How do you super avg guys get really hot gfs?

[understand50]

It all comes down to this, He/She said yes. They both decided to give it a go.  Too many men and women, just go though life looking or being  picky and never committing, so when the time come, it is those that say the magic word "yes " that you go with.  Being with someone who loves you, wants to be with you, wants to have children, beats all the looks the world.  In a another word, commitment.

[flitzanu]

maybe the girl isn't actually as hot to others as you think she might be, and the guy is in fact hotter than her.

regardless of how hot a girl might be, behind every hot person, there is an Ex that is sick of their crap.  she may be absolutely awful, and maybe this guy is dumb enough to put up with her.

maybe the guy is a psycho and beats her, maybe she's with him out of fear and insecurity that she deserves it and can't do better.

those are dark angles, but angles still, that are possibilities.

 

  

[sothereiwas]

7 hours ago, elaine567 said:

I think women who are average can catapult themselves into "hot" with makeup, great hair, nice clothes, push up padded bras, breast implants and big heels... etc.

I think those things impress other women more than they impress guys to be honest. 

[Shining One]

12 minutes ago, sothereiwas said:

I think those things impress other women more than they impress guys to be honest. 

Some of us guys get fooled by them. We approach a girl based on what we imagine is under the makeup and clothes only to be disappointed when they're removed.

[snowboy91]

On 12/28/2020 at 4:52 PM, Shortskirtslonglashes said:

I just don’t understand this league concept at all. If it is dependent on so many factors, including just personal compatibility, how can it be a scale like higher/below .  This word is meaningless to me by now. 

And in my opinion, as it should be. I don't understand the rule that highly attractive people can only date other highly attractive people. I understand why some have the wealth/status thing since it factors into compatibility to a certain extent (desired lifestyles etc), but why isn't the focus on personal compatibility in the first place?

That's essentially why it can't be a scale. You could have two people with similar looks and similar social status, but if the personalities don't click, it won't work. Similarly, what's to say that someone of average looks and someone really attractive can't just vibe really nicely together? 

[DarrenB]

90% of most people's lives aren't publicised on social media, so to call him 'basic' is a pretty bold assumption to make based on such minimal evidence that you found on his profile...

 

[Ruby_Red]

21 minutes ago, DarrenB said:

90% of most people's lives aren't publicised on social media, so to call him 'basic' is a pretty bold assumption to make based on such minimal evidence that you found on his profile...

 

That’s true, I suppose. This whole social media thing is a curse. You just don’t  get the whole picture on SM, ever - no matter what. 

[Weezy1973]

34 minutes ago, snowboy91 said:

I don't understand the rule that highly attractive people can only date other highly attractive people.

To be clear it’s not a rule at all. It’s just a fact that in long term relationships couples tend to match in terms of physical attractiveness. It’s called the matching phenomenon and there’s been a lot of research on it. But of course there will be cases where it isn’t true.

 

The reason people tend to refer to it from time to time, is that if someone isn’t having any success dating, one of the reasons might be that they’re “shooting out of their league”. For men, this would look like constant rejection, no matches, no answers to messages on OLD etc. For women they’d experience some of the above but also would find men that are willing to have sex with them, but not commit to a relationship. 

[sothereiwas]

52 minutes ago, Weezy1973 said:

It’s just a fact that in long term relationships couples tend to match in terms of physical attractiveness.

People tend to settle for what they can hang onto. If one looks at the research that's basically the reality of it. In studies where the potential relationship was assured (the people interviewed were assured the people in the photos had already expressed an interest in a relationship with the interviewed person) the interviewees picked the hottest choice. 

The dynamic isn't that hard to suss out really.

Edited December 30, 2020 by sothereiwas

[Weezy1973]

1 minute ago, sothereiwas said:

People tend to settle for what they can hang onto. If one looks at the research that's basically the reality of it. In studies where the potential relationship was assured (the people interviewed were assured the people in the photos had already expressed an interest in a relationship) the interviewees picked the hottest choice. 

The dynamic isn't that hard to suss out really.

That’s a different phenomenon, which is called aspirational dating. It’s the tendency to be most attracted to people that are out of our league. But that, for the most part, is a losing proposition. Which is why people end up with people of similar attractiveness levels.

[Miss Spider]

But there’s been other research done with established couples. E.g. Murstein(1972), White(1980) https://en.m.wikipedia.org/wiki/Matching_hypothesis

 

Edited December 30, 2020 by Shortskirtslonglashes

[Ruby_Red]

2 minutes ago, sothereiwas said:

People tend to settle for what they can hang onto. If one looks at the research that's basically the reality of it. In studies where the potential relationship was assured (the people interviewed were assured the people in the photos had already expressed an interest in a relationship) the interviewees picked the hottest choice. 

The dynamic isn't that hard to suss out really.

What studies are these? Did they interview males and females? I am inclined to believe this to be true for male interviewees. I do not believe this to be true for females to the same extent,  though.

[dramafreezone]

I think to try to boil attraction down to a single reason is not possible.  I think the simplest way to explain it is to say it depends on what that woman values.

I'm not going to say that looks don't matter, but I think with women, unless they're incredibly vain, they just have to see you as meeting the minimum standard for looks, like if C- is the passing grade then that's all it takes.  It's up to the rest of the guy's qualities to make up the difference.  As long as looks-wise he meets that minimum grade where she says, "hmmm, I guess" then that's enough.  If he has the personality, charisma, intelligence, humor, whatever that woman values, then he can get her.

 The most beautiful woman I ever attracted (that I know of) barely knew I was alive when we first began working together, and I'm certain that I didn't meet the mold that she typically went for.  As we got to know each other I guess I grew on her.  I guess it also helped that I never hit on her or saw her in that light, because I never thought I could get her.  At the same time, I was always confident around her, so I guess that was attractive to her.  Conversation was always light, funny, and I can say that she seemed to enjoy herself around me, was always very feminine.  That's the bottom line if there is one, women like a man that makes them feel good, but isn't trying to please them or entertain them.  He makes you feel good and attractive just by being himself.

Really such a broad topic, but always interesting to talk about.

Edited December 30, 2020 by dramafreezone

[sothereiwas]

2 hours ago, Weezy1973 said:

why people end up with people of similar attractiveness levels.

It's basic market economics. The currency is just unconventional.