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I feel so guilty and disgusted with myself.


introuble2020

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5 hours ago, Rainydayz22 said:

I would like to tell my sister who I’m very close to but I don’t fully trust she wouldn’t tell anyone. I think she would tell her husband. 

What is BS and WS? When you say you blocked him for a time, did you then unblock? 

I’m so sorry to hear that your MM ended his own life. How awful for everyone involved 😞Did he already have mental health issues?
 

Sorry for the acronyms. A BS is a betrayed spouse and a WS is a wayward spouse.

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19 hours ago, DKT3 said:

I don't get the feeling that you actually feel guilty about cheating on your boyfriend,  it appears that your guilty is more selfish,  more about you coming to realize that he isn't really what you thought he was.  

I kinda agree with this.  You don't really love your bf and since you aren't married with kids why not break up and free him to find someone who really loves him.  Please don't say that you do because if you did there is no way you would carry on this affair right under his nose with a mutual friend.  You have totally disrespected your hopefully soon to be ex boyfriend.

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8 hours ago, Rainydayz22 said:

I’m so sorry to hear that your MM ended his own life. How awful for everyone involved 😞Did he already have mental health issues?

Yes, he'd had serious depression for a long time.  There were a lot of problems in their family and I think his wife may have been at the core of it, and he was carrying a lot of repressed anger. I think that was why he'd sought out other company, an escape from a chaotic home life where he had no control over anything. 

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