tomtheman1234 Posted December 30, 2020 Share Posted December 30, 2020 (edited) I am a half English half Kiwi man born in NZ brought up in U.K. I have a mild form of Aspergers. So that makes life hard for me. I take medication as I have a little bit of anxiety. I never have ever really fitted into the U.K. way of life. In my adulterer I have lived in A few different parts the South East and south west of the U.K. I have lived in Australia abs New Zealand and London and spent some time Living in Spain and Thailand. I have been in an off and on again long distance relationship with this amazing Filipina. Due to covid we spent most of the first half of the year living in Thailand together in lockdown as we had been on holiday there we just decided to stay there. Then due to covid and visa restrictions in Thailand and Philippines we ended up going to the U.K. and getting married and living with my parents. It was ok as they have converted there garage into a family room so we ended up living out there most of the time so my wife was not mixing to much with my parents. My parents are able to look after themselves as they in the mid 70’s and they would give us lots of space to be just us together. After 3 months in the UK We ended up back in the Philippines. After half a week of moving into an apartment in Manila my Mother in Law came to stay. That was part of the deal. She is in here early 80’s when my wife was single her mother lived with her for 6 months each year than she would go to another member of the family for the rest of the year.after 3 and a bit months in Manila we are planning to move for 3 months to Siargao a hippie surf island in the Philippines to see if we can live there full time or not. But my wife is saying her mother has to come with us. Now my wife and I got married in mid October and did not have a honey due to covid and have not yet had that quality time together just us to see where we really want to live and really get to know each other. As much as I love my mother in law she is old a needy and my wife abs I are newly married so things change and her siblings should realise that. So now I am so of wishing I had not decided to give Philippines a go and thinking when the covid had calmed down and Australia has opened it boarders again that we might see if my wife and I could move to Australia as I have New Zealand passport. That way I be away from her family telling me what I do. I am hoping that when we go to siargao that my Mother in law can be passed on to another manner of the family. We have talked about it. Edited December 30, 2020 by tomtheman1234 Link to post Share on other sites
FMW Posted December 30, 2020 Share Posted December 30, 2020 Make sure to work with your wife to make sure that she doesn't have any bad feelings about passing her mother on to another family member. Good luck with your plans, it will be nice for you and our new wife to have a place on your own together without family always around. Link to post Share on other sites
Wiseman2 Posted December 30, 2020 Share Posted December 30, 2020 (edited) Unfortunately this may be a cultural incompatibly. She may be from a collectivist culture where it is understood that they take care of their elders and there is shame in running away from that tradition. Unfortunately you seem to have hit an impasse but hope to run away back to your western individualistic culture. Perhaps it's time to consider divorce/annulment to free both of you to be happy in your own worlds. Edited December 30, 2020 by Wiseman2 Link to post Share on other sites
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