Lilly Bubbles Posted October 13, 2005 Share Posted October 13, 2005 Maybe someone can help me! my hubby and i have been together for 6 years and married for 5. We were high school sweet hearts. We have 2 children and up untill about a year ago i guess we were still acting like newly wedds. He decided june of last year that he wanted to join a millitary branch "for the family".Well a few weeks after he sighned up and had a date to leave we found out that i was preg. with our second child.He went with me on my first doc. app.( the one that they do the pap.) anywho..... He left the next day for trainning. about a month later I go back to find out that everything is fine exc. one of my test results came back possitive for an STD. Thank GOD it could b taken care of by a shot of anti. I considered my self lucky that it wasn't something worse and then felt so stupid for not knowing what all my hsband could b up 2. I found out alot that i did not know about him though out the next few months. And of couse that changed the way i felt 4 him. But with him leaving to go over sea's and me fixing to have a baby i didn't tell him that i wanted a diviorce. I really didnt know what to do at the time. I wanted to believe him when he said that he didn't do anything but that was neer imposible at this point. Now im to present day and i dont know how to tell him. He is still over sea's and wont be back till early next year and i dont know if it would b a good idea to tell him while he is over there or to wait longer. I still love him very much it is just not the same as it was the first 4.5 years that we were together. Any ideas ????? Link to post Share on other sites
tonyp56 Posted October 14, 2005 Share Posted October 14, 2005 I'd say wait until he gets home at least. He has enough on his mind now to worry about his wife wanting a divorce. Tell him you want to talk, then tell him you want a divorce. (unless you are afraid of him, then you may want to do something different) That said, is there anyway that you can work this out. Have you went to therepy? If not, you might think about it. It may help you work things out, perhaps decide divorce isn't right, but even if that isn't the case, it should help you with YOU. I can say from experience, my wife cheated on me about two years after we got married (about 6 years together), and I forgave her. But it took me a long time to get over it, I couldn't stop thinking about it. I would have been fine, but now she has left me for someone else, and I found out when I found out about this one, that there was another affair back around the first that I didn't know about. Of course I forgave her not only for this one but that one too, and she paid me back by leaving me (she started the affair about 7 months ago, I found out, forgave, told her to stop). My point is, sometimes once a cheater always a cheater. Learn from my mistake and don't become a serial forgiver! It sounds like you won't be able to. It sounds like he won't even admit he did wrong, you got a VD from him, and he actually told you that nothing happened, bulls***. I wouldn't blame you if you didn't forgive him or if you did, but please learn from my mistake and don't allow yourself to forgive to much. If he would just admit it, it would probably be easier on you. Good luck, and I am sorry. Link to post Share on other sites
Lilly Bubbles Posted October 17, 2005 Share Posted October 17, 2005 thank u 4 ur input i totaly agree. The only problem is that i don't know how he will react to me wanting to leave.So... I guess im kind of scared.He told me here while back that i was growing old with him whether i liked it or not (jokingly) but it still gave me shivers. sence then he has been wanting to take me somewhere 4 the weekend and without the kids (when he got back).So if u have any ideas on how to tell him plz lt me know. Again thanks 4 the reply. Link to post Share on other sites
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