Need advice...she moved out.

[Chaps]

Thank you in advance to the people who can help me see more clearly.

 

My girlfriend and I have been together for a little over a year. We were living together already, and just the other day she moved to her moms house (not everything, just all her clothes and day to day stuff).

 

It all started this past Saturday when we were at a professional football game. We had plans of going out with each other and some friends after the game and having fun. A friend asked me in the 3rd quarter what we were doing. I asked my gf where we were going to go and she responded by saying she didn't think we should go out drinking together that night. Her reasoning was that for some reason, she was feeling jealous during the first half (we were fine and cuddly, so I was confused), and when she drinks, those types of things get blown up and we fight. I kind of got upset by this, because i wanted to spend the night with her. I kinda watched the game and didn't say much, she ended up leaving in the 4th quarter because she was upset.

 

Anyways, I went home after the game, and she went out with the friends we were supposed to go out with. She didn't come home that night, she went to her moms place. The next day, she came by and picking up our new puppy...hardly said 2 words to me, and stayed at her moms again that night. Monday she came over and we talked and she wanted to end it. Not because of what happened, but just that being the final straw. She didn't understand what she did wrong to make me mad.

 

Now a little history. The reason she was jealous:

 

A couple months ago, she was working (she works until 4-3am every night at a bar). I went to a go-away party for someone at work. I didn't really want to go, but I felt I had to...so I bought 6 beer and went. I ended up staying and finishing those 6 beer, have a few shots of weird hard liquor tequila and some other crap) and ended up in a hot tub which just messed me up huge. It was a 6-8 person hot tub with about 12 people in it, so people were sitting on other peoples laps. This one girl sat on my lap. I thought fine, my gf isn't the jealous type, it's innocent...whatever...this girl knew I had a girlfriend. Well this girl tried to kiss me as I was talking to other people and managed to lay a good one on me. I told her no, I have a girlfriend and I don't want to mess things up. She tried again later and wanted to "go further". I declined and eventually got up and left. I got changed, went and told a bunch of guys in the house that there was some desperate chick out in the hot tub..little did I know she was standing right behind me.

 

SOOOO...I left and drove home drunk which I shouldn't have, but I HAD to leave...I couldn't stand being there.

 

The next morning I told my girlfriend what happened. At first she was a little curious about it...but over the next couple days she got extremely upset and wanted to end our relationship. We ended up staying together, and things were great, but every once in a while she gets upset by it. Saturday was one of those days.

 

So now she has moved out, and has been gone for about 5 days. We didn't talk to each other much, but we're talking a bit more now...but still haven't really seen each other. She says she needs time and space, and she's having a hard time letting this go. She says I cheated on her and that why she's so hurt. Now I know what happened isn't cool for her, but I didn't try anything or initiate anything...nor did I have any desire to...and I would never intentionally hurt her or cheat on her.

 

Now she spends her time hanging out at her work...and her work friends are not helping. I talked to her today and she said there is a rumour that I am talking to her on coworker on the phone all the time which is absolutely bogus. I don't know her number, NOR would I EVER want to even talk to her. The rumour was started by the girl herself. I think my gf knows it's bogus and I told her there was no way.

 

Anyways, what do I do right now? I don't know how to help her get past this. I tell her I miss her, and she says she misses me. I tell her I love her, she tells me she loves me. She says she just hopes she can get over this, but she needs space and time. She started smoking again too after 4 months of not smoking.

 

I really want her to get past this and have us have a healthy relationship. I told her we should likely take a step back and not live together for a bit.

 

Anyone have any suggestions or advice? Thank you kindly.

[Princess1975]

Just give her the time and space she's asking for... Be there, but in a friendly and understanding way, and not 24/7. Let her think clearly and miss you..

 

I hope everthing works out fine for you guys!! =)