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Taking a poll, flirting or innocent banter?


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Scenario: Persons A and B are a married couple. Persons Y and Z are a married couple. Z has been helping AB (and the third person C) work on a political campaign for the last 8 months. Y knows AB, but not particularly well, just acquaintances. Z would call them more than acquaintances, but not close friends. Below is a transcript of text messages between A and Z (male and female). Give me your thoughts and answers in the poll.

 

Situation 1, A, Z, C were supposed to celebrate a primary victory. C was called into work, so A and Z sat at a bar had some drinks and was out late C never showed. These texts were exchanged between A and Z the following day(s)

A: Thank you for a fun night. I loved it

Z: How in the hell are you up?? I'm still drunk!!! It was a fun night...very much indeed!

A: I am too. We are headed shopping. I couldn't sleep. Yes, it was much needed, How much trouble are you in?

Z: None!! He's glad we had a good time. You? (which is wrong btw, he wasn't very happy just hid it well)

A: Everything good here. We will have to do it again. BTW. You smelled really good

Z: Yes! And thanks! Not even in trouble with C? my daugher is chewing my butt right now, says my curfew is 130a from here on. Guess we'll just have to start earlier next time ;-)

A: Yes we will have to start earlier. I'm ready again whenever you are. I'll make sure to have you home by 130 lol ;-P And you are welcome. You looked good and smelled great. heart eye emoji

Z: heart face emoji. You still up?

Z: Guess not. Talk to you later!

Next day

A: Good morning. Thank you so much for this! (inspirational meme). I hope you have a great day. Are you doing OK?

Z: I am! Promise! heart eye emoji

Z: It's raining...I may have to fall back to sleep...:-P

A: I wish I could. I'm sitting in civil court. Be a great day to watch movies..heart face emoji

Z: And cuddle.... ;-)

A: Yes. I would love to cuddle. blowing kiss emoji

some drama at A's work happens

Z: It'll be over soon. Keep the faith.

A: yes it will. Plus I have you in my corner

Z: 100%

A: thank you dear

Z: blowing kiss emoji

A: blowing kiss emoji

Z: I'm gonna go tan real quick. I'll message you back in a bit, ok?

A: ok. thanks for the visual. lol

Z: BTW whats you snap(chat). May want to move to that... ;-) ;-)

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Datingdisabled

Flirting and an affair most likely since their moving to snap chat 

Edited by Datingdisabled
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SincereOnlineGuy

 

NOT innocent banter...    (but I wish it could be plotted on a graph relating to the timeline of them having been alone together away from campaigning (or not).

 

I mean, If this is just getting off the ground (despite the mentioned several Covid months)... then (your partner) could save herself by fessing-up, and drawing a line, and ceasing everything.

 

BUT if they are already in deep,  then it probably supports that being enough of a narrative to know that drastic measures are needed.

 

 

Edited by SincereOnlineGuy
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A and Z are a thing.  It's more than flirting, its sexual, loving banter between two people that likely are getting physical with each other.  At least in my life experience.

Moving to snapchat helps make sure there is no record.

I made no attempt to follow the algebra of A, B, C Y and Z.

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major_merrick

Definitely flirty, likely an affair in the making.  This is shaping up to be one of those "married, but not to each other" kind of situations.  I'm guessing you're "Y" in this picture.  If so, I'd be plotting a way to break them up ASAP, plotting a revenge affair, and probably hiding assets in case the worst happens. 

And I'm guessing that moving to SnapChat helps to hide records, or perhaps let them send pics/videos/livestream?  This is getting serious in a hurry.  Probably not physical yet, but it won't be more than a month or two. 

Back in my "playing around" days, I found that young, married, urban/suburban, upwardly-mobile professional women were super easy to get in bed.  Like they had very little loyalty (if any) to their husbands beyond sharing the same living situation.  A few drinks and some laughs and even the "straight" ones were about as sexually flexible as a rubber band.

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CautiouslyOptimistic
38 minutes ago, elaine567 said:

I am guessing you are Y...

I think OP is Z.

 

Not at all innocent.  Stop now before you blow many lives up.

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1 hour ago, Howlett23 said:

Below is a transcript of text messages between A and Z (male and female).

How are you getting access to her phone?

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"you smelled really good"?   Umm, yeah.  That's not something that platonic acquaintances say to each other.  You already know this is flirting.

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At minimum this is on the slippery slope from flirting to an affair. It's not 100% that it is already an affair, but I think it's clear there's a distinct possibility of that. Don't be in denial about this or let one of them try to tell you differently. Sorry.

Edited by mark clemson
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I think this should be moved to the infidelity forum. This emotional intimacy is happening in secret because they know the spouses would not approve (for obvious reasons!). That is betrayal. If it hasn't already, it will quickly become physical.

Edited by Zona
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Are you Y or B? How did you get into the Z or A's phone to view this text chat? Have you been suspicious of your spouse? 

 

You don't need a poll, you need to admit you went through the phone and confront what you think is inappropriate or an affair. 

Edited by Wiseman2
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It's gotta be Y. The avatar looks like something a guy would use.

If it is Y posting, you better put your foot down hard. No pussy footing around, or she will lose respect for you and just continue down her path of destruction. Often times people get gripped by fear and think they can head off or end the affair by being super nice and loving (pick me dance). That never works. You need to tell her that you are not comfortable with the level of emotional intimacy she is sharing with another man. She will probably whine and complain about you being controlling and say they are just friends. Stay firm, he goes or the marriage ends.

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21 hours ago, Howlett23 said:

Persons Y and Z are a married couple.

Z: None!! He's glad we had a good time. You? (which is wrong btw, he wasn't very happy just hid it well)

Do Z and A work together? You'll have to tell your wife you went through her phone and explain that it's inappropriate.

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The specific category is irrelevant (banter, flirting, other).

In the kind of relationship I would accept to be in, I would call it stepping out of expected exclusivity. As it is, no matter the intentions and neither if may lead to more, as enough in itself.

 

Edited by Uruktopi
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  • 3 weeks later...

 

How long married?  How old are you guys?   Any kids?

It's more than harmless flirting - they've reached an agreement to take the relationship secret via snap chat.

Is my understanding correct that your wife took the iniative and suggested moving their texts to snap chat?

If so, she has experience and this may not be her first affair. 

 

 

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Cookiesandough

A almost certainly sent a snap of his D to Z 

Edited by Shortskirtslonglashes
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