Author Rtkennedy1 Posted November 22, 2020 Author Share Posted November 22, 2020 I can't understand how she could leave her whole life behind and its shattering. Im fearing the holidays and her not making contact. Its been about a week no contact and I know that isn't enough time. Her words were so wishy washy about coming home and asking for space and time. Ive always been one to be able to confront and solve problem, and its just not possible here. Im looking for hope everyday and know i have to give that up. Jus very hard when you love someone. She left one photo of me on her facebook. I didn't look myself, a friend told me. I know i shouldn't be looking for clues but I can't help it. Link to post Share on other sites
Ellener Posted November 22, 2020 Share Posted November 22, 2020 There's no going back @Rtkennedy1 I know you wish you could just fix things or even just understand. I hope you feel better soon, look after yourself. 1 1 Link to post Share on other sites
Author Rtkennedy1 Posted November 23, 2020 Author Share Posted November 23, 2020 Is it wrong for me to hope she regrets it. I'd be willing to go to hell and back and it feels like I'm going tbrough it now. Im occupying myself and exhausting myself with push-ups and situps just to sleep. I pine for her hourly and I thank you all for the support. I feel like two people in my life are now gone forever and I just wish i could turn it off the way I sesmed to have been turned off like a switch. 1 Link to post Share on other sites
Author Rtkennedy1 Posted November 23, 2020 Author Share Posted November 23, 2020 I just want to turn this nightmare off Link to post Share on other sites
Ellener Posted November 23, 2020 Share Posted November 23, 2020 1 hour ago, Rtkennedy1 said: Is it wrong for me to hope she regrets it. I'd be willing to go to hell and back and it feels like I'm going tbrough it now. Im occupying myself and exhausting myself with push-ups and situps just to sleep. I pine for her hourly and I thank you all for the support. I feel like two people in my life are now gone forever and I just wish i could turn it off the way I sesmed to have been turned off like a switch. I'm sorry you are going through this. Sending love and good thoughts for your grieving and for your healing. Link to post Share on other sites
schlumpy Posted November 23, 2020 Share Posted November 23, 2020 Type into your browser "cheating 180". Various incarnations of the 180 program will then be available. Choose a variation that you feel you can live with. If you religiously apply it to your life it should shorten your period of distress. Do not view it as a way to get your Ex back. It is not meant to do that. It's about making you a better person then you remember and lifting the fog from your brain. It's not an instant cure but you will like the results as will your next GF. Find a friend that is willing to listen to you or just keep pouring out your thoughts on this forum. Link to post Share on other sites
Wiseman2 Posted November 23, 2020 Share Posted November 23, 2020 Did you both live in your mother's house? Do you think she will be back to get her stuff? Has she ever done anything impulsive before? Link to post Share on other sites
Author Rtkennedy1 Posted November 23, 2020 Author Share Posted November 23, 2020 Yes, we both lived together. I have no idea if she's ever getting her things. I haven't heard from her or her family at all. Im still in the dark Link to post Share on other sites
Author Rtkennedy1 Posted November 23, 2020 Author Share Posted November 23, 2020 I dont understand the cheaters 180 1 Link to post Share on other sites
Wiseman2 Posted November 23, 2020 Share Posted November 23, 2020 10 minutes ago, Rtkennedy1 said: Yes, we both lived together. I have no idea if she's ever getting her things. I haven't heard from her or her family at all. Im still in the dark Did you live in your mother's house? Why aren't you contacting her/her family with regard to removing her belongings? Link to post Share on other sites
Author Rtkennedy1 Posted November 23, 2020 Author Share Posted November 23, 2020 Yes, I bought my moms house a month priir to her passing. Ive packed up and boxed her things. I guess im holding on to them to be the bigger person and give it more time. I'd like to hooe she would at least call or come for them and I would get some answers Link to post Share on other sites
