mejustme Posted November 6, 2020 Share Posted November 6, 2020 My ex boyfriend broke no contact and I gave in; I responded. I know that I shouldn’t have, but I miss him. I really freaking do! I was hopeful. I sat with tears rolling down my cheeks and listened to him tell me all about how he misses me so much, how he misses my touch, that i was the one. He broke up our last trip together as it was the same weekend this time last year, and all I could do was cry! I’ve wanted to hear this for 9 long month. He kept talking about what we did in the past and how he misses it, and I cried some more. I was on cloud 9 for a short but very long 27 minutes. I didn’t want it to end. And then the bomb was dropped, he was in a committed relationship! I was devastated. I stayed in bed the entire next day. That was two weeks ago and I haven’t been able to stop the pain. One week later He showed up at my sons game, ( we both have ties to my sons team, so he wasn’t there for us) but he took pictures of my son and sent them to me and congratulated him ( through me ) on the win. I was hopeful again and thought maybe he and the one he was committed to were on the outs. He reached out a few more times each time a little more flirtatious. I’m not going to lie, it felt good. I know i should’ve asked what was going on with the girlfriend and if she knew he was texting me, but i didn’t! I was too afraid of the answer because all i wanted to hear was that they broke up, but i know in my heart they didn’t. I wish he never reached out bc i am back at square one with the hurt! I can’t eat, I’m not sleeping and I’ve been in the same clothes for three days now. Idk what is going on in his head, but part of me feels so bad for him bc i know he is obviously so confused and it hurts me to think that he is so alone with these thoughts. I told him that i miss him and that i still love him. Idk what to aside from the obvious of blocking him and never look back, but what if he and his gf did break up and this could be the start of something. Someone please help me bc i am drowning in this grief and i don’t have anyone to turn to!  Link to post Share on other sites
Wiseman2 Posted November 6, 2020 Share Posted November 6, 2020 Sorry to hear that. What was the breakup about? It would be best to block and delete him. At this point you are feeding his ego at your own expense. Never tell someone who dumped you and is now in another relationship that you love them Don't be a doormat for this guy. Imagine what he was doing behind your back if he's supposedly in a committed relationship now. Don't be sad be angry that you left the door open for this nonsense . You'll feel better when you regain your dignity by deleting and blocking him This way you can close this chapter and move forward Link to post Share on other sites
GeorgiaPeach1 Posted November 10, 2020 Share Posted November 10, 2020 Something is going rocky in his life, and he wants validation. He knew you would provide it, being that you didn't want the break up. He reached out for him, not for you. 2 Link to post Share on other sites
lee179108 Posted November 13, 2020 Share Posted November 13, 2020 You will have to tell him how this is making you feel bad, that you still have feelings and unless he wants to see how it goes with you and break it off with his gf then you cant talk anymore... im not saying for you to tell him you both should dive back in.. but take it slow and build and develop a relationship if thats what you want. But its either her or you... and if its not you then you can just delete him and not talk... Link to post Share on other sites
ExpatInItaly Posted November 13, 2020 Share Posted November 13, 2020 This is typical of some people who are having a rocky patch and seek out their ex for an ego-stroke and attention. And it tells you a lot about his character. It's not good. A decent man doesn't do things like this, OP. 2 Link to post Share on other sites
Luna66star Posted November 19, 2020 Share Posted November 19, 2020 You should not give this man one more ounce of your time! Sorry but he's only using you for an ego boost. No contact from him in 9 mos and he suddenly gets in touch out out of the blue? I would immediately have stopped in my tracks asking myself if this man really cared about me, why did he go MIA for 9 months? Huge red flag!!! It seems you went NC to get him back, or was it to heal yourself? I think you were hoping he would reach out. When he did, hope resurfaced in your heart, only to be kicked in the stomach once again!! He obviously had no regard for your feelings and thought he could pop up back on your life & start flirting? This man is in another relationship and feels he can do whatever he wants when he wants! His character is the lowest of the low. Place strong boundaries up with this guy and do not shed one more tear over this creep! He is not worthy of your time. Guys get away with this carefree and careless behavior because we let them saunter back into our lives with no reprucussions. Sorry to sound so harsh but I went through the same thing as you and learned a hard lesson. Link to post Share on other sites
gamon Posted November 20, 2020 Share Posted November 20, 2020 You could go the vindictive revenge route and contact the girlfriend (if possible) and tell her he's been flirting with you and is indicating he wants to get back together. Maybe she'll kick him to the curb and he'll come back to you with his tail between his legs. Disclaimer- this is probably really bad advice it's just something I thought of on the fly that might make you feel a bit better if only for a short while. Link to post Share on other sites
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