notyouraveragebabe Posted November 23, 2020 Share Posted November 23, 2020 Hi, I can’t even believe I am posting this. My best friend since childhood recently got engaged. We use to party and live the single life together until she met her fiancé two years ago. I am truly happy for her, but I’m sad that I’m still single. Everyone else got engaged and married and I’m still single. No, I’m not ugly or fat. I’m actually quite the opposite. I date just nobody who commits. Link to post Share on other sites
Ellener Posted November 23, 2020 Share Posted November 23, 2020 I think it's the test of a friendship not just being there for someone when they go through a difficult time- but how pleased we are when their life seems way better than ours @notyouraveragebabe Stay positive, your time will come. 3 Link to post Share on other sites
GeorgiaPeach1 Posted November 23, 2020 Share Posted November 23, 2020 1 hour ago, notyouraveragebabe said: Hi, I can’t even believe I am posting this. My best friend since childhood recently got engaged. We use to party and live the single life together until she met her fiancé two years ago. I am truly happy for her, but I’m sad that I’m still single. Everyone else got engaged and married and I’m still single. No, I’m not ugly or fat. I’m actually quite the opposite. I date just nobody who commits. Your “ugly or fat comment” reveals something about your character and personality. 1 1 Link to post Share on other sites
Syd8 Posted November 25, 2020 Share Posted November 25, 2020 Say goodbye to your friend. Soon she'll say she's "too busy" to spend time with you. Trust me, it happens. 2 Link to post Share on other sites
ShyViolet Posted November 25, 2020 Share Posted November 25, 2020 I don't even understand this post. Just because you are still single, and sad about being single, what does this have to do with the fact that your friend got engaged? Why are you comparing yourself to your friend? It's not a competition. 1 Link to post Share on other sites
SolG Posted November 26, 2020 Share Posted November 26, 2020 (edited) On 11/24/2020 at 12:11 AM, notyouraveragebabe said: Hi, I can’t even believe I am posting this. My best friend since childhood recently got engaged. We use to party and live the single life together until she met her fiancé two years ago. I am truly happy for her, but I’m sad that I’m still single. Everyone else got engaged and married and I’m still single. No, I’m not ugly or fat. I’m actually quite the opposite. I date just nobody who commits. Don't feel bad. I get it. Most people feel a little conflicted sometimes - even about the good fortune of loved ones. I remember my daughter moving in with her boyfriend (now fiance), and feeling both a sense of pride and happiness that she was so grown up and excited, but also quite wistful that she would no longer be living with me and our relationship was going to fundamentally change. Relationships change, and that can feel a bit uncomfortable. Particularly if you feel like you're not keeping pace or heading in a different direction. Who knows... Maybe a few years from now you'll be ensconced in your own relationship and you'll catch up at coupley backyard cookouts. Or maybe you'll still be single and fancy free and she'll be the one a bit happy for you and simultaneously wistful when you catch up and share your latest adventures! It's ok to feel what you feel. Just don't dwell and let it impact what sounds like has been a wonderful friendship. Let it evolve into a new chapter. Edited November 26, 2020 by SolG Word correction. 1 Link to post Share on other sites
lana-banana Posted November 26, 2020 Share Posted November 26, 2020 It's normal to occasionally (but not often or always) react to good news with a sense of guilt: oh no, everyone is doing great and I'm such a loser! Feel that feeling, then let it pass. You can't realistically compare people's lives to yours, no matter how tempting, because we are all very different people making different choices. And lose the negativity about others - "ugly or fat" people get married too. If you focus on yourself and don't lose sight of your values, you'll be in a good place to attract a healthy partner. 1 Link to post Share on other sites
Watercolors Posted November 28, 2020 Share Posted November 28, 2020 OP, I don’t think the issue here is that your friend is engaged to get married. I think the real issue here is that you are upset that you keep attracting and dating emotionally unavailable guys. Be happy for your friend. Don’t conflate her engagement with your single status. 1 Link to post Share on other sites
Pumaza Posted December 9, 2020 Share Posted December 9, 2020 Enjoy your life,when it comes it comes. Do adult stuff,stop the partying.Socialize,go activaties, travel.do charity,learn new good things. Link to post Share on other sites
Author notyouraveragebabe Posted January 25, 2021 Author Share Posted January 25, 2021 (edited) On 11/23/2020 at 5:11 AM, notyouraveragebabe said: Edited January 25, 2021 by notyouraveragebabe Link to post Share on other sites
d0nnivain Posted January 26, 2021 Share Posted January 26, 2021 Many of us have been there. It kinda sucks because you need a whole new group of people to hang with while your married friends go off & be all couple-y & married. Still you plaster a smile on your face & celebrate with her while you work to broaden your friend group to find new people to hang with . . . they are there. You may find yourself becoming closer to friends of friends because they are single too. 1 Link to post Share on other sites
Mysterio Posted February 5, 2021 Share Posted February 5, 2021 Its different for me. I still basically have all my childhood friends that are married with me. One is out of the loop. Yet his Wife still invited me to his 50th bday. Everyone has different dynamics. So far so good. Link to post Share on other sites
dramafreezone Posted February 5, 2021 Share Posted February 5, 2021 OP, you need to take responsibility and go for what you want. Like a lot of women in your same position, you're likely going for your "type" and hoping over and over again that they'll eventually want to get married. If that type wanted marriage you would be married. Insanity is doing the same thing over and over expecting a different result. You have to hack the part of your brain that picks men because it's broken. Link to post Share on other sites
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