Author Rtkennedy1 Posted November 23, 2020 Author Share Posted November 23, 2020 How can I do the 180, im already No contact for more than a week Link to post Share on other sites
Wiseman2 Posted November 23, 2020 Share Posted November 23, 2020 (edited) 3 hours ago, Rtkennedy1 said: Yes, I bought my moms house a month priir to her passing. Ive packed up and boxed her things. I guess im holding on to them to be the bigger person and give it more time. I'd like to hooe she would at least call or come for them and I would get some answers Did you Both live in your mother's house and for how long? Why not text/call her/her family and get some answers regarding her stuff and what to do with it. Is she still getting mail there? Is your mother's house still her legal residence? You need to know because you can't just toss her stuff if she technically /legally still resides there This "no contact" thing is nonsense, it won't "get your ex back", it's not a tool for that. You need some facts not 'no contact' games. Edited November 23, 2020 by Wiseman2 Link to post Share on other sites
Author Rtkennedy1 Posted November 23, 2020 Author Share Posted November 23, 2020 No her legel res was still her parent, she asked for space and time so that's what I'm giving her.. i just want to do anything I can to get her back. Link to post Share on other sites
Author Rtkennedy1 Posted November 23, 2020 Author Share Posted November 23, 2020 I love this girl with all of my heart and this is killing me Link to post Share on other sites
Ellener Posted November 23, 2020 Share Posted November 23, 2020 49 minutes ago, Rtkennedy1 said: I love this girl with all of my heart and this is killing me Thinking of you, hang in there, it will get easier. Link to post Share on other sites
Author Rtkennedy1 Posted November 23, 2020 Author Share Posted November 23, 2020 Im having thoughtsbof flying down there i don't know what to do Link to post Share on other sites
Wiseman2 Posted November 23, 2020 Share Posted November 23, 2020 6 minutes ago, Rtkennedy1 said: Im having thoughtsbof flying down there i don't know what to do Don't. You are grieving your mother's death and on top of it the strain if her sudden departure. Talk to her. It's that simple. Link to post Share on other sites
Acacia98 Posted November 23, 2020 Share Posted November 23, 2020 8 minutes ago, Rtkennedy1 said: Im having thoughtsbof flying down there i don't know what to do I don't think that's a good idea. If you get there and she refuses to see you, it will trigger even more anguish in you. Please look for someone you can talk to where you are. Maybe a grief counsellor. Maybe a priest (if you're religious). Maybe friends or relatives. 2 Link to post Share on other sites
Author Rtkennedy1 Posted November 25, 2020 Author Share Posted November 25, 2020 Still haven't heard from her, holidays coming. Hurts Link to post Share on other sites
Ellener Posted November 25, 2020 Share Posted November 25, 2020 24 minutes ago, Rtkennedy1 said: holidays coming. Hurts Hang in there. (((((((((((((((((((((((((((((((( )))))))))))))))))))))))))))))))))))))))))) Link to post Share on other sites
Author Rtkennedy1 Posted November 25, 2020 Author Share Posted November 25, 2020 Would it be the right step to call her on Thanksgiving simply to wish her a happy thanksgiving Link to post Share on other sites
Author Rtkennedy1 Posted November 25, 2020 Author Share Posted November 25, 2020 Looking for anymore insight. Im workingbon myself and seeing Dr for depression and therapy. It hasn't helped much yet and I cant concentrate on anything but having her return to my lifd Link to post Share on other sites
Ellener Posted November 25, 2020 Share Posted November 25, 2020 What are you going to do tomorrow? Do you have something to cook, and a book or show picked out? My life is quite lonely at the moment various reasons I can't change right now, so I keep myself occupied with growing things, cooking, positive movies and shows, painting, reading... It gets easier. Link to post Share on other sites
Author Rtkennedy1 Posted November 25, 2020 Author Share Posted November 25, 2020 Tomorrow il excersize, read , and eat a simple meal. Probably alone. Il probly wait for a textbor call like a chump. And another lesson will be learned 1 Link to post Share on other sites
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