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Observation


robaday

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On every breakup I have had. It is just when I am feeling really good and meeting new people after a really rough period that the ex contacts me. It is crazy the timing. Honestly every single breakup it is like some sixth sense, they have. They have no way of knowing what's going on with me I'm not on social networks and most aren't nearby. Anyone else notice this? I'm not superstitious nor do I believe in a higher power or mystical stuff....Is this common?

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21 minutes ago, robaday said:

 after a really rough period that the ex contacts me. It is crazy the timing. 

Why isn't she blocked? It's not fate, it's your own actions of keeping them around.

Cutting your losses is important in moving forward.

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You see patterns because you want to see them.  Many people feel like this happens. 

If they are an EX & reach out, just ignore.  What's the problem?

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GeorgiaPeach1

Yes, it's common. Exes don't return because they woke up one morning and suddenly realized they made a mistake by leaving. What usually happens is something hasn't panned out in their lives, or they themselves have been dumped. They need a quick hit of validation, and so they start looking through their contacts list. 

Not only should you not respond, but you should block and delete. Exes shouldn't even be able to contact you in the first place.

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I'm sorry I didn't mean it to sound like I was complaining or that it was a problem. More just an observation that doesn't really make sense logically (I don't believe in higher powers or spirituality) but the timing is always very eerie. Like I had literally got someone's number when she messaged ten minutes later! I was more commenting on the weird synchronicity of it than anything else - it has happened with every ex I have dated at exactly the turning point in my recovery. 

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Yes it is something that is well documented. See when we break up we're going through a process as the dumpee but the dumper also goes through a process and it's a process experienced on a different time line as us dumpee. At first they feel releived the relationship is over, then they start doubting themselves, and at some point they'll get back in touch just to see how it feels to them to confirm they've made the right decision, or to see if they still have a power of seduction over us, or to get some validation, and the list is long as to why they do it. The time it takes them to reach that part of their process coincide often with when we've accepted the break up. 

Edited by Gaeta
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