it just doesn’t make any sense logically. What would you do? Link to post Share on other sites
Guildford Posted September 28, 2020 Share Posted September 28, 2020 If the nipple tassel (whatever that is) is the only evidence that you have, then I would not spend a lot of time worrying about it. However, keep your eyes open in the future. Link to post Share on other sites
schlumpy Posted September 28, 2020 Share Posted September 28, 2020 He made a mistake and now your radar is up and running. He will probably go out of his way to be Helpful and loving for a while or until he thinks he's smoothed things over. Then it will back to business. Don't mention it anymore. Keep your eyes open and start digging. Never confront unless you have overwhelming evidence because the ability of cheaters to lie and use your own feelings against you is legendary. He woke you up. Don't lose that advantage. 4 Link to post Share on other sites
smackie9 Posted September 28, 2020 Share Posted September 28, 2020 Most likely it was his buddy. Cars do have this thing that no matter how well you think you have cleaned the car, things pop out like McDonalds french fries, loose change, earbuds, etc. Was it on the passenger side? That tassel was probably dropped on the seat, then it made it's way between the seat and the back of the seat, to the floor behind just from sitting on it repeatedly, or it was under the front seat and it got pushed out from vacuuming. I'm sure he's gonna have a little chat about it to his friend, and give him $%^& for it. 2 Link to post Share on other sites
Wiseman2 Posted September 28, 2020 Share Posted September 28, 2020 3 hours ago, Yinyangblondie said: I found an unused nipple tassel in his car. Maybe he goes to strip clubs with his friends. How long have you been dating? How old is he? 1 Link to post Share on other sites
CautiouslyOptimistic Posted September 28, 2020 Share Posted September 28, 2020 A nipple tassle is a super weird thing to find in your car and have no clue where it came from lol. He knows. But that won't stop him from making YOU sound and feel like the crazy one. 2 Link to post Share on other sites
Wiseman2 Posted September 28, 2020 Share Posted September 28, 2020 2 minutes ago, CautiouslyOptimistic said: A nipple tassle is a super weird thing to find in your car and have no clue where it came from lol. Maybe he had his sunroof/top open when a bird flew by with it in it's beak and happen to drop it? 🚗🕊🎉 3 Link to post Share on other sites
d0nnivain Posted September 28, 2020 Share Posted September 28, 2020 4 hours ago, Yinyangblondie said: I found an unused nipple tassel in his car. The unused is the part that perplexes me. First how do you know? Second aren't they sold in pairs so if you found one unused one wouldn't you have found both? Do you actually know how long it was there? It seems suspicious. I could probably get past it if that is the only thing making you suspicious but I would have my radar up. I couldn't be with somebody who previously had sex with somebody in the sex industry. I'd be too afraid of catching something. 1 Link to post Share on other sites
ExpatInItaly Posted September 28, 2020 Share Posted September 28, 2020 Indeed a very weird item to show up unnoticed in one's car. How has your relationship been up until this point, OP? Have you ever seen any other red flags? Link to post Share on other sites
Wiseman2 Posted September 28, 2020 Share Posted September 28, 2020 29 minutes ago, ExpatInItaly said: Indeed a very weird item to show up unnoticed in one's car. It happens all the time. But the real mystery is: Where is the other one? 🤔 2 Link to post Share on other sites
mark clemson Posted September 28, 2020 Share Posted September 28, 2020 Consider asking him if he has any fetishes he'd like to talk to you about. At this point, IMO this is a YELLOW (not red) flag. A big one, but yellow. I agree with the advice to keep your eyes open, in case there's more to this. 1 Link to post Share on other sites
elaine567 Posted September 28, 2020 Share Posted September 28, 2020 (edited) My guess he had a stripper/exotic dancer/sex worker or his other woman in his car. She had the unused tassels in her bag or her pocket and one of them dropped out into the footwell of the back seat. He had likely no idea it was there until the OP found it. It occurred after the buddy used the car and the car was cleaned, so in the last ~2 weeks... 6 hours ago, Yinyangblondie said: He basically just said he has no idea and made it seem like no big deal like I’m just supposed to forget about it. He is lying and trying to confuse you... NO-ONE will forget about something like that... Edited September 28, 2020 by elaine567 Link to post Share on other sites
DarrenB Posted September 28, 2020 Share Posted September 28, 2020 Maybe he's got a secret fetish, maybe he hoards kinky sh*t, maybe he's got someone on the side, maybe he's a secret lapdancer. The point is, you'll never know the truth if you remain suspect about it. Stay aware but don't overthink it - if there's any further signs, then you'll know. Link to post Share on other sites
