Mystery4u Posted October 6, 2020 Share Posted October 6, 2020 8 minutes ago, askls said: I understand that haha. I guess I'd just rather him know. I just like to put it all out there, but I know that isn't good. It doesn't matter how you feel about him - he does not feel the same about you. He has made it clear he does not want to be in a relationship with you. Stop thinking you did something wrong. There is no such thing as being 'too clingy' when interest levels match. Yours did not match. He does not care about you, or deserve to have you in his life. Delete, block and move on. 1 Link to post Share on other sites
stillafool Posted October 6, 2020 Share Posted October 6, 2020 2 hours ago, askls said: Does it sound like the way I am would logically drive someone insane to you? No, because a man who actually wanted to be with you would welcome your attention. This guy doesn't feel that way about you and probably never will. How old are you and him? 1 Link to post Share on other sites
Author askls Posted October 6, 2020 Author Share Posted October 6, 2020 1 minute ago, stillafool said: No, because a man who actually wanted to be with you would welcome your attention. This guy doesn't feel that way about you and probably never will. How old are you and him? I'm 24 and he's 30. It started when I was 19 and he was 25. Link to post Share on other sites
stillafool Posted October 6, 2020 Share Posted October 6, 2020 Well you're at the age where your life is really just starting so put this in your rear view honey, you're getting ready to have the time of your life. Don't mourn the loss of this guy because soon you will see you can do so much better. As soon as this damn virus is over.😊 2 Link to post Share on other sites
snowboy91 Posted October 6, 2020 Share Posted October 6, 2020 22 hours ago, askls said: After he sent me the final text, I told him I love him and if I could choose any one in the world to be with, I'd still choose him. I also said that at the same time I can't allow myself to keep being hurt if he is never going to love and respect me back. I genuinely feel these things after knowing him so long (about 4.5 years), but I'm afraid he won't believe it. I notice how your response is all about how you feel about him. Try and think more about the signs he's showing you as to whether he wants to be in a relationship with you. It seems that he thinks he's not in a good place emotionally to be in a relationship with anyone at the moment, and isn't feeling the way for you that you feel for him. This is all about him and not a reflection on you at all. I don't think you're being needy at all - everything you were doing would have been fine with any other guy that was really into you. Just not with him, for reasons that aren't your fault. Link to post Share on other sites
Author askls Posted October 8, 2020 Author Share Posted October 8, 2020 On 10/6/2020 at 5:35 PM, snowboy91 said: I notice how your response is all about how you feel about him. Try and think more about the signs he's showing you as to whether he wants to be in a relationship with you. It seems that he thinks he's not in a good place emotionally to be in a relationship with anyone at the moment, and isn't feeling the way for you that you feel for him. This is all about him and not a reflection on you at all. I don't think you're being needy at all - everything you were doing would have been fine with any other guy that was really into you. Just not with him, for reasons that aren't your fault. I appreciate your help. 1 Link to post Share on other sites
spiderowl Posted October 11, 2020 Share Posted October 11, 2020 You haven’t done anything wrong. You have been genuine with him. You have nothing to blame yourself for. He mentioned someone in the past. This may be an excuse on his part but it may also mean that he’s still stuck on her. If that is the case, he will stay emotionally ‘remote’ to you. As others have said, you can do so much better. You have let him have control of the situation and he does not deserve your love and attention. Do not go to see him when he wants you to - be busy elsewhere. Restrict any time he can spend with you. This is how he treats you and you need to make yourself less obtainable to him. Once he realises you are not waiting on his texts and at his beck and call, but actually have a life of your own that you are busy with, he will learn to value time with you more or give up because he knows his heart is not in it. How would you like a guy to treat you? once you have worked that out, then opt out if they don’t treat you like that. Being alone for a while is better than putting up with casual sex and not much else. It is surprising how rejecting poor treatment can have a positive effect as others realise you are worthy of attention and respect. Link to post Share on other sites
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