Sister-in-law.

[pepperbird2]

On 1/27/2021 at 7:49 PM, Western200 said:

So far some people think this is something others think my minds in the gutter but I’m leaning towards she’s throwing out signals. She’s always twirling her hair talking to me. 

And?
I do that too. It's a nervous habit and means absolutely nothing. I also do it when I'm  looking for a way to occupy my hands because I'm bored- that's really common in women.

[pepperbird2]

On 1/28/2021 at 6:55 AM, Starswillshine said:

Talking about taking a shower would never come on my radar about things inappropriate to say. And I'm pretty hard core about boundaries and appropriate things to say to people. Given what you have written here.... you are fantasizing about your sister-in-law and reading too much into what she is saying. 

 I think he's doing some wishful thinking.
 

[pepperbird2]

On 1/28/2021 at 2:38 PM, SRCSRC said:

I find your response to the question whether she is truly flirting with you a big problem.  Fantasies are fine, but it sounds like you would act on the fantasy but would probably chicken out.  Wrong answer.  The correct answer would be that you would never act on the fantasy because you love and honor your wife and would never cheat on her.  You would never do anything to put your marriage in jeopardy.  You, also, would not be a willing participant in destroying your sister-in-law's marriage.  Better get your head out of your ass before you do something utterly stupid and destructive.  Now, if signals from your SIL become obvious, do the correct thing and advise her to seek counseling before she screws up her marriage.  It takes two to maintain and escalate a flirtatious relationship.  Cut it off now before things blow up.  Don't spend so much alone time with the SIL at family functions and most of all, do not flirt with her.  You are probably already doing that.    

.OP, I'm not trying to be mean., but I really urge you to examine why this is such a big deal to you. Why is it so important to you that you know if she was hitting on you? {uch back all the nonsense and do some real soul searching.
Why does it matter if she's hitting on you or not? You have the option to say "no" and walk away.

[pepperbird2]

On 1/28/2021 at 4:48 PM, HadMeOverABarrel said:

Dude, sorry, but this post makes you seem creepy in a stalkerish kind of way. These are not signs.

[Akin to: She wanted me to do x to her because she wore a short skirt when she walked past me.]

If you related what you wrote here within my earshot in a public gathering, I would immediately head towards the exit, or at least I'd check where the exits are, keep my eye on your whereabouts, and put lots of space/barriers between us.

op,

this is really true, and I urge you to really do some soul searching. Before I got sick, I used to  get hit on a lot ( many women do). Since I wasn't interested, it never matter to me. I didn't need to go online and ask about about it..
You have taken a different tack.
Why?
like I said in previous post, please think long and hard about why it matters to you. Why are you so insistent on feeding the beast?

 

[pepperbird2]

On 1/30/2021 at 6:45 PM, mark clemson said:

To be fair, lethal fallout is rare (does happen, though). Blown up families though, well...

You're treading some dangerous ground and I suspect she is too. My guess is she's the type who like to flirt and get attention, watch the men get interested/hot and bothered, etc. You're around, so you get flirted with too.

Not the end of the world, but IF it starts looking like more than just that, absolutely shut it down. The chances of your wife finding out are high from the start (it's her SISTER after all). And in my opinion it's very unlikely she'd ever forgive you.

I find it interesting that many of the guys who responding say this could be flirting, while most of the women say otherwise...
Only she really knows, but I highly doubt she's hitting on him,

[ExpatInItaly]

On 1/28/2021 at 5:51 AM, Western200 said:

Reality me would probably wuss out and not do anything about it. 

Your choice of wording here makes it sound as though you forget that you're married. The real reason you should not do anything about is because, well, you are married. It's not "wussing out" to not cheat on your wife her own sister. It's troubling that the fact that you have a wife didn't feature in your line of thinking. 

On 1/28/2021 at 9:39 PM, Western200 said:

 Ladies I’m sure you tell your girlfriends you took a shower but would you tell your neighbor or husbands friend ? Or mailman over small chat? 

Weak analogy. 

Unless I'm particularly close with my mailman or neighbour or husband's friend, and consider them family. You are are her brother-in-law. Not some random man she kind of knows and makes small talk with. It's not that scandalous to mention a shower to a family member, OP. 

But for a moment, let's take the focus of your desperate hope that she wants you. What's going on in your marriage? Are you bored? Unhappy? 

[trident_2020]

A woman knows when a guy is attracted to her.

She's just enjoying the power trip of the tease, and throw in a bit of sibling rivalry she gets a kick out of getting some attention from her sisters husband.

You mean absolutely nothing to her.

Oh and by the way it's the "image" of her in the shower that you're jacking off too, not "imagine".

Edited February 1, 2021 by trident_2020