MsJayne Posted September 28, 2020 Share Posted September 28, 2020 Without any background it's hard to put into context, but I'd be looking to the friend who borrowed his car. Your guys reaction to it was very casual and dismissive, which is how I would expect an innocent guy to act. How often does the inside of the car get a clean? Did he clean it just after the friend borrowed it? Because if he did I'm guessing the friend got some action in the car, and accordingly your man gave it a once-over but missed the tassel under the seat. Somewhere out there is a lady of the night dressed in fishnets, mini skirt, and one nipple tassel. 1 Link to post Share on other sites
CautiouslyOptimistic Posted September 28, 2020 Share Posted September 28, 2020 19 minutes ago, MsJayne said: Without any background it's hard to put into context, but I'd be looking to the friend who borrowed his car. Your guys reaction to it was very casual and dismissive, which is how I would expect an innocent guy to act. How often does the inside of the car get a clean? Did he clean it just after the friend borrowed it? Because if he did I'm guessing the friend got some action in the car, and accordingly your man gave it a once-over but missed the tassel under the seat. Somewhere out there is a lady of the night dressed in fishnets, mini skirt, and one nipple tassel. A normal reaction would probably be, "WTF was my friend doing in my car and with whom???" Not "It's no big deal....you're crazy.....forget about it...." 5 Link to post Share on other sites
CautiouslyOptimistic Posted September 28, 2020 Share Posted September 28, 2020 3 hours ago, Wiseman2 said: Maybe he had his sunroof/top open when a bird flew by with it in it's beak and happen to drop it? 🚗🕊🎉 Seems legit. 1 Link to post Share on other sites
La.Primavera Posted September 28, 2020 Share Posted September 28, 2020 I would dump him. His excuse is weak and my trust would be completely gone. I'd also get an STI test. Life is too short to spend confused and mistrustful of your partner. You won't have issues like this with decent guys. 3 Link to post Share on other sites
elaine567 Posted September 28, 2020 Share Posted September 28, 2020 8 minutes ago, MsJayne said: Your guys reaction to it was very casual and dismissive, which is how I would expect an innocent guy to act NO, that is not the reaction of an innocent guy. He was lying through his teeth and trying to put her off the scent... 1 Link to post Share on other sites
ajequals Posted September 28, 2020 Share Posted September 28, 2020 (edited) Speaking from the stand point of being to a strip club or two. not many artist. use such a device in my area. Maybe it's different in yours. , let me ask, would you be upset if he did go to a strip club with his friends? My girl knew so I never got in trouble Edited September 28, 2020 by ajequals Link to post Share on other sites
CautiouslyOptimistic Posted September 28, 2020 Share Posted September 28, 2020 4 minutes ago, ajequals said: Speaking from the stand point of being to a strip club or two. not many artist. use such a device in my area. Maybe it's different in yours. , let me ask, would you be upset if he did go to a strip club with his friends? My girl knew so I never got in trouble I've never been to a strip club, but I have been watching Mad Men again lately and was just about to ask if maybe this car is actually a time machine! Link to post Share on other sites
GorillaTheater Posted September 28, 2020 Share Posted September 28, 2020 36 minutes ago, CautiouslyOptimistic said: I've never been to a strip club, but I have been watching Mad Men again lately and was just about to ask if maybe this car is actually a time machine! Seriously, have nipple tassels been a thing since 50s stag movies? 2 Link to post Share on other sites
basil67 Posted September 28, 2020 Share Posted September 28, 2020 3 minutes ago, GorillaTheater said: Seriously, have nipple tassels been a thing since 50s stag movies? They are popular in burlesque and also Mardi Gras. Not seedy strip clubs though. 1 Link to post Share on other sites
Wiseman2 Posted September 28, 2020 Share Posted September 28, 2020 On 8/24/2020 at 9:26 AM, Yinyangblondie said: my bf is friends with his ex’s mom. They had a death in the family n my bf went to see the mom n stayed the night there. She also plans to come stay at my bfs house in a few weeks because she’s in town & it’s a convenient place to stay. Could it be his gf's or the mother's or somewhere he went while hanging out with the ex and her mother? Link to post Share on other sites
Allupinnit Posted September 28, 2020 Share Posted September 28, 2020 If there's a nipple tassel in someone's car the owner knows EXACTLY where it came from. 3 Link to post Share on other sites
major_merrick Posted September 28, 2020 Share Posted September 28, 2020 I'm with GorillaTheater on this one. Who actually uses nipple tassels? Just strange. I mean, I've been to a bunch of strip clubs over the years and I've never seen them. And strippers and working girls are different. Sometimes there's overlap, but different. If I found a nipple tassel in my husband's car, my reaction would be to wonder what strange prank or gag was going on. I would never in my life consider it seriously. If the guy is lying, it is due to embarrassment rather than cheating. And....how exactly does one know what that a nipple tassel is "unused?" And is a used one better or worse than an unused one, in your opinion? 2 Link to post Share on other sites
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