I think my new job is depressing me

[ShiningMoon]

Hi all,

Hope everyone is keeping safe! I'm going to try to keep this concise & to the point.

I worked in a client-facing banking role for three years (incredibly dynamic, business trips, projects etc..) then transitioned into a Big4 role which was not a fit for me despite the amazing environment. The job was simply below my competences. I therefore left after a year and a half to transition back into banking, but non-client facing this time.

I made the transition during the lockdown and it's been a huge adjustment. I went from an environment where I was constantly in calls & conferences, to one where people barely collaborate and I spend my days on the same excel spreadsheet. The role is interesting, but I'm feeling more and more isolated, therefore losing my personality. I'm a vibrant individual, but I've turned into a complete recluse since starting this job. The manager doesn't do catch-ups or team meetings either. I could go an entire week without talking to anybody. The onboarding has been questionable as well (no training, had to request my own accesses, no formal presentation).

In addition to the above, my workload has been minimal. They hired me with 6 years experience, but every single time I requested to work on a project, the response is: "we'll take this onboard" then a few days later: "it's been assigned to someone else". They're overwhelming someone who was hired at the same time with 3 years experience who was teaching me how to escalate a matter (really?). He gets all the projects I've asked to work on. My performance is not the issue since they keep telling me I'm doing really well, but I've got nothing to show really. The projects they assigned me are of administrative nature more so.

I feel as though there is a bit of politics in terms of work assignment and since we're not in the office, they can do as they please. The other hire will have plenty of projects to show for their 6 months review, whereas I'll have none aside from the analytical support I've been providing. In addition to the isolation, I feel as though they're delaying my progression purposefully.

I feel so stifled and as though I'm only the shadow of myself. I can't stop crying each day.

Any advice would be greatly appreciated.

[lee179108]

Some ways of taking this...  im not sure what kind of cluture/environment you're in but heres what you could do:

1. Everything you've said here raise it to a manager and explain how its making you feel and what you would like to feel better.  If the manager doesnt listen then take it higher, but beware this could annoy them.  

2. Leave it, say nothing and let it ride for now since theyve said you're doing well..  if they say that then why should you worry about whats said in you're review?  

3. Write down the dates and keep a diary of everything that goes on and is said to you by people when youve escalated this. That way you have proof if you ever wanted to raise this matter. I wouldnt show this to a manger though, only show if it gets escalated to a level where theres some sort of dispute. 

4. Keep Looking for another job where you wont have this problem. 

[Ellener]

Life is really difficult right now @ShiningMoon It's just a matter of getting through the days in grim times. Remind yourself 'it's just a job' and not forever.

Find other creative and social outlets aside from work. Look after yourself with good diet, exercise, relaxation and sleep. 

[Wiseman2]

Sorry to hear that. It sounds like working from home is getting to you.

Keep in mind your employer is not responsible for your feelings. That's for therapists.

Developing lists of greivence and a diary of injustice collecting is not only nonproductive, it deepens your sense of isolation, dissatisfaction and helplessness.

What you can do is get an excellent profile on LinkedIn with a good professional headshot, a summary of your education, experience, professional associations, etc.

Upload your phone and email contact lists and see who you can "connect" to.

Also contact alumni, former colleagues,etc  for connections.

When you are ready start sending out resumes to appropriate jobs. 

 

[FMW]

On 10/14/2020 at 6:17 AM, ShiningMoon said:

I feel as though they're delaying my progression purposefully.

What do you think would be the motivation for that?

Continue voicing your desire to work on particular projects.  When the opportunity arises in conversations with your manager, let them know you feel  you could be doing more. 

If you work for a larger financial organization, take any opportunity offered by your employer that comes along to participate and connect with coworkers (phone conferences, Zoom meetings, whatever options are available), even if they are not mandatory for your position or initiated by your manager.  That can help you feel more involved and motivated, and maybe connect you with others who might at some point be able to offer you another position within the organization.  

    

    

[d0nnivain]

Shining Moon, 

What is your gender?  If you are a woman with 6 years experience but the company keeps assigning work to a junior man, you may be the victim of sexual discrimination.  

That said, it sounds like you are extrovert -- meaning you are energized by being around people.  You are withering through covid without people to engage with.  

You may need to find new outlets & not rely on your job for socialization.  I joined an on line book club & once per month have a Zoom party with my friends.  It really does help beat the isolation blues.